Extreme clinginess to father only - please help

[YRGAM]

I posted about this here before but it's just getting worse and worse. Our 14mo son is massively clingy just to me (his dad) - I can't put him to bed as he screams the second I leave the room (he goes down straight away with his mother), I can't drop him off at nursery without him getting totally distressed, my wife can't play with him or hold him when I'm in the roomnas he cries and goes to me. This has been going on for about 3 months now. Has anybody faced this, and is there anything I can do to stop it?

Anyone?

Are you my other half?! Our 15 month old is the same. It got better initially but since the arrival of baby number two last week, has become so much worse. I’d say support your wife (being rejected by a small angry and confused person is utterly heart breaking), plenty of one on one time with you both. DS actually behaves far better and is more content with me, he thinks he wants his dad but the reality is tantrums and clinging.

It will pass (as I keep telling myself) but in the meantime we are aiming for consistency, stability and one on one time. has anything changed in his life to set this off (mum pregnant, new baby, nursery etc?).

It will pass l, you all just need to ride it out until it does. My DD went through a phase of only wanting Daddy for over 6 months. It genuinely felt like she hated me and although I kept trying to tell myself it was a phase, I actually found it really upsetting. Then 2 months ago everything changed. She's become quite clingy with me, isn't bothered with daddy and will only let me put her to bed. I can't really offer any advice, other than just go with it, offer comfort when they're upset and clingy and try and be patient with the tantrums that occur when they can't be with the favoured parent. I'm sure your little one will becomes less clingy to you eventually.

Yes this happened to me. From 14 months to 3.4 years my ds1 only wanted anyone but me and always his dad. Alone it was fine but in company he only wanted the other person. He even went through a stage of calling me by first name and not mum.

At the time I felt sad, rejected, embarrassed and ashamed - what must people think of my parenting?!

Well it did pass, my second son was nothing like my first and so with hindsight I would say it was a phase that will pass that was not connected to my parenting!!

DS1 is 10 now and he always spontaneously hugs me at school in front of all his friends- so the toddler years are a distant memory.

Thank you for your advice. @Homassy, yes there had been quite a significant change in that I was with him at home for 3 months until January while my wife went back to work, at which point I also returned to work and he started to go to nursery. So I imagine this is why, but it's been 2 months now and nothing has really changed. It's good to know that it is a common phase and will pass. My wife understands theres not much to be done, but it must be hard for her,it's not nice to see our son want me all the time. But it's good to know it will pass!

*Thank you all for your advice

You say his mum can put him down at night, does she drop him at nursery with no fuss too?
Just wondering if he is sensing you are a softer touch!
Are you flattered he seems to want you more? You say you feel bad for your wife like she is somehow missing out?

Not flattered, no. I feel bad because it's not nice if your child acts like they don't want you, as posters in this thread have said. I wouldn't say I'm a softer touch, we are very consistent in how we parent him. She can drop him at nursery without fuss, but due to our working hours it's almost always me that does it.