Returning to work advice

[Elly88]

So I'm currently on mat leave with my 2 month old, not due back until June. But my manager is leaving and I'm next in line for her job, but would mean returning to work in Feb when she's only 4 months old. I know I'm going to hate leaving her and feel like the worst mother in the world. But I've waited for this job for 11 years now so don't want to miss the opportunity. It would be 4 days a week, after having my eldest I only did 2 days a week. What are others experience if going back early or more full time? I'm hoping my mil will have her 3 weekday rather than nursery so she's more comforted by a familiar face and able to nap in her own bed etc, the 4th day I do on a weekend so dh her dad has them both. Equally I don't want to regret not spending that time with her while she's little, though with currently 2 under 2 I feel work will feel like a holiday 🤣 Meeting with boss tomoro. Help! No judgement please just experiences and advice, thanks

Take the opportunity. She won't remember and I think will enjoy the time with family. You're doing what's right for your career

Thanks for being my only reply! Haha. And thanks for the advice :) you're right she won't remember, I just worry she won't bond as well and will miss me initially. But I guess that'll always be the case whenever I go back and she'll grow up not knowing any different? Just crap I have to put either career or motherhood first, I want both 🙈

@Elly88 agree. Take the job. There are advantages of this too - babies that do more babysitting time (non-parents) are more independent and you are likely to have less issues when starting the nursery. Also better to do it at 4m than a bit later when the anxiety kicks in and the baby totally refuses to leave your side. Good luck!

I applied for a new role while on mat leave - they actually waited for me to finish mat leave before I needed to take the position. Would they let you start after mat leave?

In the country where my children were born you only get 4 months mat leave. I went back 4 days and just made sure the day I had on my own with them was a quality daY. Good luck

I went back when my baby was 2 months, out of choice and financial necessity. Everyone questioned me but it was the right thing for us. She’s now 16 months and a wonderful healthy securely attached toddler. No regrets and I will be taking similar with my next baby. Take the job.

I went back at 12 weeks but on a wfh basis so I could juggle breastfeeding.
We were in a nanny share after dd1 and the other family relocated so it was either lose the nanny or go back so she could be paid for. I hadn't been there long enough for enhanced leave.

Is wfh an option for some or all of it? It gets much easier after 16 weeks, and once weaning starts easier again.

DD2 was mix fed from birth though - bit prem, very jaundiced and no interest at all in the effort of feeding. It may the transition initially a lot easier but the odd day in the office was tricky as expressing her feeds was a faff.

What sort of role is it? Office culture? Family friendly or unlikely to make any accommodations?

I would take it too. The long term benefits for you professionally sound significant.

I went back at 3 months - we did shared parental leave and my DH took over.