Baby crying and anxiety

[DisneyGirl2387]

My son is 12 weeks old and I have only just done my first walk alone with him in the pram. Normally my DH or Mum comes with me. He screamed blue murder (red faced and tears running down his cheeks) as normal and I came running home. He hates the car seat too and screams so much he makes himself sick. I always try and time it so he's feed, changed, winded. I put toys in the car and pram,play music, have checked there are no sharp bits digging in - literally everything i can think of but nothing makes a difference.

It is now becoming a big issue and I get such anxiety about being out and about with him incase he goes into meltdown mode. The thought of eventually going to baby groups brings me out in a hot sweat. I can feel myself becoming more and more of a recluse. I haven't met any friends (one on one) as I know he will scream and I will get worked up. I have his 12 week jabs next week and the thought of having to take him there makes me feel sick with worry as he will be so worked up before he's even had the jabs.

Everything I've read says that crying should have reduced by now. Whereas my son cries a lot (even when we stay in). I can't decipher what his cries mean and it makes me feel like a failure. I feel like I'm struggling. Any advice would be greatly received x

What type of pushchair you have? He might get better if he sees a bit more.

That sounds tough for you. A couple of thoughts... You mention toys/music in the pram, could be he is over stimulated? Have you tried him in a sling? He may feel more contented being held, both at home and when out walking. I'd recommend discussing your feelings of escalating anxiety with your GP or HV too.

My second would tolerate the pram until she was 7 months. Maybe try a sling.

Have you tried a snoozeshade OP? He might need all stimulation to be removed to go to sleep. They go over the pram and make it dark for them.

Are you going out just as he needs a nap? Timing was crucial for me at that stage.

As for the crying, does he seem in pain, refluxy etc?

Mine was the screamy baby of our NCT group. It was mortifying. It's not a reflection on how good you are as a mum! Some babies are just more sensitive to over-stimulation/being outside/noise/literally everything!

I've got the oyster 3 pram but he is in the bassinet so I might try the stroller part to see if that helps. He has got reflux and is on omeprazole which does help with pain but he is sick a lot. My lounge carpet has seen better days! I've got a carrier but don't have much confidence putting it on myself. Perhaps I will give it a go tomorrow!! Thank you for all of your help so far. I feel very alone as a first time mum

Op I've been there too, I use to sweat when my first use to start crying it was awful. In the end I changed the bassinet to the seat of the pram, which I know goes against advice and he stopped crying and would laugh and smile instantly.
I echo the use of a carrier too, you will feel more confident with practice and honestly, babies crying at groups, no one will care. You will get people sympathizing with you, you will laugh, cry and moan about them with the other mums.
My son was the projectile vomiter of the group!
Your doing great.

My baby is 11 weeks and she also screams a lot in the pram, I think it’s boring for her because she’s still in the carrycot attachment so I have started using the car seat on the base instead and she is happier for being able to look around, still gets annoyed after a while though! I still try get her out for a walk every day though, I feel like it’s positive for both of us health wise and hopefully she’ll get used to it, I just fake a smile to those ‘oh dear, maybe she’s hungry’ comments and carry on with my day!