Breastfeeding and childcare

[CrazyKitkatLady]

Hi all, I’m looking for some experiences on breastfeeding and childcare / returning to work.

At the moment my DD feeds 6 times a day:
Wake up (usually only a quick feed) 6ish
Nap 8ish
Nap 10/11ish
Nap 2.30/3ish
Pre dinner 5
Bed 6-6.30ish

She can go longer in between feeds if we’re out and about but the only way I can get her to sleep in the house is with boob (and over the winter I’ve got very lazy about going out for walks / naps in the pram)

She’ll be starting nursery 2 days per week next month to hopefully settle her well before I go back to work towards the end of June.

I don’t respond to a pump at all (literally not a drop) so sending EBM in with her won’t be an option and equally I won’t be able to express easily if I get engorged.

She’ll be 9 months when she starts. Ideally I’d like to continue to breastfeed.

She’ll probably be 10 months by the time she does a full day - would she be ok with food and water by then and a feed in the morning / when she gets home? (And at night if she still wants it) she’s never had a bottle but will take water from an open cup with help fairly happily.

Will my boobs be able to cope with feeding her to sleep for naps on the days she’s with me but not on the days she isn’t? Or should I try and drop those feeds between now and then?

Once I go to work in June she’ll be with her grandparents the days she’s not in nursery and they live literally round the corner so if I needed to feed her to relieve engorgement it’s quite easy to pop round for 5 mins.

In my ideal world I’d continue to feed on demand whenever she’s with me and just not feed when she’s away but is that a fast track to mastitis? Does anyone have any advice for a lockdown FTM?

Sorry for the long ramble!

She might drop feeds by then anyway as her solid intake increases. I swapped feeds around at some point so she fed on waking rather than for naps and then she sometimes refused that so I offered and then gave a snack/water instead if she refused, and that became the norm. I've stayed at home with mine so not a personal insight, but from what I've seen from others she should be ok by that point feeding on demand when with you and with food and water with others. You might need to hand express for relief and to avert mastitis to start with but should adjust fairly quickly. Might be worth giving the nursery a call just to discuss and ask what others do with breastfed babies at that age? I've seen some send expressed milk that doesn't even get touched because baby isn't interested. You could send in formula if worried about milk intake (as expressing isn't an option- same for me!) but again she might not want anything else. If she's good with water in a cup she'll stay hydrated at least! To start with you could feed more often when she's with grandparents to ease you both into it but long term it should be fine.

I went back to work FT when my DS was 9 months old. During the week the last night feed is around 4/5am. Then I feed him again at 4/5pm when I pick him up, then at 7pm just before bed. Then the night time feeds which can be anything from 1-4 short feeds. On the weekends he feeds a lot more, when he wakes up, before both naps and if he wants comfort. My breast just adapt. Maybe 1-2 days of being uncomfortable if I’ve been off work for more than a week so feeding a lot more. But it is easily doable and I don’t ever pump or have the opportunity to feed during my working day. Plus I wouldn’t do that, because I would keep having to do that, if you keep emptying your breast they will think that’s the demand and keep making more.

I was in a very similar position with my first, it helped my supply (but not my sanity !) That he fed during the night. I went back 3 or 4 12 hour shifts a week.
Woke at 0500/0530 fed baby dream feed then left for work
Got home around 2000 fed baby then he co slept with me and fed whenever.
On days off he fed as normal. It took about 2 shifts for my supply to settle and I fed him until he was 17 months.

He fed small amounts all day to no routine so it was really difficult to guess for nursery but a normal routine for a baby that age would be bf on waking, morning bottle, afternoon bottle and bf at bed. So I sent him to nursery with a small Tommy tippee cup and 2 little cartons of formula (always sent 3 but he never took more than 1 and a bit). He would tend to hold off to feed but you have to make sure that the nursery have something to give, thankfully DS was very into solids.

Also don't worry about her napping at nursery without a feed, nursery workers are miracle workers at getting babies to sleep. The had my nocturnal nap refusing boy casually settling down to a nap on a crash mat.

