7 month old sleep is rubbish...do I need to change routine?

[NEAKT5]

Sorry for the long post I just feel I need to get this out in the hope that someone has been through the same and can maybe help!

DS will be 7 months tomorrow, we moved him to his bigger cot (originally in a Snuzpod) about a month ago and he rarely sleeps in it for long. I know a lot of people will suggest self settling but I just can’t leave him to cry.

Currently his day goes like this:
Wakes around 6:30-7 and normally takes 6ozs of his bottle by half 7.
Playtime and then normally a nap at around half 8/9 for 40 minutes.
Breakfast at around half 9/10 each day and then 5ozs at roughly half 10.

Most days he’ll nap for an hour at about 12.
6/7ozs around half 1.
Normally naps at half 2/3 for 40 mins.
Has a small tea at around half 4 then 6/7 ozs around 5 and then will be normally awake until his last bottle at half 7/8 which he normally falls asleep with.

I’ve tried putting him down awake in the cot and he just turns over and starts crawling around or crying wanting back up.

Most nights after putting him down he’ll stay asleep for an hour and then he wakes crying and needs picked up and cuddled before going back in. But after this first wake up he wakes up a few times between that and then eventually at around 1 I’ll just bring him in the bed because I’ve already tried settling him multiple times. I know I’m creating this habit myself but I tell myself that he’s only young once and needs me. However I will be going back to work in May and would like to get him into his own room and mainly sleeping in his own bed by then so am just wondering how I can start helping this soon.

We use white noise for him and I think this helps him stay asleep for a while but doesn’t tend to work anymore during the night, it used to when he was in his snuzpod. He hates the bath so I can’t use this as part of his routine and he rarely sits still enough for a story.

He just wakes when you try to put him down for daytime naps in the cot and then is grumpy from being overtired so I just hold him for naps.

I know a lot of people won’t agree with what I’m doing and will say he needs to learn to sleep alone but he’s my first baby and I’ve just wanted to give him as much as comfort as he wants and needs! but obviously the older he gets the more I’m worried he will never sleep in his cot for more than a few hours.

And a note... some days he will refuse to nap for more than 20 mins! Today is one of those days 😂 that happens maybe a couple days a week!

I know you already know the answer, but I'm going to say it anyway. He needs to be sleep trained. You also need a nap routine, as an absolute minimum.

Before anyone jumps down my throat, sleep training DOES NOT EQUAL CRYING.

Look at Lucy Wolfe no cry sleep solution. Works a treat and involves zero crying.

I think you’ve got unrealistic expectations, many babies his age wake through the night and much later. It’s hard to deal with though!
If he’s walking after his first sleep cycle in the evening he could be overtired, could you get him some more daytime sleep?

My baby was like this and the only thing that made it any better was sleep training; it’s not been a magical cure but it helped DS sleep in his cot for naps for a good hour and only wake up a couple of times a night. It sounds like at the moment he doesn’t know how to settle himself.

Just going off of my nearly 7 month old, could he be overtired, maybe I read it wrong but it seems like he is awake for 4+ hours before bedtime. This seems like quite a long time for his age. From what I’ve read their awake time at this age should be around 2-3hours max.

Just for example my little one tends to have a quick cat nap of around 20mins at 4/4.30 to see her through to bedtime.

If you’re finding it hard to achieve a nap at this time of day, could you bring his bedtime forward to around 6/6.30pm? Just to see if that helps.

My daughter used to nap on me and needed help getting back to sleep regularly through the night. We used a dummy and white noise to help settle her in her bed rather than falling asleep on me and then putting her down as she used to just wake up.

Just chill mama on Instagram has some useful information.

They will link their cycles eventually, it just takes some babies longer that others x

Thank you all for your replies.

I think it’s a combination of wanting cosied to sleep as well as being overtired some nights but yes it is difficult to get a nap in I do try but after 3pm he fights it and refuses to sleep no matter what I try!

I don’t feel that I’m being unrealistic, yes babies wake during the night and I know and understand this but there’s a difference between a few wake ups and waking up every half an hour to an hour 6 or 7 times a night!

