Breastfeeding- what helped you?

[LouJ85]

Hi all.

I'm currently 33 weeks pregnant and very much hoping I can breastfeed my baby as I personally really want to.

Can anyone share any useful tips of things that helped to make their breastfeeding journey more of a success?

Thank you

Second time round I used breast shells and they were awesome to wear in your bra/top when you’re engorged to gently take a little milk off and reduce the swelling. They also get a bit of air to your nipples and stop the skin rubbing.

If the latch isn’t right, unlatch and start again. It can be frustrating at first, I cried a lot when I couldn’t get it right but if you don’t then your skin gets damaged and then it’s even more painful. Support pillow and trying different positions helps. I used nipple shields till about 6 weeks but only because my DC had tongue tie and my nipples were wrecked.

H&M nursing vests are brilliant, I wear these at night with a button up PJ top but they’re good for early days round the house too.

Kelly mom website is the oracle! Also this article really helped me, it helps your understand why the process and your babies needs change over time:

www.thealphaparent.com/timeline-of-a-breastfed-baby/

Never sit down to feed without having your phone/tv remote/drink and snack in reach.

If you think you have mastitis call the Dr ASAP so you can get started on antibiotics before your feel really unwell.

Those fussy evenings where it feels like they never stop feeding and your DH has to cut up your dinner don’t last forever.

After about 6 weeks it suddenly gets magically much easier!

Good luck OP, it’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done but super rewarding x

Doing an antenatal breastfeeding class. Try la leche league

Most of my advice is mentioned above.

I would also say having your partner on board supporting and encouraging you in the early days weeks is so important. I really wanted to EBF but in the early days it was quite uncomfortable and painful. feeling a little overwhelmed I had a few tears in the middle of the night, saying I don't think I can do this and worrying if my child was feeding ok. Having my partner calm me down and encourage me to keep going really helped me to persevere.

Then like magic the pain and discomfort goes away. It's amazing. From then on it was a beautiful experience. It's quick, easy and convenient. There are lots of private places to feed whilst out, in shopping centres, in the car etc. BF in public was fine, a muslin covered most of my skin and top of baby's head and I felt very discreet that way.

Good luck x

Kept going, constantly. Got checked by the midwives constantly. I think I asked about 8 (was in due to c section). It was easier to get help precovid. Also knew to look for tongue tie, asked, knew they'd missed it despitw this and did it privately myself.
Use a shot glass to lap from when had issues.

Then like magic the pain and discomfort goes away. It's amazing. From then on it was a beautiful experience.

This brought a tear to my eye. 🥺 Amazing. It makes me want to do it all the more.

Thank you all ladies for the inspiration and advice.

Colostrum harvesting worked really well for me. I had gestational diabetes and a difficult birth and I was unconscious with low blood pressure during the "golden hour" after the birth. My husband was able to syringe feed my baby with my colostrum and that made me feel a bit better about the fact I'd missed out on that time and not been able to give her the first feed. It also made me feel confident about my supply and comfortable with my own breasts.

Having said that, baby would have been just fine with formula and my situation wasn't typical anyway. So if you're not able to harvest any colostrum (or don't want to), it's not at all essential. It definitely made me feel more confident going into breastfeeding though, knowing I had a stash in hand in case it took a while to get established.

Info info info info!

Knowing where and how to identify GOOD QUALITY breastfeeding info and support is invaluable.

Find a couple of IBCLCs you like and follow them on social media. I'm currently following Lucy Ruddle and Lucy Webber. I'm sure other people can recommend others. Once you start following some of these types of people, you'll discover other resources and learn loads.

Facebook groups - eeeeh - can be good, can end up being a competitive thing, which is not always helpful. MN infant feeding board is OK, used to be brilliant 5-10 years ago. These days you can still get good advice/support on MN but sometimes it gets buried and posts get missed.

You want a source of good evidence/experience based support. Sometimes unfortunately, NHS support is incomplete or the knowledge/experience isn't necessarily there. NHS staff get very little training on BF (unless your area employs any IBCLCs - this is a highly renowned qualification) and may not have sufficient time with each patient to have built up the kind of experience that translates into good long-term support or advice.

Other free sources of support:
La Leche League
NCT
Association of Breastfeeding Mothers
Baby Café
National Breastfeeding Helpline

These sources may have groups (virtual and/or physical) in your area, helplines, or supporters you can contact remotely.

Hi OP

I’m feeding my 7.5 month old. My top tips are:

• your partners support will be crucial. I’m sure babies can sense when you’re about to do something and decide they need to feed then (cooking/eating dinner being a prime example!). Your partner will have to shoulder more of the house stuff and cooking in the early days if he wants either of you to eat. He can’t breastfeed the baby but he can feed you and do the hoovering!

