Hubby likes assigning tasks

[Confusionoverload]

Our baby (3yr old) visits her grand parents every other day (hubby and I work full time). every time my husband drops them off, he asks for their help to read for her, teach her abcs- telling them we have been negligent in that field (which is not true) and ask that they work with her on normal toddler behavioral issues. I’m angry because this is the parents’ responsibility. Last night, he suggested that I should not worry about combing my baby’s hair and that his mother will comb it. Anybody have similar experience?

Well clearly you have strong feelings about this but it sounds like he is happy for these things to happen at the grand parents.
Firstly i would say talk to him about it, he may not realise your strength of feeling.
Secondly try to get on the same page with behaviour, you do want to be consistent with them, maybe he feels like they are spoiling your child and is trying to get them on side with behaviour.
I think through an open conversation you can solve the problems together. Good luck!

Anybody have similar experience. No and I find it a bit odd. I've always looked on free childcare as just that, they are there just to have filing with DGPs and it's free. If his assessment of them is that they are failing perhaps it's time for him to look into paid childcare.

It's tricky to comment on this - I can see it from both sides. As the grandparents see a lot of the child, I do think it's reasonable to suggest things about how they spend their time with her, how they respond if she behaves badly etc. If she went to nursery those days instead, it would be natural to have similar conversations with the nursery staff. It's not the same situation as if she saw her grandparents only on short visits with her parents present too. The combing thing is weird though!

Is your relationship with your DH good in other respects?

@Confusionoverload

Our baby (3yr old) visits her grand parents every other day (hubby and I work full time). every time my husband drops them off, he asks for their help to read for her, teach her abcs- telling them we have been negligent in that field (which is not true) and ask that they work with her on normal toddler behavioral issues. I’m angry because this is the parents’ responsibility. Last night, he suggested that I should not worry about combing my baby’s hair and that his mother will comb it. Anybody have similar experience?

If she’s with them every other day then of course they have to fulfil a parental role. You can’t use them for so much childcare and then make them delegate things.