18m old constantly asking for food

[Zoink]

So I know many chn ask for food all day every day up until older! Our 18m old eats a big breakfast, lunch and dinner (and I mean portion sizes of an 8 year old!! They then have five portions of fruit as snacks etc etc. They constantly ask for food and are always trying to get to the fridge. They also scoff food when they eat like an animal 😂 so I guess they aren't filling up until they've eaten double or triple what they should!

I have no worry - yes they are chubby but that's fine - but I just am wondering if I make food more available so they can have more in the day, what's the best food to be eating a lot of? Are there certain fruits that shouldn't be eaten too much etc? They are starting to now cry (fake cry) for food and even when I am bringing food out to them, they cry with frustration that it isn't in their mouth straight away!

[quote EmmaOvary]@Cormoran I'm a little shocked at all the cakes given for 'goûter'. Seems like unnecessary sugar but it's the same in France. [/quote]
Tbh, the French philosophy is a simple and excellent one:

-food at set times only, no ad hoc snacking, or eating due to boredom, or placating or bribing with food.
-sugar is not a "bad" food, a small piece of cake is a reasonable part of a balanced diet, not a treat or anything to feel guilty about.

@EmmaOvary that's true, but then nobody talks or considers sugars/macro/carbs.... there isn't this nutrients obsession.

We are however violently against processed food and snacking (grignotage is considered a crime!) . People like their patisseries. There are small . If you buy un millefeuille or une tartelette in a shop, they are tiny, 3 bites.

You have an afternoon snack, le 4 heures, always sweet, a couple of biscuits, a petit pain au chocolat from the bakery, or fruit (but peaches and apricots have a different taste than the ones you find UK/Australia) in the summer and then nothing until 7.30-8. The toddlers and babies would leave the creche and then eat nothing until dinner.

Everyone talks about the French paradox and I include Monaco in it, we eat fresh food, not industrial food, and nobody snacks, especially adults. We eat croissants from time to time, so full of butter it stains the paper bag, but the croissant comes from the bakery round the corner, not a supermarket shelf.

Nobody eats celery or carrots between meals, or hummus. Or nuts. And party food (crisps, savoury crackers, ...) is a big no. We don't eat them, because nobody eats between meals, full stop.

The key with having real meal for lunch is the seasonality. You don't eat the same thing all year round. You would have soups in winter, salads in summer. Vegetables that are roasted, mashed, dressed in salads (carottes râpées with fresh parsley is a big favourite in schools and homes) and that change over the months. Asparagus in March and artichokes in June. It is the variety in the number of food you eat in the year, whereas here , I see my friends, rotating a limited number of meal/vegetables.

The lack of variety and the processed food is in my opinion far worse than a match size piece of good cake.

@Cormoran

"It is the variety in the number of food you eat in the year, whereas here , I see my friends, rotating a limited number of meal/vegetables.
**
The lack of variety and the processed food is in my opinion far worse than a match size piece of good cake."

Sorry I don't know how to reply to a certain part of a message so have copy and pasted. This is so very true!!! As an adult, I eat what I want and when I want and have never been overweight. I like healthy food but also like to indulge! But I don't follow any rule or diet and I don't stick to certain foods for certain times of the day. I need to just do the same with the 18 month old, I guess!

@Zoink you can't partially quote on MN (yet) so copy and paste is the way to do it.

I find that mothers - at least in Australia - are not given advice from medical professionals when it comes to weaning, so they will rely on social media, instagram accounts, MN, or the industrial groups such as the recipes from Ella's kitchen.

Babies and children in France and Monaco (and Spain, Italy, ....) are followed by paediatricians not GP and they put a great importance on weaning, the main advice being the taste. " never give your child something you wouldn't eat yourself " .

So many parents are lost, and they are reprimanded by strangers on the internet about fat or carbs or protein which makes no sense (a cherry is not the sum of its macro, it is bloody delicious and who cares about its carb content) or worse argue about how the food will reach the mouth (BLW or spoon) and not what than food is. They debate about the quantity of the food not its quality.

It is not fair on the parents, they do the best they can by looking to whichever advice is available, but the medical system is not providing it in a good way.

@Cormoran my mother gave me a copy of French Children Don't Throw Food when i was pregnant, and i loved it.

I borrowed it from the library and it was interesting to see the American point of view on our raising children @Ohalrightthen , a bit like what I am experiencing observing Australians.

@Cormoran yes I've known lots of parents to use those Ella's kitchen recipes and the like. I don't want to be so restricted and planned. I just want to feed anything and everything and whenever or wherever - and just make sure they are getting all the goodness!

@PhilippaArchersOlderSister

Popcorn- I'm pretty sure this is a significant choking hazard.

Mine goes through phases where he eats everything in sight for a few days or weeks, and then it goes back to more normal for a while. Could this just be a phase?

Yes please don't give popcorn - aspirated popcorn can get into lungs and under 5s shouldn't have it. (Something I only heard about last year!) x

@Zoink everything and anything is great. Whenever and wherever, not so much! Food should always be given at set times, and at the table.

@Ohalrightthen why set times? Obv she eats breakfast in the morning, lunch in the afternoon and dinner late afternoon or early evening. But not specific set times. We have a life and don't have a strict routine. She's always slept very well - through the night from 3 months and eaten everything offered. She always eats at the table unless a small snack.

Taking all advice on, we've had porridge for breakfast with chia seeds and berries. Lunch was an egg, half an avocado and some cream cheese on brown toast. Lunch is going to be salmon steaks, mash potato mixed with cheese, milk and veg and then chunky cooked carrots, broccoli and a few green beans on the side. Snack will be some natural yoghurt and banana.

[quote Zoink]@Ohalrightthen why set times? Obv she eats breakfast in the morning, lunch in the afternoon and dinner late afternoon or early evening. But not specific set times. We have a life and don't have a strict routine. She's always slept very well - through the night from 3 months and eaten everything offered. She always eats at the table unless a small snack. [/quote]
I meant at specific mealtimes, so you only eat at breakfast, lunch and dinner, with one afternoon snack, rather than just eating whenever you fancy it, because otherwise you run the risk of confusing hunger with boredom. If you're hungry at 11, you wait til lunch. Learning to wait for food, to manage a small amount of hunger, is really really important in fostering healthy relationships with food.

There is no way a child should ever be so hungry 2 hours after a meal that they couldn't wait another hour til the next meal. Either you're not feeding your child enough of the right things at mealtimes, or you're giving in to your child when you should be encouraging them to wait.

That was the general "you" btw, not @Zoink specifically!

@Ohalrightthen I see! Yes - totally agree!

DS is 20months and is going through a asking for food constantly phase too. I remember DD doing it and usually it coincided with a growth spurt. I think DS is worse cos we are in so much more and the kitchen is right there! (I think he’s picked up my lockdown snacking habit!) When he asks for a snack and I know he’s had plenty I distract with toys or a book and half the time tht works so i figure it’s boredom/ habit and the other half he gets more insistent so I figure he is hungry and give him a snack. The other thing I do (learnt from my mother!) is always offer the kids a boring snack like a dry cracker or breadsticks- if they are genuinely hungry they will eat it... if they turn their noses up at it then you know it’s not hunger.

@Gingenius good idea! I did that the other day with cooked carrots and she turned her nose up. I then turned around and and was scoffing them all 😂 May well be growth spurt yes so I'll distract and if she carries on I'll feed her. Like you said. Many thanks!