Uncuddly baby

[Leadust92]

My daughter is 20 weeks old and just doesn’t like cuddles :( she will let me hold her upright walking around and hold her for feeds and playing but she no longer falls asleep on my arms and will cry when tired until I put her down. She won’t be held ‘like a baby’ and buckaroos if I or anyone else try to hold her like that. Until she was about 2 months old she would fall asleep on my chest and lay on me but no more! She smiles lots , babbles away to us and is pleasant but I really want cuddles! Just wondering if this is normal and she will grow to want cuddles or if it’s just her personality.

My 9 month old DD is exactly like this - she absolutely hates when I try to cuddle her, she just fights to get out my arms

Never thought I’d miss the days when she’d only sleep on me!

This is probably very unhelpful but I’m stooped like a goddamn hunchback thanks to DD 6 months who won’t nap anywhere except my arms and I’d say having a baby who only wants naps in arms is probably as stressful as a baby who doesn’t, but for very different reasons

I've had 2 cuddly babies, and one who was SO awkward. Just always ram rod straight and never snuggled in. But now aged 3, my awkward baby is the most cuddly. Always wanting to be wrapped up in my arms. So things may change!

My son at 8 years old is still doesnt really do cuddles. Its just not his thing however he also had reflux as a baby and when he was suffering had to be held over my shoulder.

My eldest was a very uncuddly baby, even as a newborn! Never fell asleep on me, even my HV found her peculiar 😂 DD was a very awake, alert & not sleepy baby!

She’s 3.5 now & very loving and affectionate. She hugs those she loves & cuddles up to watch a film. That said, she very much likes her personal space. I’ve never been able to cuddle her to sleep or share a bed. She only sleeps when in her own bed, no touching from anyone! When watching a film, she’ll cuddle initially & then move away to sit in her own space. Interestingly, I’m a bit like that too. I absolutely need my own space!

My non cuddly baby turned cuddly at 3

My baby who’s now 8 months is cuddly and I’m enjoying the baby cuddles but also more worried about handing over to childcare when the time comes for naps etc

Exactly the same here OP! She's 4 months and hates being held like a baby unless it's for feeds! Sometimes she falls asleep in my arms if I put a dummy in but other than that, doesn't like to be held unless she wants to be upright on my shoulders. She's still a smiley happy baby though, just wants to grow up fast (too fast in my opinion!!)

A baby who wants to self settle? Could make you a fortune op!!

I had an uncuddly one- now 9 to and still very self possessed. She also has a high metabolism and hates getting too hot, so cuddles have a point where they are too much, which we noticed as a baby and still fits. This is something I would love to have!

She is so clearly happy with who she is, never had a tantrum, doesn't take things too personally. She has coped much better with lockdown than her higher needs, cuddlier siblings and friends. I remember worrying about it when she was younger but as time goes on I see it as a strength. She has good friendships, she's just undemanding, it's not a bad thing if it's just how they're made.

Ahh good to hear all your experiences!
My baby is very smiley and I know she loves us and I’m very grateful she can self settle, especially at night. But I just want to feel wanted by her sometimes. (Selfish) x

From a couple of months old ds was very uncudley. He actually cried until I put him down if I tried to rock him to sleep! It's quite a blessing in disguise as he learned to self settle really quickly and has always slept through the night since. He's almost 16 months now and is very affectionate in his own way and will come across and give me random hugs and kisses but he's still not a laying on my chest under a blanket kind of guy. Think there's just far too much for him to do 😁. He's clearly very loving though and loves being played with though so I've got no worries about our bond!

My 15 month old has been like this since very early on. She's very independent and doesn't like to be cuddled unless it's on her terms. The positive of this is that she's never been clingy or been a baby who has to to be held or rocked to sleep. The negatives is that I don't get cuddles ever.

My DS was like this. He would only ever want to be upright and looking about to see what was going on. We tried to see the funny side!