I’m about to blow... how do you keep calm

[Gice]

Not had enough sleep (snoring oh, 5 year old wet the bed, 2 year old crying out...)

2 yo is being typically 2 and being difficult and tantrummy about everything. Everything from wanting a toy to not wanting the toy to wanting to watch bing no Leo no Ted no pig no bing, wanting one cereal until sibling has another and throwing it everywhere, thrusting shoes in my face while I’m loading dishwasher because ‘want walk’ refusing to put said shoes and coat on so we can go for the walk. Wanting to go in the park but then just standing there not wanting to do anything, screaming when picked up to try to go on swing/slide, screaming about holding hand to cross the road, trying to run into road and screaming and twisting away when picked up to stop running into road, wanting lunch but then not wanting lunch... 5 yo being extremely clingy and I can’t leave the room without immediately being called. Teenagers fighting with each other. One teen finding every excuse under the sun to not do home learning. One teen having issues with the sound on live lessons and is missing loads of each lesson just trying to sort the sound out-I’m trying to help but it’s just not connecting and can hear the little two arguing in the other room and the 5 year old won’t stop calling me and I’m getting more and more wound up and am going to scream at the next person who asks anything of me.

How do you stay calm?

It’s nothing major just constant and incessant and relentless and I can feel my fuse getting shorter and shorter...

I leave the room sometimes

Force a smile into your face. look at your kids and smile and ask them for a cuddle. Even your teenagers.
Then tell them to take the afternoon off for a family walk, come back, watch a film and eat snacks.

Take a clean break in the evenings (30 min with no kids whatsoever!)

Sounds tough, yes leave the room for even a few moments and take some deep breaths

I feel your pain OP! That’s a lot for anyone to deal with. Is your DH/DP around during the day? At least tomorrow it’s the weekend so no schooling for the teens. Is there anything your 2 year old really loves doing? Perhaps you can set some time aside for that & hopefully include the 5 year old. We’re struggling with just the one DD12 so I can’t imagine how stressful your life must get.

Leaving the room and deep breaths are my usual tactic but I can’t even go for a wee without 5 yo shouting “mum, muuuum, muuuuuum, MUUUUUM” so I’m ending up getting even more irate!

What age are teenagers? Are they old enough to babysit while you take yourself a long walk..alone..best advice i was given when expecting my first was walk out of the room...make sure they are safe..stick toddler in playpen and catch your breathe..toddlers are adorable at times but they can be huge pains in the asses when notion takes them

Ahhh OP I really feel your pain. I have a threenager in the house with me and 14 week old. It's been really tough and Monday and Tuesday this week I had several outbursts.
I find even just calling a friend or my mum for a little moan / rant can help and making sure I get a break at some point (even just half an hour when DH gets home) to reset.

Unfortunately partner works 4.30am -5.30pm 6 days a week. He helps a bit in the evenings but is understandably knackered.

At least the 2 year old still naps

I leave the room or turn the TV on or get them all out for a walk or fail miserably and shout at them.

I have a 4yo, a nearly 3 and a newborn. Lunchtime is movie time I need my relaxed lunch......

Do you have a garden? I have a 4 and 6yo, and when it gets to that point I usually insist they put on whatever clothes they need for the weather and go outside to play. We have child-proofed the garden so I just keep an eye out through the window whilst I get on with jobs in the kitchen. It gives me time to de-stress alone, and they always come back in in a better mood. Alternatively I make everyone go to their rooms to read books/play quietly alone for 10/20/30 minutes (this only works because they have their own rooms). I don't have teenagers, but I would be tempted to throw them outside too if at all possible. Or make them supervise the younger ones through the window whilst I hid...

Leave the room. Close your eyes abs breath from low down in your stomach. Count to 20. Fold your arms and rub your upper arms with your hands while you breathe.
Then go back in!

What's your husband doing to work those hours? Are they even legal?

@YRGAM. surely there are lots of jobs with shifts that length? Hope you have a better day today, it’s exhausting.

Thank you everyone for your support last week, just being able to vent and getting some advice really helped. 2 year old woke up much happier after a nap and 5 year old has been better over the weekend.

@YRGAM sorry I was a bit frazzled and not clear-he’s out of the house those hours not working hours. Also doesn’t always work quite so many hours but work is manic at the moment and he’s also covering an employee with Covid-19

Glad to hear things were a bit easier over the weekend! Always nice to just get that slight recharge of patience...