• make sure you know where to go for help before you need it. Check now that you have your HVs number saved in your phone, there’s a breastfeeding helpline number on the front of your notes - save it in your phone. If you’re looking for private support at any time make sure it’s an IBCLC. They are the most qualified and it’s very hard to become one so they are the best. Find support groups near you (a lot of these are online at the moment)

• read up about normal behaviour and how to tell they’re getting enough. Sometimes during cluster feeds your boobs will feel absolutely empty but they aren’t! Make sure you know about cluster feeding, how many nappies you should be expecting at each stage. It’s easy to doubt yourself when you’re knackered.

• it’s not advised to pump at all before 6 weeks as you can cause over supply which is a fast track to mastitis and a gassy/uncomfortable baby. If you do pump after this your pump output is no indication of how much your baby gets. Some people respond better than others to a pump (I personally cannot get a single drop) but babies feeding method is different and usually more efficient.

• if in doubt whip it out. Feeding will solve about a hundred different things and only one of them is hunger. Feeding can be for comfort, to ease reflux pain, to help get a fart out, to help go to sleep and lots of other things. Pretty much any time baby isn’t happy in the early stages offer a boob, it’s like a magic power that fixes almost everything!

• prolonged pain isn’t normal, get help from a professional!

• not all professionals know anything about breastfeeding. Sadly this includes some midwives and health visitors. Do your research before hand so you know when you’re being fobbed off and don’t be afraid to get a second opinion if something doesn’t feel right.

• it’s a steep learning curve initially and both you and baby have to learn but once you crack it it’s so easy you can literally do it in your sleep (check out the safe 7 on the lullaby trust if you think you’re tired enough that you’ll fall asleep feeding!)

I went into BF thinking I’d give it a go but sack it off if I didn’t like it. I can honestly say it’s one of the most rewarding things I have ever done.

I found it really hard but I was so bloody determined to do it. Ended up doing it for 20 months. My tips to you:

• join your local La Leche League group on Facebook, it's great for support from other mums in the same boat and its volunteers will give you support with latch and positioning etc. Think it's via zoom at the mo
• Read up as much as you can, I wish I had known about tongue tie sooner, how to clear blocked ducts etc
• if you have your latch checked and deemed okay by a professional but you are still in pain then definitely seek support from someone who is IBCLC qualified (there's a list online), doing this privately was worth the money for me
• be aware that you will be solely responsible for all feeds, unless you are able to express and want to give baby a bottle. I don't think I realised how hard the sleep deprivation from 3-4 feeds per night would be, but it does get better
• invest in some soft bamboo reusable Breast pads and some Multi mam compresses. I didn't rate lansinoh but the compresses were ace

Hope this doesn't put you off, OP. I seemed to have a particularly hard time of it after a missed tongue tie and misdiagnosed cows milk protein allergy by my health visitor. I am so proud that I got through it but wish I had known the above before I started. Probably my best ever achievement.

I spent ages researching in pregnancy all sorts of BF issues and troubleshoots so I'd have a good background base of info.

In terms of my own experience:

In hospital if you do not feel comfortable get a lactation specialist to check your latch. Do not be afraid to ask again and again or different people.

Stock up on nipple cream (lansinoh or weleda are good)

Stock up on nipple compresses. My goodness did they help me when mine were raw in the early weeks.

I know everyone says it shouldn't be painful but it was for me and we're still BF now with a baby that's gained weight well. I think in certain circumstances you should expect some pain tbh. I have (had) flat nipples and DD struggled to latch but over time she has broken/weakened the nipple adhesions so they stick out more! But my god the process was excruciating.

If you can help it don't pump too much in the early days unless you're worried about supply. I did because my DD lost weight and I was topping her up but it meant I had oversupply and v painful lumpy boobs.

Don't go mad in terms of expecting your baby to feed perfectly for 15 mins each side. No word of a lie, I spent hours researching as my DD wouldn't feed for more than 3-5 mins on each side between ages of 2 weeks to currently 6 months but I shouldn't have panicked as we have been weighing her regularly and she is gaining v well.

Expect to be BF a lot in the early days and don't expect your baby to be sticking to recommended feeding schedules. DD still feeds every 2 hrs as she's a snacker even though at 6m apparently they only feed 6-8 times 🙄

Another vote for the multi mam compresses. Expensive but worth it. Also jump on a blocked duct quickly to avoid mastisis - loads of feeding, massage and heat.

