A dummy for babybero? Really don't want to give one, but SIDS advice is confusing me.

[berolina]

ds1 never had a dummy. We did briefly and half-heartedly try one when he was 6 or 7 weeks, but he was having none of it and in retrospect I'm really glad. The FSID recommendation wrt to dummies wasn't yet out at that time. Now ds2 is a month old and thus reaching peak age for SIDS. We follow all the other guidelines religiously, and I really dislike the idea of a dummy - not primarily because of snobbery, it just somehow doesn't sit easily with me. I also dread the weaning him off it and am a little concerned about interference with bf, which has gone like a dream so far. Besides, I want to bf him to sleep (yes, I really do) and not settle him with a dummy. This would mean literally only giving him it when he is asleep - and it is advised against reinserting it during sleep. But I can't help thinking that if the worst did happen would I forever be asking myself what might have been if he'd had a dummy? The studies show a consistent protective effect, but OTOH the mechanism is unclear, and how far is the fact of being bf to sleep protective?

Anyone else been through this dilemma, and how did you decide?

neither of mine wanted dummies and i wasn't about to force one on to them. If you are already following every other SIDS guidelines the risk is already v. low. I wouldn't give it a second thought, forget the dummy and concentrate on other things.

Yeah - some kids just don't want a dummy.

No big deal really.

Our DS is 18mths so we have missed the worrying about it but I have to say the first thing I saw when I read the new advice was to think, oh the manufacturers have been pushing their products again.

My personal take would be to ensure that my DS slept on his back in the same room and was never in the company of anyone who smoked and I wouldn't worry about dummies. I mean one minute they are saying no dummies, then they are saying yes but only if they use them all the time. I wouldn't imagine it makes the slightest bit of difference and if everything is going well, then well done you !

Thanks everyone. rookies - yes, I was a little when I saw FSID's link-up with a dummy manufacturer, but I do really respect FSID and figured they have to get their funds from somewhere...

dh (psychologist, so knows a fair bit about studies) is not concerned. I just can't help thinking of the worst case and wondering how I'll then feel

The protective effect mainly holding for last sleep (= increased risk if hey don't have it for one sleep) is also puzzling.

Message withdrawn

Yes, if I bf him to sleep is he not being in effect 'settled to sleep with a [natural] dummy'?

One of the studies (yes, I read them) also made the point that most dummies fall out within/after about 30 mins.

Am confused.

My mum used to be a paedetrician ( and I can't even spell it before she retired).

We agonised about moving DS to his own room because I was getting so little sleep.

She said the main factor about SIDs was sleeping on their backs and when that was introduced cot deaths dropped dramatically.

For most other things it is an implied link based on what happened in actual cases. thats why I am quite blase about dummies.

yes, as I understand it the dummy thing is an association (albeit a strong one) but without proven causality. My instinct is very, very much 'no dummy', but we all want to protect our children in whatever way we can, don't we?

I hate these kinds of dilemmas.

I would go with your gut instinct beroline, you sound like a fab mum and I think its one of those things thats just not worth worrying about, not that it stops us !

I wouldn't give a dummy to a baby who is perfectly happy without one.

thank you (aw rookie ). Think I might have a word with dses' paed (are in Germany, every family has a paed here) first, and maybe ring FSID and see if they'll give more info, but it is looking like no dummy tbh.

If there's no other reason for you to want to use a dummy then I wouldn't bother.

I' say no dummy.
I DID give ds one, as he really wanted one (honest, he loved it!), but had horrendous nights when it fell out and he couldn't resettle...

Does then new advice say that dummies are not recommended? It used to be that they allegedly reduced the risk, but if you forgot it or whatever 1 night, the risk was massively increased.

it does say on the sids website don?t force your baby to take a dummy if he or she doesn?t want it. They also have a link with the studies that were done and do state that No dummy or soother manufacturers were involved in funding any research into the links between dummy use and SIDS.

Dunnies - Q & A

My dd (4) didnt want a dummy and I didnt really want her to have one either. My ds (1)had one for around 5 months but started waking multiple times for it so I took it away and he sleeps much better now.

Dummies - Q & A

Berolina - I have never liked or used dummies. I do feel dutybound to use one for the baby (when he/she arrives!) from about one month. I just cannot, not now.

I will use it furtively though!

as many know i lost my ten week old grandson in december to cot death ,we are now blessed with three week old baby granddaughter we are following every guide line recommend by cot death foundation we are using a dummy ok they dont look nice but dont want any risk the dummys we use are recommened by sids and are nearly four pounds a pack of two and only 10p goes to sids not much is it

ggg, hazy Thank you for posting.

Thanks everyone else too. Still haven't decided - am procrastinating, which I know is not good . but he's only just one month.