I would be happy with 2/3 wakes ups a night but at the minute it’s 6/7 so I’m up half the night! I’m currently just cosying him to sleep and then putting him back in the cot until his next wake up rather than bringing him in the bed because we do want him to go to his own room in a couple months!

I’ve tried to leave him for a few mins when he cry but he just crawls around the cot crying until I pick him up. Honestly I don’t think there’s much else I can do, friends have suggested adding a night time feed to see if it helps but I’m just not sure about that!

@Gigitree thank you I will check that Instagram page! X

Well, your options are

1. keep doing what you're doing and learn to cope with it
2. sleep train

Your baby might grow out of it soon, or he might not. My friend has a 18month old who still wakes every 2 hours and has to be held to sleep. It's up to you to decide what you can cope with.

I did CC for self settling at 6m, and for night wakes at 10m. First time round it took a week, and then i had naptime and bedtime to myself. Second time round it took one night, and she slept 7-7.

Decide what you can live with.

Wait, you're not feeding him at night? That's probably why he's waking, poor soul is hungry!

By 6 months, dd was down to one nap a day either before of after lunch. Yes, it was bloody early and some of her peers are still on 2 naps now (12 months) but she stopped fighting naps, and they gradually lengthened. She then slept better at night in turn. Bit perfect by any means, but much better than previously.

@Ohalrightthen well you’re making it sound like I starve my child, he didn’t need a night feed as he was mainly sleeping through before this and he gets all of the formula he’s meant to get during the day as well as breakfast and dinner. There’s the possibility he may be waking up wanting a bottle now and it’s my next thing to try if he continues waking but it certainly wasn’t an issue before and he’s settling as soon as he hold him so I honestly don’t think it’s hunger!

@Findahouse21 oh really, it’s funny how all babies are so different! DS definitely couldn’t do one nap he would be so grumpy haha!

[quote NEAKT5]@Ohalrightthen well you’re making it sound like I starve my child, he didn’t need a night feed as he was mainly sleeping through before this and he gets all of the formula he’s meant to get during the day as well as breakfast and dinner. There’s the possibility he may be waking up wanting a bottle now and it’s my next thing to try if he continues waking but it certainly wasn’t an issue before and he’s settling as soon as he hold him so I honestly don’t think it’s hunger!

@Findahouse21 oh really, it’s funny how all babies are so different! DS definitely couldn’t do one nap he would be so grumpy haha![/quote]
He's growing though, he'sgoing through massive development! Baby sleep isn't linear, it gets better and worse, and he won't stay asleep if he's hungry. Surely that was the first thing you tried!?

I’d be tempted to try a night time feed just in case it settles him but if he’s waking so early in the night it’s unlikely to be that. Both my DC stopped night time feeds at 7 months and I’ve tried to see if it helps DS but it doesn’t.
I would have a research on sleep training, there’s lots of different methods out there, some more gentle than others ; I felt brushed off by the health visitors saying babies waking is normal but I couldn’t cope with hourly waking up which meant I virtually had no sleep. Sleep training takes a few nights to work and you have to be really consistent.

@user1493413286 it is difficult when the health visitors are like that especially ours who doesn’t have children so doesn’t really understand even if she thinks she does haha! I think you’re right I don’t think it’s hunger considering he wakes about 40 mins after going to bed and then again maybe an hour later as he has a full bottle just before bed but it’s maybe worth a try in the middle of the night to see if it helps him sleep longer!

The time between 7-12 months is really difficult for sleep. By far the hardest bit with both of mine. It’s so to the combination of teething, starting solids, separation anxiety and becoming mobile (their brains often try to practice in their sleep). I would definitely be feeding him. Both of mine had regular night feeds until between 9-14 months and then dropped them no problem when they were ready. It sounds like your expectations are a bit more than they should be for his age. If you feed him every time he wakes, does he sleep better? If you were to feed him every time and bring him to bed with you, do you end up getting more sleep? If you have a partner he can also do half of the night wakings like he’ll need to do when you start back to work. Babies don’t usually consistently sleep through the night for quite a while longer. So I would try to think of it as doing whatever works so you get the maximum amount of sleep (which your partner sharing half that load too). It really won’t last forever and the best thing to be is well rested.

