I just give up. 5.5 no routine and feeling so low

[nocturnalke]

I know there's been a million threads like this. But I have no one else to talk to. I'm the only one in my friendship group with a baby and I'm pretty sure my partner and mum have had enough of me going on.

I've written a couple of posts about napping. The recent one was very helpful and started using the huckleberry app which worked for the first few days. Now my daughter is 5.5 months and only naps for 20 mins, usually three time a day but sometimes only 2!

I just give up on trying to sort out a routine with napping and feeding. The stress of thinking about it and the failures every time are making me so low. I cry a lot when my partner is at work, which I think some of it is covid, weather etc.

DD just has no routine whatsoever. I try so hard. Yesterday she only had an hour total of nap times. I tried everything to get her to go sleep (bearing in mind we couldn't walk due to icy paths). So she had an earlier bedtime last night and she slept quite well until 6:10 this morning which is early for her. I washed and dressed her and then attempted to give her 7oz bearing in mind she hadn't fed for 12 hours. She had 4oz and then refused anymore - so that means for feed times are out the window. And her nap times are different cause she woke up too early. This change in napping and feeding seems to happen every day. There's no routine. I try to keep it consistent at bedtime to reflect the night/wake up time but she reacts differently every night.

Like I said Ive just given up trying to get a routine sorted. She literally does what she wants and I'm so low that the stress is making me feel worse hence the giving up. But I don't have the energy anymore. Every day is a battle. I was really just looking for somewhere to moan so I'm sorry if this post has bored you haha.

Meant to add - be kind to yourself! If every day being different works, let it happen! Babies don't follow rules

Oh I really empathise with this. One of the hardest things I found with my daughter when she was young was the lack of routine and changeability of each day.

But PPs are right - she is teeny-tiny and also, she is a little human being, not a robot, so you can’t programme her to do the same thing everyday (some days she might be more tired than other, some days she might have more energy and not feel like sleeping).

My daughter was the queen of cat naps at that age but I found as she got older, and started dropping naps, she slept for longer and a natural schedule did start to emerge (one that I still needed to be a bit flexible with though).

I also found that when we started weaning, having meal times helped the day feel like it had a bit more structure too.

It’s so hard but you aren’t doing anything “wrong” if your tiny baby isn’t following a pre-determined so routine. Be kind to yourself and it’s not forever!