So stressed about cooking for baby

[AbsolutelyUselessMum]

I am so ashamed that I've changed my username for this.

I'm 30 and I absolutely hate cooking. I thought that I wasn't the only one, and that quite a few others never cooked. But I've got an 11 month old daughter, and have suddenly realised that I can't keep giving her pouches until she goes to school

I've done some research and bought some supposedly easy books (eg What Mummy Makes), I plan to batch cook as much as possible, but it just feels so overwhelming. I see a recipe for fish fingers that looks easy, then I realise I'll have to think about the potatoes and the veg as well... plus the other two meals for the day! I know, I sound ridiculous. This kind of thing seems to be second nature to everyone else. I know, I know, cooking properly will be much healthier for me and DH as well (we currently live off ready meals or ready done sauces etc, but organic and high quality ones).

I suppose I'm posting here because I want to know...

Was anyone else like me, and how did you transition to being a cook?? Were you left with enough time to sleep and shower and actually spend time with your child?!

Are there any useful tips and shortcuts, other than batch cooking and trying to eat the same things as a family rather than cooking separate meals?

Gosh I feel like such a failure of a human being.

@LizFlowers bit her baby is nearly 1....surely they don't need it liquidised? I didn't with mine anyway. But that's beside the point, the OP said she has ready meals most nights.

You don't have to make anything high-effort, and I wouldn't bother making fish fingers etc from scratch. I make these meals a lot for DS (who is older but had them since a baby) and they take very little skill:

-baked potato, flesh scooped out and mixed with butter and some cheese and low salt/sugar baked beans

-cheese omelette cut into strips and some sort of carb

-avocado on toast

-macaroni cheese (really easy to make) with peas in

-cut up a load of veg (sweet potatoes, peppers etc) into big chunks and roast in oil them mix with plain couscous and some cubes of cheese/strips of chicken

-boiled egg cut into quarters and toast soldiers

-houmous with strips of pitta and some cucumber sticks

-crackers, cheese, slices of tomato

Just do a couple of different vegetables to go with everything you make. Cucumber, peppers, tomatoes and avocados are all good to have on hand if you have a meal where you don't want to faff about cooking vegetables. Food doesn't have to always be a hot meal to be healthy.

Then I'd try to cook one new thing a week so it isn't overwhelming. Something like lentil dall with rice is nice and easy to start with. Cook double and pop the rest in the freezer so you can grab it quickly.

Good luck!

Get a repertoire of Really Easy Recipes and use those. You don't have to be stressing over seven-veg sauces and home made fish fingers. You just need simple stuff that isn't packed with salt. If you do toast / cereal for breakfast, fruit for snacks, picky plates for lunch as others have mentioned, you just need to think about dinner. Here are some easy ones to try:

• Cheesy peas pasta - boil pasta, drain, stir in a spoonful of philadelphia (violife if vegan / dairy intolerant) and a spoonful of frozen peas

• Scrambled egg on toast

• Gnocchi and pesto (from a packet and a jar - you only use a tiny bit of pesto so don't worry about the salt)

• (if not veggie) cooked chicken pieces which you can get in a packet, with boiled potatoes and sweetcorn

• ready-cooked fish e.g. salmon flakes with pasta

Lots and lots of fruit and veg sticks for snacks or with meals.

Thank you all once again for giving me so many ideas, and for the reassurance. I am so glad I posted, I even slept better last night because I was less worried about it all

Something else I was wondering, was how to serve the more liquidy meals like pasta? I obviously spoon-feed the pouches at the moment, and give finger food each day in the form of toast or some fruit or veg. But I'm not sure how I'd go about giving her macaroni cheese for example. As one of you pointed out, she's nearly 1 now - does that mean I shouldn't really spoon feed her anymore? Do I really just let her dig in with her hands? I think I've got used to a rather easy ride so far, things may need to change!

