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Parenting

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Original poster

How did you bring dh around to the idea of a second?

4 replies

Lelophants · 04/02/2021 14:45

He's very much saying no atm as finds it so hard 😂 it is hard, but I still feel like it's worth it! (He's 15 months). He says he wants another one day, but would also be happy to leave it if I would be happy with one. He'd be sad to only have 1 as he always wanted 2, but says he'd want it to be a lot 'easier' before it feels worth it.

I'm early 30s and conceiving ds was fine but I know the clock will be ticking. He's 15 months and has never really slept. 🤷‍♀️
I think dh is still a tad traumatised from the labour and one of his friends said 2 is more than double the work! So he's nervous.

Experiences?

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DuaLipaSuction · 04/02/2021 19:12

I think I convinced him that it wasn't much more work getting up for two than it is for one and that in the long term, I think that big age gaps can be harder work.

We both have over 5 year gaps with our siblings so he did agree on that one.

Original poster

Lelophants · 04/02/2021 19:40

@DuaLipaSuction

I think I convinced him that it wasn't much more work getting up for two than it is for one and that in the long term, I think that big age gaps can be harder work.

We both have over 5 year gaps with our siblings so he did agree on that one.

And how was it in reality? Was there a point where he was just "ok then "

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HappierTimesAhead · 04/02/2021 19:45

I am pregnant again and we have a 2.5 DS. My DP was pretty against having a second as we both found the baby stage so hard. What seemed to start to change his mind was seeing DS growing into a little person and playing on his own. I think he felt a bit sorry for him and wanted him to have company. Plus the sleep deprivation was becoming a bit of a distant memory. Having said that, he is now getting panicky because the baby will be here soon

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DuaLipaSuction · 04/02/2021 19:47

We'd both discussed age gaps and I think it was both f our experiences of having a bigger gap that persuaded him, if I remember it was around 18 months that we started trying. That pg didn't work out and we ended up with a 3 year gap. I would of liked a smaller gap but it was nice having the older one go to preschool did some of the days and just having a bit of time with the baby.

I couldn't persuade him to have a third though

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