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Parenting

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Original poster

If you have a dd at primary who has periods, I've got a couple of questions

16 replies

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 04/02/2021 17:52

My dd is 9 and is showing signs of her periods starting (cramping on a regular monthly basis and for the last three months has had one instance each month of there being a little blood when she wipes after a pee).

She is fully aware of periods/why we have them/etc. However I wondered about the following:-

If she is still at Primary when she properly starts do I put in a quick call to school? I assume she will want to take extra loo breaks and will need to bring in a little bag (current covid restrictions they are only allowed a coat and a water bottle on daily). Or do the school keep a supply for students - which I would be happy to keep stocked up for them.

Pain management concerns me. I suffer with sever ovulation pains which are worse than my actual period pain, and I want to be prepared in case she also gets this. Is Calpol sufficient for a 9yo but who is going through puberty? I'm not sure she would take tablets. We always have hot water bottles on the go so she can use that but when I'm at my worst they don't help on their own.

If you've had a 9/10yo start theirs, how did they/you find it? I was mentally preparing for this being a Secondary School thing - which is easier to sort as they carry a backpack round all day and, well, it's just expected at 11/12 onwards. Not Year4!

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DuaLipaSuction · 04/02/2021 19:08

Oh poor little love. I haven't got any experience of periods this early but if you ask @MNHQ to move this over to the Preteens Section, I'm sure you'll get a few responses

CatsForLife · 04/02/2021 19:13

Maybe consider period pants for her. ModiBodi are fab.

Dollygirl2008 · 04/02/2021 19:17

Hi my daughter started when she was just ten. I didn't let the school know because she asked me not to, but I would in your position if they still have bag regulations when they go back. Try calpol meltlets for any period pain but she might be lucky!

Also, another vote for period pants - particularly Modibodi. They are LIFE CHANGING!!!! They technically don't need any other form of protection but my daughter had the boy pant style and still wore a pad for extra protection. It also meant that if she didn't have the opportunity to change, it didn't matter (she didn't want any friends to know). Honestly / they're expensive but I'd pay double if I had to - they are that great! I also recommend the swimming bottoms

Good luck! She'll be fine. My DD is 12 now and an old hand at it!!!!

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9 year olds Families General parenting Primary education

Stretchandsnap · 04/02/2021 19:19

DD started and I got her some modibodi pants - they work brilliantly and are virtually unnoticeable. I wanted to discretely let her lovely teacher know just so she could go to the loo when needed but DD has ADH and wouldn’t have it (very very private about me talking about her to anyone - even her dad!)
She has a little bag of just in case pants and pads to keep in her school bag but I have to say she has coped brilliantly (I was dreading it)

AshenQueen · 04/02/2021 19:24

My DD was 10 when she started. I don’t think I informed school (she’s 13 now), but I think I did ask her if she wanted me to let her teacher know so that she could have extra breaks etc and she said no. She took a pencil case with her own sanitary products in it and wore clothes with pockets for subtly transporting to the bathroom. I made sure she always had plenty in there so she was never stuck for them.

I suffer from a lot of symptoms, including pain too, so I was worried about the same. DD isn’t affected as much, although she’s slightly anaemic and has to take iron tablets. She gets headachy and sometimes a sore back, for which I give her paracetamol, but that didn’t start till around a year after she started her period.

At first she took it really well, I was quite shocked, but over time she started to have issues with san pro and wouldn’t use it, which eventually came to a head, when she broke down and asked me if there was anything that could just make her periods stop. We had a heart to heart, she changed products and since then she’s been absolutely fine (albeit quite moody when she’s on them!!). If I could go back, I’d have given her more options for san pro to start off with instead of just pads or nothing, I feel bad about that.

It can be quite a difficult thing for them to deal with when they are younger I think, but overall it hasn’t affected DD so much that she’s still struggling with it.

DiscoStusMoonboots · 04/02/2021 19:25

Year 6 teacher here. You'll likely find the school has a supply of STs - we keep them in a specific toilet for the children to access without the need to ask.

In my experience, parents will often take you to one side in the morning to explain that they have started, just to avoid any embarrassment for the girls. That way, the teacher and the child have an understanding when it comes to needing extra toilet time. Teachers get this all the time, so please tell your daughter not to be worried or embarrassed when the time comes.

Lulu1919 · 04/02/2021 19:43

A quick email to the teacher maybe ..up to your child
Ask her if disposal bins in the loos....if not I'd ask the school
Our have them from Year four upwards

mootymoo · 04/02/2021 19:50

It will vary but pre covid, girls could use the staff toilets on their period, they could leave a bag in the office with supplies at the school I helped in. I doubt she will need extra loo breaks as it's never more than a couple of hours between breaks at primary. Please don't assume she will be in pain either, in 35 years of periods I've never needed pain relief - hopefully she will be like that!

stormelf · 04/02/2021 20:02

The primary school I used to teach in had sanitary supplies in one set of staff toilets which the girls were allowed to use. We kept them well stocked but the office also had a supply for anyone needing them. I don't know if that is the same in all schools but was how we did it.

GADDay · 04/02/2021 20:08

No need for pads/tampons. My DD started age 9. Modibodi period pants were a marvel!

She is now 14 and I have just bought her a mooncup. No waste, less washing & mess.

Original poster

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 04/02/2021 21:45

Brilliant idea on the period pants! I have a mooncup and dd knows what it is and how it works so I'd hope if she ever fancies trying one of her own she will ask - though I assume that's a couple of years off.

She also knows where the pads and panty liners are incase she thinks she needs one. But the specific pants will be ideal. I will certianly order her some.

OP posts:

modgepodge · 04/02/2021 21:48

Year 6 teacher here too - we have a supply of pads in school but it’s really for emergencies, we would expect the girls to bring their own normally (private school here so period poverty not a concern - perhaps in more deprived areas it might be different).

I’ve had a few parents email me to let me know in the past. Equally I've had tall, well-developed girls have a note for some sort of spurious injury/illness to get them off swimming once a month, who haven’t told me they’ve started, so I assume not everyone does tell the teacher. I’d see what your daughter wants to do.

Some girls in my class have a little make up bag or pencil case with pads, spare pants etc in.

I’d say it’s worth checking if the y4 toilets have sanitary bins in and if not what they suggest she does. Only our y6 toilets have them. Also it might sound silly but make sure your daughter knows what they are and how to use them! I had a parent email to check if had them as her daughter had started and was confused about how they were used so she wanted to check they were standard style ones!!

latercalculator · 08/02/2021 12:07

Hi, I just wanted to pitch in and say that the DfE has funded schools to have access to free period products for students throughout primary, secondary and college. There are reusable products too - including washable pads and the Mooncup. www.phs.co.uk/about-phs/period-poverty/

Original poster

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 08/02/2021 12:26

[quote latercalculator]Hi, I just wanted to pitch in and say that the DfE has funded schools to have access to free period products for students throughout primary, secondary and college. There are reusable products too - including washable pads and the Mooncup. www.phs.co.uk/about-phs/period-poverty/[/quote]
That's excellent!

OP posts:

sherrystrull · 08/02/2021 12:46

I would drop the school an email and ask their policy. My school tell parents about a designated member of staff in each class who can discretely help if needed. I'm sure they will be very helpful and support your dd with what she needs. Good luck

TheFormidableMrsC · 08/02/2021 12:55

My DD started at 8 and yes I let the school know. I made sure she had a little zipped bag with sanpro/wipes/bags/spare knickers in her school bag at all times. Calpol was initially sufficient, eventually she moved to Feminax. We didn't have period pants then but that is what I'd use now. Much easier all round.

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