I hate cooking- never cook from scratch, will cook a steak or a ready bagged stir fry but that's it. My kids are fine- they love a ready meal as much as I do. Below is what I generally feed them on an average week
Jacket potato with cheese and beans- easy and done in microwave
fish fingers out of a box with frozen veg
chicken goujons with chopped up carrots and cucumbers with hoummous
BIrds Eye do a really good frozen pasta thing with broccoli and peas which you just shove in the microwave
Toast and cereals for breakfast
Cheese and crackers for snacks with fresh fruit or youghurts.
Pasta and a jar of sauce
Marks and Spencers do a really good range of toddler ready meals.

I've never batch cooked and never intend to- life is too short.
Just before the cook from scratch feckers pounce, I'm a size 8 and none of my children are overweight.

@AbsolutelyUselessMum

Thank you all once again for giving me so many ideas, and for the reassurance. I am so glad I posted, I even slept better last night because I was less worried about it all

Something else I was wondering, was how to serve the more liquidy meals like pasta? I obviously spoon-feed the pouches at the moment, and give finger food each day in the form of toast or some fruit or veg. But I'm not sure how I'd go about giving her macaroni cheese for example. As one of you pointed out, she's nearly 1 now - does that mean I shouldn't really spoon feed her anymore? Do I really just let her dig in with her hands? I think I've got used to a rather easy ride so far, things may need to change!

I'd let her just dig in with the paws. Fusilli is easier to pick up than some of the other pasta shapes, less slippery.

Best thing with small kids is that they love random assortments of stuff from the fridge I. E. Leftover chicken, tomatoes, cheese, bread sticks. I usually say its 'tapas'

What do you cook for yourself op? We eat with our little ones usually about 4 times a week and the rest I grab something out of the freezer. In my freezer I have some bolognese sauce and some tomato veg sauce which I batch cook once every 8 weeks. I portion them up and generally they have a portion a week. In my tomato veg sauce I put- passata, courgette, aubergine, red pepper, butter beans (for iron) onion and carrot. I do a really big pan full and let it simmer and whizz up til smooth. Then I just pull a bag out once a week and warm it up and put some pasta on - serve with melted cheese. This is a hit with both my 3 year old and 10 month old. I also whizz the bolognese sauce so it’s smooth- they tend to have that once a week too.

For the rest of their meals I will chop up some sweet potato and roast in the oven with either a fishcake (from chilled section as tend to have more proper fish in) or a salmon fillet (half a fillet is a portion-I’m cooking for two) I will boil another veg- broccoli, sweet corn or carrots and/or chop some avocado up.

Our meals in the week that they eat with us tend to be things like- roast dinner, lamb stew, full English, omelette etc.

I didn’t bother over complicating it by trying out special recipes for babies. Not got that sort of time on my hands!

They normally have fruit or yoghurt (blueberries and banana whizzed up with a tub of Greek yoghurt) for afters.

www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/quick-mushroom-spinach-lasagne

Just in case you wanted some recipes- this is really easy and also very very tasty. You don't need to know how to make a sauce because it uses cream cheese. To make it even simpler you can use the ready chopped garlic you buy in a jar. Any old cheese works, I've done it with cheddar before. Then cool it down for DD and cut into chunks.

DD is 6, I can cook basics but don't like it very much and have very little time or energy for it, luckily her favourite things need little in the way of skill or time.

Scrambled or boiled eggs always go down well, scrambled egg on toast with cherry tomatoes and cucumber is a favourite lunch that she asks for.

Banana pancakes are a favourite breakfast, mash banana, add an egg, stir, then fry blobs till cooked.

Pork loin steak with roasted greenbeans and broccoli. Everything on tray with drizzle of oil and seasoning. Cook at gas 6 for 20-25 mins until it looks right.

Lasagna (bought from supermarket and placed in oven) with some kind of veg.

Fish fingers with mash, peas and sweetcorn.

Sausages with roast or mashed potatoes, some kind of veg usually broccoli, cauliflower or sweetcorn and gravy (bisto). Sausages in the oven with potatoes, mash usually frozen or from a packet and veg in a covered jug with a drizzle of water for 3 minutes in the microwave.

