my dp is not my ds1's dad, how do I tell him???

[generaldogsbody1]

There was a thread not so long ago about this subject but I cannot find it, please give me the wise opinions of MN, I need to make DP see that it should be done sooner
rather than later. DS1 is 5 and has not asked the "where do babies come from" questions.

I answered on the other thread. I wa stold at the age of 11 and it was devestating By that yime I wished I have never been told so please tell him when he is younger rather than older x

can you do a link to the other thread?? I can't find it. I want to show it to dp, too make him understand?

So you and DP got together after DS was born?
Can you talk to him generally about your past? In that my DS is quite interested in where DH and I met, where we lived before he was born, how old we were etc. could that be a way of introducing the idea without coming on heavy about who "daddy" is. Have you got any photos you can show him to talk about when you and DP got together?

Sorry if I've got the wrong end of the stick again.

my dh didnt find out till he was 23years old and we found out by mistake, as his parents had never told him It has driven a wedge between them. Please tell him early, it really is better, and there will never be a right time.

peaches, DS knows how we met, and i think he kind of knows that dp isn't his bio dad. But how do i know for sure? We could go to registrars office and have dp put in the empty space. My concience says that is really baaaaad. Please forgive bad grammer but am piissed

www.mumsnet.com/Talk?topicid=7&threadid=405250#8240653

So if dp can be put in the empty space, can that be a really exciting occasion, to make it clear to DS that DP will really be his daddy, even if not biologically? And gives you an excuse to really talk to DS about it? Sorry TBH I have no experience of this, have just butted in on this thread, but a friend of mine recently adopted his new wife's 5 year old, and the judge made such a big fuss of it. The family all got dressed up and had photos taken. it was lovely.

ta much magnolia, and peaches will deffo show dp this, and the other thread,. What about just puting him on ds1 birth cert? Is it really so baaaaad?

Hey gdb, g'mornin!

So you mean just quietly putting DP on the birth certificate and pretending that he's the biological father? I'd guess that won't do you any favours in the long term. Though I wouldn't call you baaaaaad LOL.

What are you thinking now you've slept on it?

i think its bad your suggesting decieving ds and i think what is illegal. These things always come out in the end, especially if extended family know.Best be honest with him. Has your dp adopted ds? maybe consider that then he came really have a birth cert with his name on.
lisa