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Uncommunicative 9 month old

19 replies

Tinfoilmittens · 19/12/2020 06:56

My DD is 9 months old and I'm a bit worried about her lack of communication. Her eye contact isn't great. She will look me in the eye but only briefly, she always seems to prefer looking at her surroundings, toys etc and it's difficult to hold her gaze. It's quite difficult to get her attention in the first place really. She responds to her name around 25% of the time. I don't think she has hearing issues as she responds to relatively quiet noises across the room or from outside etc (will look up to see where it's coming from).

She loves peekaboo and finds it hilarious, perhaps that's reassuring?

She does babble and uses a good range of sounds, but only ever to herself. She never seems to try to get my attention and doesn't imitate at all, apart from smiles.

She also doesn't really like being cuddled, she'd much prefer to be exploring by herself. She is a real wriggler. I really want to look at books etc with her but she just wants to get away, she's not interested in the slightest.

All of this is making it quite hard to connect with her to be honest, it's like talking to a brick wall.

We have just had the development check with the HV and she wasn't concerned, because DD is doing well in every other area. Her words were that DD is "doing brilliantly". I still feel uneasy though and was wondering what more experienced mums think. She is my first so I am paranoid about everything!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Nix32 · 19/12/2020 07:02

She sounds absolutely perfect. You haven't said anything that would worry me.

Snapcat · 19/12/2020 07:07

She sounds completely normal. Also they change so quickly. Give it a month or two and she’ll be pointing and grabbing to get your attention.

OverTheRainbow88 · 19/12/2020 07:26

She’s 9 months old, relax.

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Ticklemynickel · 19/12/2020 08:09

Sounds fine to me. My DD wasn't a cuddly baby but is a very affectionate toddler. She wasn't bothered about books till after 1yo and then something switched and now she loves them.

Mas05 · 04/08/2022 03:07

@Tinfoilmittens hey any updates please?

WoundTheBobbinUp · 04/08/2022 13:33

Mas05 · 04/08/2022 03:07

@Tinfoilmittens hey any updates please?

Hi @Mas05, I am the OP but have since name changed. I was still very worried when DD was 15 months old - she still wasn't responding to her name even then. Strangely, as soon as she started walking she absolutely transformed and is now a very engaging, chatty 2 and a half year old! Absolutely no concerns at all Smile

Mas05 · 04/08/2022 13:40

Awww so happy she developed typically and a happy chatty baby girl. Thanks for your response. My baby boy who is 9 months old is same, no imitation of sounds and gestures. Eye contact is there but its not long. Hopefully its only me being paranoid FTM and nothing else.

Chzm · 16/05/2024 14:22

WoundTheBobbinUp · 04/08/2022 13:33

Hi @Mas05, I am the OP but have since name changed. I was still very worried when DD was 15 months old - she still wasn't responding to her name even then. Strangely, as soon as she started walking she absolutely transformed and is now a very engaging, chatty 2 and a half year old! Absolutely no concerns at all Smile

Hey OP, I hope you don’t mind me commenting on this thread again!

My 8.5 month old avoids eye contact, esp when I’m holding him and is showing similar traits. It’s reassuring to hear your baby is fine

Please can I ask, in combination to the above did she ever flap her hands when excited?

really hope you respond

thank you

Tinfoilmittens · 16/05/2024 18:27

Chzm · 16/05/2024 14:22

Hey OP, I hope you don’t mind me commenting on this thread again!

My 8.5 month old avoids eye contact, esp when I’m holding him and is showing similar traits. It’s reassuring to hear your baby is fine

Please can I ask, in combination to the above did she ever flap her hands when excited?

really hope you respond

thank you

Hi @Chzm, no she didn't flap her hands x

OP posts:
Mumof3bb1 · 08/07/2024 08:41

Hi @Tinfoilmittens
@Chzm
@Mas05
how are your little ones now?