She generally wants a picnic plate at lunch then a hot meal for dinner, I think it's because she likes her packed lunch routine at school. A picnic plate usually has yogurt, tomatoes or cucumber, berries or grapes, cheese string or babybel, some sliced meat and a carb like a mini wrap or rice cake as she doesn't like sandwiches.

OP you aren't a rubbish mum. I'm at the weaning stage and hate it. DS is fine, he eats literally anything, but trying to make sure it's not too spicy/salty/choking hazard etc etc and thinking about it 3 times a day is making my head hurt

I use alot of tinned veg and fruit as you can add it so easily to mains and things, just check the salt content of veg. I also double up when I make some things, so I don't have the hassle of batch cooking but can save leftovers for the next day. So cook an extra portion of pasta/ mashed fruit and yoghurt and save for the next day. I also use combinations that I wouldn't for an adult but can get away with for kids (DS tonight had some leftover new potatoes mashed up mixed with cream cheese and tuna and a little bit of dried herbs sprinkled in, or leek and potato soup mixed in with a bit of pasta. Tbh I use up alot of odds and ends for baby more than cook!)

You're not an 'Absolutelyuselessmum' by the way. You're doing your best!

Your baby will learn to use a spoon, just cut things like pasta up small.

Also, another thought if you want to try a bit of cooking from scratch it some kind of traybake where you roast everything in the oven on one tray. This one looks quite simple:

www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/rosemary-chicken-oven-roasted-ratatouille

Or maybe this one without the olives:

www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/cod-tomato-traybake

Have you got a slow cooker op? You are not useless by the way. I slow cook beef on high for 4 hours. Doesn't need much seasonsing. Makes loads

Chicken and veg and mash.

Also the meat counted or butcher will sell things like meat balls or whatever.

Pasta

Eggs and toast or spaghetti on toast sometimes.

Me and DH each cook one main meal on the weekend (eg. spag bol, bean chilli etc). That does for leftovers on Mon and Tues evenings (you can switch the pasta/rice for jacket potato/cous cous to change it up) as well as a portion for the freezer. Then on Wed I'll often coat some chicken breasts in spices, brown in the pan then chuck in the oven with some veg to roast - the leftover chicken makes fab hot sandwiches or with a salad the next day for lunch. Then Thursday I'll give the boys a little easy tea like fish fingers and veg and me and DH will have takeaway or something adult after they've gone to bed. Then Friday could be something from the freezer from a previous week. I think the key is planning and making the most of leftovers!

I wasn't confident at cooking, i just followed recipes online for simple things (I mentioned spag bol and chilli above as they are so straightforward) and I've cooked them so many times now I can do it from memory.

Things that you can buy that might help you: meat thermometer - tells you instantly if meat is safely cooked so you don't panic and overcook it to be safe - Google will tell you the safe min temps.
Tupperwares and freezer bags for leftovers - I use a dry erase marker to write what it is and the date on them.
A sharp knife - prep is so much easier and takes half the time with a decent knife.

I keep a stash of Cook kids meals for emergencies too as they cook straight from the freezer and are the equivalent of a home cooked meal (just not cooked in my home!).

Apart from the first month when we were trialling different tastes, DS has always got whatever we eat. I don’t put much salt in the food when I cook and let him eat it himself. DS is 12 months now and still doing that. We all have easy meals like curries / lasagna / pasta / omelettes etc most often and I save anything more complex for the weekends.

Oh and why are you MAKING fish fingers? Just buy them. I get the birdseye 100% cod ones for DS and he loves them.

Something else I was wondering, was how to serve the more liquidy meals like pasta

^

I used to blend up bolognaise and serve it on a spoon. I couldn't be bothered with all the excessive cleaning, although I do admit the Spag Bol Messy Baby Face photo is fun to have, but every friggin evening is a bit much.