For me I didn't struggle physically so much as mentally with the exhaustion and claustrophobia of never being able to miss a feed. Some of my friends swapped the evening feed for a bottle of formula for a break- but they seemed to be the ones who quickly struggled with supply. So if you are keen to establish breastfeeding I think it is important not to miss a feed / at least pump that feed particularly in the early weeks, but that can be so hard when tired.

I found all the hard work worth it, when I could wander around in the summer for long walks and not worry about getting back because I hadn't brought milk. Seeing friends struggle with getting a bottle at the right temperature on a hot day in the park while I could just whip out a boob. Not needing to worry about dehydration when baby had diarrhea as he just cluster fed and the milk adapted to his needs. So I think an eye on the long game is mentally super helpful.

Read " the womanly art of breastfeeding" la leche league book and " the positive breastfeeding book" . Really gave me a realistic expectation that the first few weeks can be tough but soo worth it when you both crack it and feel comfortable. My baby has a slight tongue tie that was never snipped and I had pain until about 8 weeks but then suddenly it stopped overnight! I think perhaps sometimes your nipples just need to toughen up. Breastfeeding is wonderful , yes it's tough at the beginning but when you're a few months in and your baby pulls off your boob to give you a big smile it's beautiful. Breastfeeding is not just about feeding you can settle your baby, comfort them, connect with them and give them the best start in life. My experience with breast pumps: I had the bellababy and always struggled to get much out but more recently invested in a Medela and it's soo much better. Before you buy a pump search online how to get right size flange as that was my problem.

A private lactation consultant, Lanisoh cream and nipple shields. I wish I’d got private help with my first son. When the second baby was probing just as hard, I went straight for help. It was money well spent.

Breast shields and nipple cream pack both in your hospital bag.

Also when baby born ask for it to be checked for tongue tie- I knew what to look for and it was confirmed and fixed within days which helped as he couldn’t latch

Look at the different techniques - nipple to nose, rugby ball etc

Don’t be scared to ask for help my first baby knew exactly what to do, my second it was a real struggle had health visitor send breast feeding specialist over to help me a few times then we got it and breast fed for almost 2 years

All the stuff here. Particularly I’d emphasis the part about it being more than a full time job at first. I added up the time I spent feeding in the first weeks and it was upwards of 9 hrs actual feeding time per 24 hrs, for a good few weeks. So I did nothing really but that and try to sleep and rest in between. So make no plans and settle in. Anything else is a bonus.

Read " the womanly art of breastfeeding" la leche league book and " the positive breastfeeding book" .

I've just started reading the positive breastfeeding book - so far so good.

@Orangedaisy

All the stuff here. Particularly I’d emphasis the part about it being more than a full time job at first. I added up the time I spent feeding in the first weeks and it was upwards of 9 hrs actual feeding time per 24 hrs, for a good few weeks. So I did nothing really but that and try to sleep and rest in between. So make no plans and settle in. Anything else is a bonus.

Wow it sounds very full on - but definitely better for me to know what I'm letting myself in for...

Agree with pp! The biggest thing for me being a first time mum, was not being able to get my head around the fact that no matter what I did during the early stages of breastfeeding it always hurt. And guess what - the latch was fine and my baby was feeding brilliantly! It's just a goddamn myth that even for some bizarre reason midwives to this day still hold onto, that if it hurts your not doing it right which is NOT the case at all ugh!!!

The big difference is it will get to a point where it doesnt hurt anymore, and become an enjoyable bonding experience. Perseverance is key! Like you I also really wanted to bf so didnt let any cracked nipples, bleeding or discomfort stop me. Just push through trust me it's so rewarding once you come out the other end of it.

Also this may not be a common thing but my newborn vomited up fresh blood once in her milk, like specks. Turns out if you have cracked nipples it can get into their system dont fret it's totally harmless. Bring it up to your hv or midwife and they will check your nipples for trauma.

Lastly nipple cream!!! Oh my goodness it is a game changer and life saviour. Especially during those early painful days, it helped heal my nipples and keep them in one piece.

Lansinoh nipple cream is amazing, baby can eat straight off the application and is great lip balm! Also their breast pads (comes with two sticky patches to stop them wondering in the bra) super thin super absorbent. Expensive but worth it.

Hope that helped op and wishing you a smooth birth

First time I struggled to get started and this time I did antenatal colostrum harvesting which meant I had a stash of colostrum and it was flowing readily by the time I had my baby.

Using a breastfeeding pillow (at least at the beginning) and changing positions with that support - rugby ball position was useful to us in the first instance due to tongue tie.

Lansinoh cream - certainly the first time though I haven't been as consistent this time around. I believe cabbage leaves are also great but I always forget to get them.

