Help me break free of using a breathing monitor!

[helpmeoutMN]

Name changed.

My child is nearly 2.5 and is still sleeping on a breathing monitor. DC was a few weeks early hence getting this in the first place (absolutely all my idea to get it, no medical reason or doctor suggestion) - we had only a couple of hours in NICU, no resuscitation or anything like that needed at birth but clearly I'm hung up about something for keeping this flipping monitor going for over 2 years now.

I think it's become a habit more than anything else but I really want to stop feeling like I have to use it.

Any tips?!

Are you anxious in any other areas of your life? Is it doing any harm to leave the monitor there? Are you always watching and listening?

What stops you, you know, just stopping? Getting rid of it? You must realise, logically, than the days of SIDS, as it were, are long behind you.

Yes I definitely am an overthinking so can get anxious. I don't use the monitor for the daytime nap nor when DC is asleep between her bedtime and ours - literally just overnight as the unit reaches to our room and flashes to indicate movement. DH says it's past it's use by date now (which is true) so likely to lose sensitivity soon.

*overthinker

Are you lying awake at night listening?
If so, perhaps talk to your health visitor because that’s detrimental to your health.

Otherwise, if you’re basically using it as belt and braces, like a smoke alarm, I don’t see a problem.

Has your child moved into a big bed yet? If not, maybe use that as the cut off?

Nope - I sleep through as it's a comfort thing I guess? She's still in a cot, will def have to bin it when this turns into a toddler bed (no signs of that needing to happen yet though).

Deep down I know she's absolutely fine and I'm being silly but can't break the habit

Does she still nap? Maybe try removing it for nap time, at first? Then work up to removing altogether?

What is a breathing monitor? It's not something placed on her face is it??

I have a Kodak baby monitor which I can see my boy on and we use it every night and nap although I am starting to just not use it. My husband is more the one who wants to use it but I'm like "he's 18m, I can hear him through the wall of he cries"... We kinda become dependent on this stuff. It's not really required now. Think what parents did before all these gadgets!

In which case, I can personally see no harm to anyone whatsoever. Do what makes you feel secure.

Proviso: she may object when she’s 13 😁

If it is helping you get a good nights sleep I can't see any reason to stop using it.
It's not causing you or your DC any distress.
We used one with both of my 2 and only stopped using it when they moved about the cot so much it was going off all the time.

I used one until my DC was 5. I don’t see a problem with it.

Don’t stress about it op. I had a baby monitor in dds room until she was probably around 6 as she has epilepsy. I don’t think we ever heard her have a seizure through it but it gave peace of mind and you can never have enough peace of mind

Set a date in your mind then remove it.

Spend the first few nights sleeping badly and checking her multiple times until you get used to it not being there would be my suggestion. I don’t mean this unkindly or to minimise your worries or anxiety, this is just what I did with mine. As soon as I removed them I listed them on eBay and sold them quickly. It was horrible at first, but now they’re gone I don’t miss them (it helps that mine wriggle all over the place and kept setting them off).

When I looked I could find no evidence that a breathing monitor has EVER saved a baby’s life. Does that help?

A breathing monitor won't save a babies life no however when I listen to the beeping I know that my baby is alive. If anything was to happen I would like to think that I made some form of effort to help baby. The thought of a baby being put to bed without a monitor and dying and not being found until morning makes me feel sick. Yes I know the risks are low, yes I know I'm being irrational. Cannot help it. We've never had false alarms and I plan on using mine for as long as possible