I make thick pasta sauces - like bolognaise - where the ingrediants are stewed for ages while I do other things. It clings to spaghetti and other pastas and just serve it like that. I never mashed pasta and I don’t think you should do it with DD - at her age she should start eating finger food if she hasn’t already

I struggled too at first and used to rely on pouches and jars most days but for a few months now we've found some easy and quick recipes that are much cheaper and ds prefers them massively! We stick to mainly cereal, Weetabix,toast and fruit for breakfast, sandwiches,pesto pasta and finger type foods for lunch then have found a frozen meal for dinner works well and isn't time consuming at all.
Veg chilli, frozen butternut squash,frozen mixed veg,frozen diced onions and peppers, sweetcorn, kidney beans, whatever you like, tin of tomatoes,handful of red lentils, chilli powder, garlic and a cup of water and just cook away until everything is reduced and softened,either leave chunky or mash, can either stir in cooked rice and freeze in pots. Bolognese sauce is good and can pack it with veg, I add in crated carrot and courgette, chopped mushrooms and frozen onions and peppers and peas, you can have this with chopped spaghetti stirred in too so it's literally just defrosting one tub in the microwave. You could adapt the chilli recipe buy swapping the chilli powder for curry powder and adding a bit of coconut milk at the end. Frozen veg is amazing, no chopping and faffing around, just chuck it all up n the pan! Also mince in gravy with frozen diced veg added can be served with frozen mash or veg and only takes ten minutes. Tinned tomatoes and red lentils make a good base for most quick one pan meals and can add or leave out what you like. Frozen cauliflower cheese also goes down really well! Once you've got a few things in your freezer it gets much easier

Batch cooking to freeze is your friend my friend. For example. Big bag of spuds, boil and mash them all. No more hassle than making single portion and it will last ages in the freezer. Sauces. Bolognese. Stews and soups.

I find things like prechopped onion, rice pouches frozen veg fruit compote help

Proper lunch and easy tea. (Pasta pesto, pizza, fish fingers chips and beans etc)

Find some family friendly meals you can eat with her so you’re not cooking all day

Write a rough menu plan even if you don’t follow to the letter so you’re not floundering all week trying to Cobble together meals

Ps I think you’re on the right track as I find babies who are weaned exclusively on jars abs pouches often struggle with the texture and taste of “real” freshly cooked food

My baby at 10 months suddenly refused to let me spoon feed him, you may find this moment will come. Maybe not.

The things I mentioned are mostly finger foods and if I do pasta/anything with sauce I just put less sauce on so its not swimming in it and he picks it up. He's using a fork now though (18m)

A good trick with pasta is to buy the pasta twizzels and stir in enough sauce to coat them without it being really messy. Babies can pick up twizzels more easily than long pasta and the sauce sticks in them well compared with say butterfly pasta.

I think sometimes the recipes look overwhelming due to number of ingredients.. look through the books and see which ones have less ingredients and the actual process. Some look stressful but actually are ok when you do it.

My boy has a lot of pasta. I hate cooking! But I vary the pasta sauces. Fast and we can eat them too so then I don’t have to cook so much.
Tuna sweet corn mayo pasta
Cream cheese broccoli pea & cheddar (can add white fish to it too)
Simple Bolognese (you can buy pre done soffrito mix which is onion, carrot and celery all chopped up, makes it much easier)

Scrambled eggs with spinach and cheese

I have a bunch of these in the freezer www.abbeyskitchen.com/cheesy-high-iron-baby-meatballs-for-blw-toddlers-families/

In the mummy makes book the cheats risotto is really fast and easy after the first time you make it, I mix up the ingredients sometimes w.g. Add salmon. You can use leftovers to make into risotto balls for the freezer (also in that book)

Its also easy to vary porridge with different fruits or by adding cinnamon or all spice. Same with mashing fruit with yogurt.

I do buy my son the little dish ready meals too, he has maybe one or two a week when I’m rushed with work etc, I usually try and add in a it of extra veg (e.g. frozen peas) but they’re fine on there own too.

And as PP have said fish fingers from a box are fine too! As long as it’s not the same every day and you vary things where you can it’s fine. Don’t beat yourself up.

Oh Re spoons, think my son started learning to use a spoon himself around 11/12 months and is now a pro at 15 months. But they can use their hands too just be prepared for mess!