Ever since the day he was born, my son has been extremely difficult. I don't resent him and I actually (annoyingly) miss him as soon as he goes to bed, I adore him and think he's fabulous. But he is so hard. Everyday is overwhelming. I cry everyday. DH is super involved and does a hell of a lot and he too is extremely overwhelmed. I feel as though I'm stuck in a revolving door and I know what's on the outside is horrendously hard yet I have no choice other than to go out to it every morning. I dread waking up. My second son is so placid and loving and independent, he barely gets any attention. We are awaiting an ASD/ADHD assessment however I'm not hopeful due to his age. Anyway, my question is, how the hell do we go on like this? I am constantly feeling overwhelmed then feeling guilty for feeling overwhelmed which results in me being even more overwhelmed. He isn't going to change so how do I go on like this everyday for the next few years? I'm so tired.