Personally I would get mastitis but I am very prone to blocked ducts. Avoid tight fitting clothes, side lying, baby wearing etc on childcare days.
If I was you I would thoroughly troubleshoot to ensure I definitely could not pump. What pump do you have and are you definitely using the right flange size? This can make a huge difference. Some pumps are just rubbish. I can pump absolutely nothing with a Tommee Tippee but can pump 100mls+ in 20 minutes with a Medela or a Spectra. Have you been able to hand express anything? You could at least alleviate some discomfort that way when away from baby. Your supply will likely drop if you go two full work days without removing milk.
I’m sure you already know this but prolactin levels are highest at night so if baby wakes overnight feeding her back to sleep then might be a good option to keep up supply (although it doesn’t look like she is currently waking overnight but the next sleep regression will be around when she starts childcare).

@Crikeycroc I’ve tried 3 different pumps and a hakka, my boobs just won’t cooperate! I haven’t been able to hand express since the very early days but to be fair I haven’t had much reason to try but I’ll double check I know the right way to do it and maybe have a practice. My boobs never feel full any more so maybe it’ll be easier to get some out if they are a bit full?

Baby feeds at least 3 times over night sometimes more but I’m planning to continue to let her do this as long as she needs, hoping that will be enough to keep my supply up even when I’m back at work. We cosleep so I don’t really get disturbed by it.

I went back about that age and my milk supply just magically settled to suit both times. I left those little premade formula bottles for when I was at work. I found they'd want to feed the moment I returned home so on work days we ended up in a morning/after work/bedtime/nighttime schedule. On my non working days they fed more often and it just worked out.

I had a bit of discomfort and engorgement on work days the first week or so and then it was fine.

I think at this stage when feeding is well established your body responds really well to whatever the new routine is

Also I could never express either.

@Jenala I’m really hoping this is the case for me too! Glad to know it’s possible

Reading with interest as about to face the same with DD2 and starting to get a bit anxious, even though we've already been through it all with DD1!

I will say that DD1 had a nursing strike at this stage at just shy of ten months which we never resolved, and STILL never took a bottle. She just had whatever milk we could get in through her food and finally started drinking cows milk from a cup right around her birthday after much trying. She was and is fine. Part of me wouldn't mind if DD2 did the same and I didn't have to worry about weaning!

You’ll probably find she’s dropped a lot of those feeds naturally. For me, I went back to work when DC1 was 9 months and then again when DC2 was 12 months. At 9 months, I did express once a day (but he took a bottle) for the first few months but that was personal choice. He also fed a lot! My breasts just seemed to adjust after the first couple of days.

DC2 had naturally dropped quite a few feeds - tends to be first thing, maybe evening (he has a bottle at bedtime) and in the night, and the odd feed in the day around naps if at home. So physically it hasn’t been an issue for me at all.

Be warned that if your little one is a comfort feeder, she may “regress” and start asking for lots of feeds as a way of connecting when you start work. One of mine was a comfort feeder and one very business-like, and they both did this - lots of grabbing at my top and snack feeding.

It’s perfectly possible. I went back to work part time when dd was 10mo. She had food and water at nursery and sometimes cow milk from a sippy cup. I just fed her in the morning and as soon as we got home and when she woke overnight. On my days with her I fed her to sleep as normal. Never had an issue with supply or engorgement and didn’t have to express at work.

I went back when ds2 was 6 months.

Ds2 wasn't fussed about milk from a bottle (bm or formula, didnt matter) but he did fine with a big feed from me before I left and as soon as I got home, and water, yoghurt & other solids etc while I was away.

We would feed normally at the weekend and my supply adjusted fairly easily.

He did start waking again for feeds at night for a while which was a bit of a killer, but he was a lot younger than your wee one.

They also change so quickly so things may well be different by the time you go back.

Ds1 refused to breastfeed in the day and I could not express but women's breasts are amazing at adapting to demand and timings. My breast very rarely felt full but ds1 was certainly getting plenty of milk. I am sure your body will adapt although your dd may wake more at night.

I have the exact same situation! Starting nursery next month, 2 days a week, in advance of starting work in June (3 days pw) when my baby will be 10 months. I'm very nervous because I also have never successfully expressed. I feed on demand which is basically whenever, wherever. I got mastitis once, about a month ago, and it was dreadful! I don't want to risk that! And my working day plus long commute is 10-11 hours.

I think I'm going to try practising expressing as much as possible before June, aiming to express once a day while I'm out. My baby does take a bottle fine, thankfully, and I am happy for her to have formula alongside some solids, I'm just concerned about getting blockages from engorgement.

Following for tips!
Also, OP, let's share with each other how we get on please, I'm a bit nervous about it all! Hugs