To dream feed or not?

[Ggg1234]

Our 4 month old has had bath bottle bed routine for about two months between 6.30-8pm and we have always offered a dream feed at around 10-11pm. We stopped doing the dream feed about three weeks ago as he wouldn’t take it a few nights in a row and we also were too tired to stop up a couple of nights and we actually found it didn’t impact his night feed time at all. The problem is the last three nights, he’s woken up at about 11/11.30pm for a bottle. This just sets the night off badly as we will have only been asleep about an hour and then get woken up so feel terrible! He has had about 4oz (usually has 7oz bottles in the day) and won’t wake for another feed in the night after that (still has us up every hour it feels for every other reason). I could go to sleep earlier but my DH is unable to because of his shifts.

Do you think we should go back to offering the dream feed or just leave it?

Personally I wouldn’t be feeding a baby who is not hungry, it’s not very healthy and against nhs advice.

Maybe your DH could sleep in another room.

If I were you I’d go to bed earlier. You need to go to bed at a time that allows you to get enough sleep, that’s not necessarily at the same time as your DH.

It has a place if you bedshare, but I don't think it's very helpful if you don't.

@DinosaurDiana thank you yes when my husbands shifts allow it, I do try to get some extra sleep in. It’s more a question of whether to reintroduce a dream feed to eliminate a feed so soon after one of us has gone to sleep?

@Thatwentbadly I know what you mean, we’ve always tried to allow around four hours after his last feed so the likelihood is he is hungry and any times he has rejected it, we do not force it. I think in the early days before we’d formed a routine of any sort, we’d find he’d be waking up around half eleven anyway so it’s just a case of bringing this feed forward by half an hour or so to coincide with us going to sleep at a reasonable time. That’s why I’m wondering whether to go back to doing so given he’s woken up at that time the past three nights?

I’ve tried to insist he does but he won’t do out of principle (silly I know) but he doesn’t want me having to go it alone every night if things are hard