Good support network - my husband is fully on board with my desire to breastfeed and - whilst he would have totally supported me if I decided to combi or switch to formula - he has never suggested it. He just did whatever he could to help. My parents are also v supportive - and I've never had a negative word from strangers either.

Breastfeeding peer support was also great - you can access it online now though I did 1-2-1 before lockdown. This kept me informed about things like clusterfeeding which, before accessing that support, I'd mistakenly thought meant I had poor milk supply. Knowing that what's happening is totally normal is a great comfort!

A sister who was breastfeeding, a mum who had breastfed.

The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding.

A visit from a lactation consultant.

H&M maternity/breastfeeding vests.

When I stopped over complicating things, no timing, measuring, pumping etc. Just fed the babies at the breast.

Knowing that a painful latch is normal or at least common at the beginning and that it gets better.

There was this thing, biological nurturing. It’s a sort of head bobbing thing new born babies can do. It’s very weird but once you have seen it, it does help. Try and find a video. The book is short.
www.biologicalnurturing.com/pages/downloadarticles.html

There is a book called “the womanly art of breastfeeding”. You read the first part before your baby comes. It’s good. Not perfect but very good. The last third of the book is problem solving but it covers a lot to a basic level.

Another tip, one of my aunts was a breastfeeding support person in Glasgow. She was good to talk to when I had problems. I also paid for a lactation consultant when I was really in need of help. She was brilliant. I really understood my options after speaking to her. She gave me a few different solutions to help.

My main bit of advice is that most people haven’t breastfed. Some people don’t even like it and will give your their opinions. Even doctors and midwives don’t really know about it. We aren’t used to seeing women breastfeed and we don’t get to share knowledge in the real sense. So bear that in mind. You almost have to be a bit bloody minded about it and only get help from people who know about breastfeeding and don’t have their own bad experiences/unique views.

I had an appointment with a GP, I was desperate. He was male, he didn’t really help. Went to a breast consultant (lump) he told me I should be at home snuggling the baby. But I couldn’t as I was suffering from a blocked duct!!!! He was very kind and I still would go to him. Ultimately the lactation consultant sorted me out. Basically I am saying certain people will help you more but you have to find them.

Talk to your family and your partners family about what they think about breastfeeding. Forewarned is forearmed. This helps when people say things because you know their bias.

Good luck! Everything you do helps. First child it was hard. Second straightforward. You can do this. There are always solutions.

Support groups and cafes, for getting used to feeding out and about.

Persistence, telling every midwife and health visitor and bf supporter, till his tongue tie was finally diagnosed and treated after 10 painful weeks. It was worth it!

Currently feeding my 6 month old to sleep and it's the perfect time to be on my phone, although sometimes I just look at him! He's about to start weaning but it's an amazing feeling knowing I, exclusively, have grown him to the 9kg he is now!
I would say just remember it's a skill that both of you need to learn and practice. I was in the boat that thought it came naturally. There's lots of help out there and it was helpful to know a couple of holds and tips before he was born, but also I'd checked out in advance the local lactation consultant or who is doing tongue tie snips just in case I wanted help in the early blurry days. Other than that I read something that stuck with me; never decide to quit on a bad day, always wait another day and see how you feel. That got me through some cluster feeds or sleepless nights when I realised the problem was tiredness or lack of self care rather than breastfeeding itself. I love it now!
Supportive partner is very necessary. I had also batch cooked loads in the freezer and had some big 2L water bottles in and lots of treats for the early days it was great! I also invested in some lovely seraphine nursing PJs that were smart enough for when we had visitors but really really discreet for feeding and they were hanging ready for when I arrived home and had a nice hot shower and washed the hospital grub off!
All the very best for the next few weeks!

I got a big muslin (1m X 1m) and used it as a cover when bf in public. At the very start I had sore nipples and used lanolin, which helped so much. Only use a tiny bit - I still have most of a tube left!

It feels like a lot of work at first as no-one can really help with feeds, but it takes so much hassle out of life with a baby in reality. No sterilising bottles, no worries about formula going off or having to make it up when out, and you always have what you need on hand!

This sounds weird to explain but I had some nipple pain especially on the right for the first few months. I could not understand why and I went to the gp who agreed my nip was inflamed. I thought it could be thrush or something but wasn’t sure. My gp didn’t help much.

Anyway I saw online a positioning diagram which showed to tuck the baby’s lower arm under your armpit and around your side by making sure they were sticking their arms forward like superman. I had been tucking his arm back on itself against me/my tummy which meant he wasn’t close enough to me to latch properly.

Anyway it fixed the problem and I wished I’d realised sooner. I’m still feeding now at 16 months.