Mas05 · 08/07/2024 10:58

@Mumof3bb1 Hi my baby boy is 2.5 years old and id developing fine. He started all gestures before he was 1 year and soon started imitation of sound also. The gestures aren't delayed till 18 months so they have a lot of time.

Mumof3bb1 · 08/07/2024 14:20

Hi @Mas05 aww that’s amazing! If you do remember what concerns did you have at 9/10 months?

Mas05 · 08/07/2024 15:21

@Mumof3bb1 He used to flap a lot, and was not doing any gestures other than raising hands to be picked up, was only imitating some actions but wasn't imitating any sounds. But i was concerned for things which wasn't expecyed from him yet. But within few weeks he started pointing, clapping and and also said 3 words, after 1 year he started imitating sounds and learning more and more words, after 15 months he learnt animal sounds and colors etc.

Mumof3bb1 · 08/07/2024 15:25

Hi @Mas05
I love hearing the positive outcomes.

So my son is going to be 10 months on the 13th he was born 3 weeks early, he sits well unsupported and will reach for toys but HATES being on his tummy, he just pulls himself back into sitting, has just learnt how to crawl and can pull to stand with ease, struggles to sit back down though, just stays standing until we get him back down.

he is not babbling like the other babies, makes occasional noises and screams but no babbles Ma, baba or dada.

His eye contact is okay ish, doesn’t copy us or clap, wave or point. EVERYTHING goes straight into his mouth, wants to lick and bite everything.

Sleeps and eats well, I feed him I can’t deal with the BLW mess🙈

He will bang his hand on table if I do it, and can bang two objects together.

I feel like a terrible mother and im at the very end of the rope. We read together, sing, babble, all day long.

when I make the mama movement with my mouth with no sound he copies that movement with his mouth but no sounds if that makes sense.

Smiles when he sees me/husband or other family members, can lift arms to be picked up and will use me to pull to stand up.

I find he twirls his arms/feet occasionally and kicks legs really fast when lying down, and stares at the door handles and lamp in my room.

I am at the end of my tether, HV seems to think I have health anxiety.

He has no separation anxiety and I feel he stares into blank spaces at times.

will smile if I say smile, and looks at where I point at times, 70% will look when I call his name, if he isn’t engrossed in something.

Will watch me do the actions to heads shoulders, knees and toes but can’t mimic any songs or actions.

will lift arms up to come to me or my other family members, if he drops a toy will look where it’s fallen.

my main concern is lack of babbling and the no gestures!

Sorry for the long post!

Mas05 · 08/07/2024 15:32

@Mumof3bb1 he seems on track, babbling isn't delayed till 10 months so he still have time, spend time saying mamamama dadada etc. Other stuff he is doing all age appropriate, the only gesture which is expected till 10 month is raising hands to be picked up which he is doing and only imitation expected is if you bang a toy and he bangs it also which he is also doing. I can understand what are you feeling as i went through this also, but have patience they will do everything on their time

Mumof3bb1 · 08/07/2024 15:54

@Mas05 yeah it’s the babbling which scares me the most and the eye contact, I also find he stares up a lot too🙈

Mas05 · 08/07/2024 16:06

@Mumof3bb1 for babblinh he has 10 months and 30 days time to do, so he still has time, his eye contact sounds fine as he looks at you, and babies stares and you have mentioned that he looks at you if he calls you most of time unless he is busy playing or doing stuff so thats fine, i have read that you have mentioned that he looks where you pint which is a advanced skill tbf.

Mumof3bb1 · 08/07/2024 16:26

@Mas05 I thought babbling was bang on 10 months. Yeah he glances over then carries on looking around. He will look where I point most of the time. How old is your little one?

Mas05 · 08/07/2024 16:56

@Mumof3bb1 He is 2.5 years old now and totally typical toddler :) if he is lookingbwhere you pint then that is advance and soon he will start pointing, i would suggest just point at everything

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