Nursery questions, returning to work and sleep!!!

[elliejane91]

Hello, my son has just turned 6 months old and I'm veryyy anxious about returning to work next month. The thought of a stranger looking after my son is so strange, when it's pretty much been him and I through 2 lockdowns etc...

I have no idea what I need to provide for him if anyone can shed any light please. How do you provide food, bottles, nappies etc etc

He will have to be in nursery for 7.30am and we don't currently get up until 7am now! I feel sick at the thought of it all but can't extend mat leave

How did everyone else find returning to work?

Also... He is not sleeping well still thought the night. Wakes 3 to 4 times, think he's having a growth spurt as feeding loads and is also teething.

I have a question about day time naps too... He naps at 8.45 for around 45 mins. Then at 12.30 for only 30 mins, can't seem to extend this and have tried all techniques. Then his evening nap is getting up to 1 hour 45 mins. How do I switch this around??? Help!

Hi. I didn't want to leave you unanswered, although it is a long time since mine were babies. Hopefully this will 'bump' your question for someone who has been in your shoes more recently.

Firstly though, yes, I should imagine every new Mum get anxious about going back to work and leaving their baby for the first time. This year, of course it is so much worse for new Mums as you've not been able to mix with others or leave your baby with a trusted friends or relations for short times to build up the length of time you leave them for as most Mums before you might have done. Plus, I presume settling in times at Nursery are more restricted than usual.

The best thing to do will be to phone up the Nursery, tell them you are nervous about leaving him for the first time, and can they let you know exactly what they want you to bring. So things like nappies - some will say just leave a pack there and they'll put it up on a shelf with his name on it and let you know when it is going to need replacing. Other Nurseries will just expect a full pram bag each day. The Nursery staff will be absolutely used to parents not knowing what to bring / how / when / how much etc - after all, why should any of us know these things with our first baby ?

Re his naps - he will soon get used to what the Nursery do, don't panic. Also, as you have found, you'll think you've got him onto one routine, and then he'll have a growth spurt and it will all go to pot anyway.

Re getting up - if your drop off is at 7.30, unless you get get yourself up, washed, dressed, and fed in under 25mins and you live next door to the Nursery, then I think you are going to have to get up earlier

One thing that will help is to get in the habit of packing the pram bag ready for the next day when you get home and not trying to make time to do it in the morning. Just have it ready, in the hall, and add milk / food when you get up.

I guess then it depends on your job. When I went back, I was straight into a busy day and never had chance to think about them until home time. If your job is busy that will be the same. If you are sitting around twiddling your thumbs at work then you will be more likely to miss them, I presume.

Hi. My little boy recently started nursery and here’s what I found
All the nurseries I spoke to provide food, you might have to supply your own formula/expressed milk and bottles, I’m not sure as mine didn’t have milk in the day any more. They varied on whether they provide nappies and wipes. I provide my own which I’m happy with.

Call a few and see which you like the feel of best. Compare what they tell you and see if they can provide photos or a video of the baby room (assuming you won’t be able to go in to look around).

My nursery is very baby led so they sleep and eat when they want, others had a stricter routine with food at certain times etc. Nurseries are so understanding about naps, teething etc, they see it all. But again chat to them on the phone and you’ll get a feel for how they respond and reassure you.

All the nurseries I spoke to did free settling in sessions too, so in the week or two before you go back to work you can leave them for an hour, then two, then maybe for one meal and build up to a full day.

It’s so hard to leave them at the start. I cried in my car in the car park every day for about the first two weeks. It’s worse during covid as you have to hand them over at the door - worse for me I think but seemed much better for my son.

It’s so emotionally hard for mums but my son has been in nursery since August now and loves it! He gets so excited to go in and he honestly has more fun there than he does at home with me! So many new toys and activities and he sees other children which is great for his development.

Good luck!

Most nurseries provide food, but you bring in formula and nappies. I found it easiest to bulk buy nappies so you don’t run out after 2/3 days.

Your nursery will be able to go through all their policies etc before you start. Give them a call today and go through what you need to bring and what they provide.

In regards to getting up, I’d start rejigging your routine now so it’s not such a surprise when you go back to work.

Move naps and bedtime forward by 5 mins a day, until you’re both up at 6am so you have enough time to get up, feed, get dressed etc to leave at 7.

Nursery will deal with naps - they are magicians for sleepy children! Dd napped better at nursery than she ever did at home. It probably won’t follow your routine, but he’ll still get enough sleep. Going with the flow for the first few weeks is important. Don’t get caught up on the small stuff.

Honestly, after the first week you will be in a routine and it will be fine.
If he wakes in the night, he wakes in the night, you still have to go to work regardless of that so you kinda just crack on.
Naps, they will accommodate these, it’s on their watch so they will go with him.
And you will have to just get up earlier to get there for 7.30, suck it up!
He will have a ball! All those little pals he will make, activities he will discover, the learning and social skills he will gain, he’ll be grand.

It’s not as huge as you think, and I promise, it all works out fine very quickly.

The nap length and waking 3 to 4 times a night are normal for this age. If you have a partner then you must make sure they pull their weight.

You need to ask your nursery for a list of things they need and they they want as they all do things differently.

Thank you so much for the replies everyone. I feel well reassured and like you say it's a new chapter and I'm sure we will both be fine once we have adapted it will just be hard to begin because all we have had is each other !

Hi, I'm a childminder, not a nursery, but take on babies when their mum's return to work so it's a similar situation.

I ask parents to write out their baby's daily routine and I try to follow it as closely as possible, with a few adjustments to fit in with our day. I find this helps the babies settle as they feel secure in their usual routine.

Perhaps you could ask nursery if they can do the same? They may not be able to keep the exact routine as they have other children there, but it's worth asking.

Good luck, we do find that most babies settle pretty quickly and have a great time with us.