things i swore i'd never do as a parent but, er, did

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the other day i was watching a woman in a cafe pick up her baby and sniff its bum to see if the nappy needed changing and i suddenly realised that a) i used to think that was incredibly gross before i had kids and b)i now do it to DS all the time without thinking.
seem to remember also that DS was not going to watch television until he was 3 or something (he was all of 48 hours old when DH parked him in front of the football,IN HOSPITAL fgs)
soooo what parenting resolutions have you broken?

I was never going to put juice in a bottle

I was never going to smack(still dont ever want to do it again but have smacked dd2 twice and still feel bad about it)

Give in for the sake of a bit of peace and quiet

lick my finger and wipe their face

I was never going to lick a hankie/glove/finger and use it to wipe snot/breakfast/toothpaste etc etc off DSs face....but I do.

snap LVOC

bribe DS into good behaviour.

oh yes, I always thought the spit-wipe thing was gross but do it too

no shouting
no chocolate
No saying "Go and find something to do!"
No saying "mmmm hmmm" without looking - they always know it's a cop out
No dummies
No staying in pyjamas all day or allowing kids to do same
No more than one child

All broken

So many.....

C beebies when I'm cooking dinner unless dc1 wants to "help"

The occasional chocolate bar or teeth rotting sweets

The bum sniffing thing with both of em when babies(though dds usually announce their presence long before this is required,IYKWIM)

Yelling "In a minute" x 1000 at top volume most days.

Still using a bottle for dd though she is nearly 2 (she is SN and loves her bottle)

Letting ds jump around on my bed yelling at top volume

Doing the "Oh yes" half listening thing to dss endless stream of chatter (bad mummy)

Saying "I just DON'T KNOW" at the end of the day to dss' zillionth "Why" question (bad mummy)

Loads more I can't think of after a few glasses of wine

Message withdrawn

Repeating what they say, only as a question... "You want to play cars?...You want to read this one?" I annoyed myself so much.

Sticking a finger in a nappy to check if it's wet... sometimes disastrous.

Using my own spit to rub smears off dcs face. Bleurgh!

Letting them sit in front of the telly all afternoon sometimes if it raining and their bored ... I did say SOMETIMES ...

I'm sure there's many more.

Yeah how long have you got?

Of the top of my head, I was never going to:

let my children wear unmatching clothes or un-ironed clothes(how ignorant was I, now DS rumages through the ironing pile for anything to wear, never mind matching or ironed!!!)

threaten to throw toys away that where not tidied up

say "because I said so"

I was also never going to use the word 'naughty' but there just isn't any alternative sometimes!!

lol at your perfect little girls orinoco, I too was going to dress my girls in pretty frocked dresses with matching ribbons in their hair I have one very boyish DS though, who almost always looks like a little urchin!

Say any of the following:
'because I said so'

'I don't care if everyone else's mother lets them watch Eastenders/take poledancing classes/pick their nose at the table, we don't do it in this house'

'Oh FGS WHY can't you stop whinging, I'm trying to THINK'

Get up on A Sunday morning , go downstairs put TV on , go back to bed and leave them downstairs .

That they would never go to MacDonalds .

Tell them porkies to make them do things..e.g. If you don't use your legs for walking they will fall off

lol sleepdeprived...this is making me feel instantly better.
i was also going to keep going out of an evening and just take my charmingly behaved baby with me (three months of colic later i realised i hadnt been out since he was born...) dh was going to be some kind of victorian father and now is the one pleading for ds to be allowed in bed with us in the middle of the night...

Say, "If your friends jumped off a cliff, would you do it too?"

It backfired on me when after silent reflection 6yo dd replied, "Yes, I would jump off the cliff too. But I would use a rope tether."

I ended up buying the shoes she wanted because she actually gave me a reasonable answer. I only ever wailed "Mom its not fairrrrrrrrrrr" when she said it to me!

Bore them to submission having to listen to my fave (and v old fashioned) music. So much so, my DD2 thinks Queen are still in the charts!

My children were never going to play with plastic toys, just nice tasteful wooden ones - little did I know

They weren't going to watch tv/play computer games etc

My daughters would never be dressed head to toe in pink - I haddn't bargained for dd2.

LOL at BananaPudding. A friend of mine's dd wanted a particular pair of shoes because all her friends had them. My friend said "don't be such a sheep, dd" and dd replied "but surely we are all God's sheep and Jesus is our shepherd" so my friend had to give in and buy the shoes!

I swore I would be a young, trendy mum and that I wouldn't NAG over petty things.

Needless to say I nagged my daughter over the following before 8am this morning:

Put your tie on properly (does her tie in the 'cool' way i.e. 2 inches of fat kipper tie actually showing)

Brush your hair and put it up, do not spike with hair gel

Tuck your shirt in

Take all the crap out of your bag

Please wear your own knickers (parents of lovely small daughter, please be aware that when they get big enough they will nick ALL you underwear and socks)

Turn bloody Tracey Beaker off, it's sad

No, you can't have 2 quid

And so on and so on forever.

I seem to spend all my life nagging and blathering on about crap.

And she's not even a teenager yet.

Lots...especially the spit/wipe thing (though I do follow up with admitting I hated it when small too), along with bribes/threats in times of stress

Interestingly, there are heaps of things in this thread I'd never have thought of swearing not to do eg sniffing nappied bum, and others - such as saying 'I don't know' in answer to 'why?', when true - that I actually think are good!

I was never going to use dummies as I thought lazy people used them to shut their children up I didn't use one for my pfb dd but by the time ds came along I gave him a dummy mainly because I was lazy and wanted him to shut up.