Night weaning tips (15 month old)

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Does anyone have any tips for weaning a 15 month old off breastfeeding at night? Preferably with no tears
He still has at least 2 feeds through the night, where he's actually drinking and not just sucking for comfort. He takes a dummy but when I pop it in his mouth at night he take it out himself and looks for boob, he also really cries when my DH goes in as is so used to me.
How did you night wean or did it happen naturally?

I gave mine water if they woke in the night. They didn’t need the milk as they were good eaters, it was just habit. They weren’t interested when it was water instead. They just started sleeping through.
If you woke up in the night and asked for a cup of tea and someone went and made it for you, you’d have it right? The same applies to night feeds. As long as he’s having enough milk and food during the day, and not having a growth spurt, give him water. He may look at you like you’re giving him poison, and it prob won’t work after just one night, but hang in there!

@BumpLoading I am pretty much in the exact same situation as you! We were going to attempt it last month as my husband has some time off but that coincided with him getting a molar and he started feeding even more! We are now back to normal but that's still averaging twice a night breastfeeds. Same as you - all hell breaks loose if my husband goes in or if I offer water etc. I've read that 18month onwards is a better time to attempt night weaning as they have a bit more understanding. To be honest I'm scared to attempt it at the moment...!

Thats interesting its easier at 18 months, maybe I'll wait a few months then!
To be fair at his yearly review the health visitor did say try water, but I'm a bit worried of trying it then waking him up even more and then being stuck with him awake and struggling to get him back to sleep.. but maybe that's me being a bit lazy

We did the disappearing chair method of sleep training. Fair warning, lots of tears the first night but we were beside her the whole time to shh and reassure her. After a couple of nights she slept right through.

@BumpLoading : I’m in a similar position with a 14 month old op. However mine is up every 2 hours, wanting to comfort feed mostly (there might be 2-3 actual feeds in that time) Have you made a plan/started yet?

@PlantDoctor : Did you intend to nightwean at the same time (ie intentionally not feed when they woke up) or did your child just stop waking for feeds?

When ds2 was 14 months and nighrwaking husband would always try to settle first. I only.went in and fed if he wouldnt settle after about 20 minutes. He slowly started settling for DH as he got used to it and the feeds dropped off

@SpiderVictim we did intend to night wean at the same time, yes, as she was 11 months and eating well during the day. I think she was only asking for a feed to get herself back to sleep (bf so it was a bit of a sleep crutch!)

I did CC for night weaning when DD was a bit younger than that. There were lots of tears, but the next night she slept 7-7, so...

Did it with virtually no tears but at 21 mo, @BumpLoading, can you '@' me if you want to know more. (wasn't quick, was all me)

@Harrysmummy246 I'd be interested to know please!

Ok, bear with me, it really wasn't fast!

DS had dropped day feeds himself by18 mo but was still waking a lot and boobing back off. I was more and more tired.
We started reading 'loving comfort, a toddler weaning story'. every day. And talking about Jack, the boy in the book and his mummy and the cuddling etc. Still just boobing and bedsharing on night wakes.
Basically this was preparation and we didn't even try to change anything for over a month.

Then, when it seemed to be having some sort of understanding when we were reading, I offered a cuddle instead on some wakes. Sometimes that and a backstroke/ share bed was enough. Sometimes not. I never tried more than about a minute before boob. Gradually fewer and fewer wakes that needed boob. Still some. Still me bedsharing.

Then about 21 mo, talked about mummy and milkies being so so tired and could we just cuddle instead. He agreed (well as well as a toddler can). So when he woke and asked, gently said mummy and milkies were tired but cuddled/ bedshared.

Didn't ask after 3 nights. Hardly any tears at all. Didn't stop bedsharing, didn't send DH instead. Just stopped boob. Gradually, his sleep improved anyway so it was later and later when he'd wake and I'd hop in with him. Then gradually that has reduced too- he either sleeps through or shouts for teddy/ tuck in and pretty much dismisses me (starts the night night, sleep well, see you in the morning routine phrases)

Then reduced the bedtime feed and stopped. That hadn't put him to sleep since about 11 mo anyway. Maybe about 30s fuss then decided he was more cross about not having a particular book.

It can be done with minimal tears, but has to be gradual and without pushing too hard- it was always more a suggestion than a 'this is what we're doing DS'.

