2.5 year old calling out in the night

[Emmai13]

Our 2.5 year old has been calling out in the night for months now, and we are both shattered. She shouts for Mummy 3-4 times a night but doesn't actually need anything, she goes straight back to sleep 95% of the time. My husband has been going in there the last few weeks hoping this would stop it, as it seems she wants me, but it hasn't. We have tried bribery, getting her a special teddy, reward charts, a gro clock, but I'm really at a loss as to what to do or try next. We have another baby on the way and would really like this to stop before I have to get up multiple times a night with a newborn.

This is probably not what you want to hear but at the first shout I just bring my DS in bed with me. I also have a 7month old and find I get much more sleep that way.

The baby had a few really unsettled nights and this causes DS to not sleep so well in our bed so he stopped coming in!

Agree with previous poster - DH and I work full time and have done since DD was 20 weeks. We don't have the luxury of one parent being a STAHP to be able to cope with sleepless nights without doing a challenging job the next day so we took the path of least resistance and bring her in with us. DD nearly 5 now and I'm due twins in the next 2 weeks. DD is old enough now to understand she shortly won't be able to come in with us in the middle of the night and so in the last couple of weeks has stayed in her own bed 🤞🤞sometimes you just have to do what's easiest not necessarily what someone else thinks is best and if that means co sleeping etc then so be it

On the occasions when she's been ill or really upset, I have brought her into our bed, but she doesn't sleep well with us. She's never slept in our bed for a whole night and because there isn't really enough room in there I think I'd actually end up sleeping less!

I did get rid of DD cot bed about that age and bought a single bed instead - that enabled me to get in with her and get a better nights sleep (a little bit anyway) rather than squishing her in the middle of DH and I and neither of us get any? I did feel like I made the bigger compromise but at the end of the day it was me she called out for plus Im significantly less grumpy on less sleep so worked better for us as a family! 🤣

Ours did this and still very occasionally does it (at 4 now). We weaned off responding. So didn't go in immediately and only went in if it escalated. Then we'd go in, keep talk minimal, not stay long, leave. Next time, even less. Eventually he would cry for a couple of minutes and then give up. If he cries out now I only go in if he doesn't calm down after a few minutes and 9 times out of 10 he cries out and then stops and goes back to sleep.

Have you ever thought of just leaving her to it? By going in/bribing etc you're reinforcing that by shouting in the middle of the night she gets attention.

Taking her into your own bed would be making a rod for your own back IMO.

Unless she is ill I would use something similar to the CC method.

I'd try And ignore her for a few minutes then dad go in hand cup of water (in a leak proof container) then leave the room only day the words here's your water. Hopefully she'll get the hint and go back to sleep

So I usually wait for as long as possible before waking up my husband (she doesn't wake him 🤣), last night for instance, the first time I ignored her and she went back to sleep, the second and third time I had to send my husband in as she started crying. When he goes in, he doesn't say anything, it's just the presence of someone being in her room that gets her back to sleep. On few occasions I think he strokes her head or tucks her back in, but he's never usually in there for more than a few minutes before she's snoring away again. I agree, it's reinforcing her behaviour, tonight I'll leave her a bit longer and see what happens!

Is she in a single bed ?

Not what anyone wants to hear but my 6yr old son still does this. Multiple times a night.

@FippertyGibbett

Is she in a single bed ?

No she's still in a cot bed, but I'm wondering whether she will be comfier in a single as she's quite a big 2 year old.

Yes, it’s time for a single bed.

Yes, time for a single bed. Make a really really big deal about it - let her choose bed linen, decorate with stickers, bed guard so she doesn't fall out etc. Would she like a pretty night light?
I would do what @Vinowitch suggests. Also at that age we used a sticker chart to encourage behaviour. And straight out bribery. Have you talked to her about it, and that it is making mummy and daddy tired, and that if she doesn't do it for one whole night she can have pancakes for breakfast (or whatever)?
Her life is about to change massively so you are right to want to crack this before baby arrives.

This happens every night here, first time I go and get him to sleep in my bed. I'm too tired to do shutting otherwise and it makes a happier home all round.

@domesticslattern

Yes, time for a single bed. Make a really really big deal about it - let her choose bed linen, decorate with stickers, bed guard so she doesn't fall out etc. Would she like a pretty night light? I would do what *@Vinowitch* suggests. Also at that age we used a sticker chart to encourage behaviour. And straight out bribery. Have you talked to her about it, and that it is making mummy and daddy tired, and that if she doesn't do it for one whole night she can have pancakes for breakfast (or whatever)? Her life is about to change massively so you are right to want to crack this before baby arrives.

I think you're right. I'm at the point now where it just needs to stop, and she IS old enough to understand. I need to be firmer with her and also try the sticker chart again for rewarding good behaviour.