Is this level of terror and emotion normal...?

[Gardeniaofdelights]

Hi everyone. My baby is a week old, and an absolute dream. I feel like I’ve been waiting for him my whole life.

I’m just wondering, when does the feeling of terror settle down? I feel like I am scared all the time - that he will stop breathing, that he’s hungry, that he’s not feeding enough, that he’s too warm, that he’s not warm enough, that he’s growing up and I have to learn to live with him never being this small again, and then just a general anxiety that something terrible could happen to him.

Does this feeling of being so completely raw fade? I love my baby so much and I really enjoy every moment I spend with him. I just wish I didn’t have this background fear that I somehow won’t be able to protect him, or that something bad will happen to him

It is completely normal and yes it settles down :-). Your hormones are rampaging at the moment and they'll settle down in a few days. Just try and look after yourself as well as your darling baby - keep sleeping and eating when you can and treat yourself gently.

Oh, I remember this well! 13 years now since I had my first & I remember coming home from the hospital with her. It was like an out-of-body experience! It was the same house I'd left a few days before, but it felt like an entirely different world.

It was surreal & God, yes, the terror.

As badpuma said, a lot is hormones & also the overall life-changing nature of having a baby.

It does settle down! Congratulations & good luck 😊

Give it two weeks. If you still feel at that point that the level of fear is taking away from your enjoyment of your baby, speak to your HV about the possibility of PND or PNA.

Worrying is normal. Worrying so much that it stops you enjoying your child is not. Wait til the hormones have settled down, and then have a think about how you're feeling.

Thank you everyone ❤️ I’m glad it’s not unusual, but will also keep an eye on it to be sure it settles.

I remember coming home from the hospital with her. It was like an out-of-body experience! It was the same house I'd left a few days before, but it felt like an entirely different world.

This is so exactly it! Same world, but everything is so different now.

I remember that fear so well! I did end up with PND, so as someone said above make sure to talk to someone if you still feel extremely anxious in a couple of weeks.

Congratulations on your baby!

I remember this fear and it escalated really quickly (I had PNA). It developed into an intense fear of me dying. Let the HV or midwife know how you feel - one of the strategies they may ask you to follow is to encourage you to come to them with any health anxieties. There’s a local mental health hotline they can provide you too when you just need a chat.

Debilitating anxiety isn’t normal. I refused to sleep as I was worried if I did my DS would die/disappear. This wasn’t normal and I was diagnosed and medicated for anxiety and depression.
Being anxious is pretty normal but utter terror isn’t. I couldn’t leave DS in another room and after not sleeping so I could watching him 24 hours a day I eventually collapsed. I wish I had got help sooner. If this sounds like you please speak to your midwife. It can get better. X