@Harrysmummy246 that's lovely and such a gentle approach. I will look into that book thank you!

We just stopped cold turkey at 11 months. My husband went in 2 nights for every wake and sang, cuddled, comforted him back to sleep. 2 nights of this and he slept through.

Thank you @Lessismore2056

Worked for us, obviously not for everyone. Couldn't send DH in, the disturbance to us all was unbearable.

I also followed a kind of CC method at 13 months - laying down and leaving the room for six minutes then repeating for 8, 10 then 12 mins and so on. He had got down to one night feed (not bedsharing but in cot in his own room and not feeding to sleep) but then after a bout of illness jumped back up to every two hours and I had just had enough so went for it. There were tears and it was stressful but it was just the first couple of nights that were the worst and after a week he was sleeping through from around 7-5am. One thing I would say is it took quite a bit longer to get him to not be starving at 5am and expecting a feed when he woke! Now at 14 months he does around 7-6am. He hasn’t woken in the night for a good few weeks so now I’m confident if he did he must be poorly or something as before I was never really sure!

Oh also tried offering water and sending dad in prior to the sleep training but he would just go ballistic. During the sleep training, we took it in turns and I would say after a few days he responded better to my husband

@Harrysmummy246 that is such a nice way of doing it. I am still Bedsharing and night-breastfeeding my dd16mo and I hate the idea of controlled crying etc. My older two were dummy/bottle fed so it was very different.

@Harrysmummy246 could you please tell me what you did?!

@ulstermourne it's all explained in one of my older posts above- I could type it all out again or just say RTFT....

@Harrysmummy246

Ok, bear with me, it really wasn't fast!

DS had dropped day feeds himself by18 mo but was still waking a lot and boobing back off. I was more and more tired.
We started reading 'loving comfort, a toddler weaning story'. every day. And talking about Jack, the boy in the book and his mummy and the cuddling etc. Still just boobing and bedsharing on night wakes.
Basically this was preparation and we didn't even try to change anything for over a month.

Then, when it seemed to be having some sort of understanding when we were reading, I offered a cuddle instead on some wakes. Sometimes that and a backstroke/ share bed was enough. Sometimes not. I never tried more than about a minute before boob. Gradually fewer and fewer wakes that needed boob. Still some. Still me bedsharing.

Then about 21 mo, talked about mummy and milkies being so so tired and could we just cuddle instead. He agreed (well as well as a toddler can). So when he woke and asked, gently said mummy and milkies were tired but cuddled/ bedshared.

Didn't ask after 3 nights. Hardly any tears at all. Didn't stop bedsharing, didn't send DH instead. Just stopped boob. Gradually, his sleep improved anyway so it was later and later when he'd wake and I'd hop in with him. Then gradually that has reduced too- he either sleeps through or shouts for teddy/ tuck in and pretty much dismisses me (starts the night night, sleep well, see you in the morning routine phrases)

Then reduced the bedtime feed and stopped. That hadn't put him to sleep since about 11 mo anyway. Maybe about 30s fuss then decided he was more cross about not having a particular book.

It can be done with minimal tears, but has to be gradual and without pushing too hard- it was always more a suggestion than a 'this is what we're doing DS'.

Here we go @ulstermourne

I did gentle weaning with ds1&2. There were some tears but not many. They were both a bit older though (18-24m). It's what I'll be doing with DS3 when the time comes

Say "goodnight" to milk at bedtime. Offer water and cuddle at night. Wear a long sleeve high neck top. I would say things like ,"we can have milk in the morning" rather than "no milk".

I did this with mine at 18 months. I won't say no tears but I never left them crying and it was only the first few nights, youngest has just done this and has gone from 2-3 feeds per night, to sleeping from 7 to 6, morning fed at 6 and back to sleep until 7.30.

@BumpLoading

Thats interesting its easier at 18 months, maybe I'll wait a few months then! To be fair at his yearly review the health visitor did say try water, but I'm a bit worried of trying it then waking him up even more and then being stuck with him awake and struggling to get him back to sleep.. but maybe that's me being a bit lazy

That could happen for the first few nights so good idea to do over the weekend.

@User0ne and @HungryHippo11

Sorry, it's a zombie thread that @ulstermourne asked me to quote my own post for, OP is hopefully fine

@Harrysmummy246 sorry about that