My 4 year old is causing me a lot of confusion and hurt. I am confused as to whether her behaviour is unacceptable or mine is.
She has always been more wilful and bossy than her brother. Feom the moment she wakes up there is an issue. For example this morning it was “I want different pyjamas on.” I ask why and she says these are too small. Even though they are not. So I change her pyjamas.
We go down for breakfast. She is always awake for about 1 hour before her 9 year old brother. She eats her breakfast, which is a sandwich and jam as she will refuse anything else.
I wake her brother and he comes down. He asks to put something they both like on the tv. I agree and she says “no watch mummy’s phone”. I ask her to put something on they both like, she says no then screams when I change the channel. They both like a few programs so I’m not being unreasonable.
Then getting ready. It is snowing and freezing. She demands a dress with see through tights. I say no as it’s too cold. We have a fight every morning about what she wears. We’re in lockdown and no nursery. She goes to my mums whilst I work. Yesterday she was out sledging and my mum said that after 5 mins she cried and screamed to go home as she was too cold, they all had to go home.
I reminded her about this but still she refused. I had to force her to wear a warm top and trousers. I left the room to return to her naked and trying to get her flimsy light dress on.
After much screaming and crying I got the trousers and top on and the dress on top. She looks ridiculous but atleast warmer. She was red blotchy and miserable as I dropped her off. I feel awful and like crying myself.
Am I in the wrong? Is she in the wrong? I am at breaking point. I now have an 8 hour day ahead of me but feel so awful that she’s away with that repeated memory of us trying to get dressed.