@mindutopia thank you, I think you’re right I think you hear of other peoples babies at this age being in their own room and sleeping most of the night and you just think you’re doing something wrong. Or even just worrying about the future and him being much older and still needing us to sleep when we decide we want another baby! Maybe I’m just thinking too far into the future but that’s always been an issue for me haha

The bringing him into bed I did want to stop myself because I honestly don’t sleep well with him in the bed even though he does haha! My partner has always shared the night feeds when we done them other than the nights he had work (he does shifts) thankfully but when he wakes during the night at the minute he only seems to be go back to sleep for me!

I used to have the go with the flow approach for sleep so that we were all sleeping as much as we could but I think the closer it gets to going back to work it’s just been playing on my mind more and because even if we move the cover in bed DS stirs

He is still tiny. Just cuddle your baby. He wants you because he loves you and your his safe place.

@Thatwentbadly I completely understand that and that’s the approach I have always taken with him but that’s also hard to do when your exhausted if they aren’t sleeping great even with you sometimes! And also when you miss your partner and would just like some time in the evenings with him before the baby wakes!

I get it. I really do. I’ve been there twice. It does get better but I think you are at a really tricky age (the hardest age even) and even if you did sleep train with sleep regressions, teething, separation anxiety and you going back to work I think you will just have to start again over and over. Would he sleep in your arms while you watch TV with your partner with the lights low?

@Thatwentbadly it is hard isn’t it, I just put him down at half 8 and he’s been awake twice already he just cries in the cot after about 20/30 mins sometimes and crawls around wanting picked up and I’ve always said he just wants comfort and I’ll always give him that but two wake ups within an hour every hour or two is really hard!

He maybe would but I’m not sure if he would just wake up after a wee while thinking it was a nap rather than bedtime

He sounds overtired to me. At 7 months I work off wake windows of 2.5-3 hours. Perhaps try and earlier bed time? I certainly wouldn’t go back to feeding at night if you have stopped. Good luck 👍

@MoorGirl my partner isn’t for the night feeds cause he also doesn’t think that he’s hungry he thinks he just wants held!

He could be overtired, he won’t nap longer than 40 mins in the morning and then a 30/40 mins in the afternoon! I could maybe try earlier bedtime I just always worry that he will wake up before we go to bed thinking it’s only been a nap!

The hard thing is with him waking so early after being put down I’m struggling to get anything done in the house like dishes and washing

I meant the not having time to yourself or with your partner because you have to keep dealing with your son waking all the time. I found that hard.

I swear by a solid routine for bed and both of mine have slept through since 3m (i thought DS1 was a fluke!).
Dd knows she'll have tea, we go up for a bath, ready for bed, bottle downstairs with 'in the night garden' and then up. She naps better in her cot then being held aswell during the day.
Is he in a sleeping bag? Both of mine started to sleep better in them. Dd has a chico bear, we put that on, snuggle her up with her blanket and leave. If she did kick up a stink, which is quite rare, i normally leave her too it for 5 minutes and if she's messing around or clearly not going to stop, we go in, lie her back down, dummy, blanket, bear on and walk back out and repeat. Its only if she REALLY gets herself in a tizz id get her out for a cuddle in her room, and then back into bed.
She loves her sleep and even at a year old, about 3.5 hours she starts getting grumps. She can miss her afternoon nap, but she gets a grumpy little madam and usually goes to bed early.

@Ruddyfedup that’s great that they’ve been like that! DS used to be great, he would do the same have his bottle and go down and only really stir for his dummy then go back to sleep but since the move to the bigger cot he won’t settle without being picked up! Maybe it’s too big for him but he’s too big for his old bed now haha

He does use a sleeping bag we’ve used them since he was the right weight for it I was never keen on blankets! I would wait 5 minutes but he does a proper sob type cry and I just can’t!