Don't know where to turn

[JenC87]

8 month ago I had my LG the pregnancy was a shock as I had the coil & was talks about womb lazering. I have a ds who is 9 I love my LG but I'm finding it hard my son was in a routine by 6 weeks old but no matter how hard I try I can't get my daughter into a routine. She was born at start of lockdown so has been with me constantly pretty much I can't walk out of a room some days without her going hysterical she won't sleep at night either. I have tried the let her cry but she really upsets herself and also at 3 in morning I have my son to consider I love her to nuts I really do but I feel like such a failure with her I recently went to get her weighed and discuss her nappy situation (poos constantly and always runny) I was basically told I was over reacting and told in future if I need loo take her don't let her cry I just don't know where to turn its currently 3.34 in the morning and she's climbing in her cot refusing to sleep I just want to sit and cry

Hello! Fellow mum of a six week old here. I'm going to type a longer comment, but wanted to send this ASAP so you know you're not alone in being awake.

I'm here with you too. With a very wide awake, crawling around 10 month old

Some babies just need you more than others. My ds wouldnt leave me. Can you get a carrier?

OK, so take a deep breath, head downstairs, switch a lamp on and a radio on. Maybe even the TV. Do you have something sugary (biscuits, cake)? If so, eat some- I find it really takes the sting out of being up this early. I've got a 2 year old upstairs and my baby has started having parties from 2-4 a.m. recently. I find being downstairs helps make things seem less onerous.

So, routines. What you've got to remember is that babies are different. What worked with one will not work with another. My first was exactly like your second- I just couldn't put her down. My second is a dream by comparison (two hour parties at 3 a.m. notwithstanding!), and I'm telling you now- it's not down to anything I did. Babies are different people, you can't control the way they act. All you can do is roll with the punches as best you can. I find people with easy babies tend to take credit for it as if they believe it's their parenting that's made their baby easy. It's not. Luck of the draw I'm afraid, as you've discovered here.

6 weeks is tiny- your little girl is still in the fourth trimester (Google it) and her behaviour is totally normal for her age. She is far too little too be left to cry- doing this is damaging at her age. Studies have shown it can cause attachment issues.

Don't be so hard on yourself, or on her. This, too, shall pass.

You are not alone. My little one is 9 months old and I've found the last month or so particularly tricky with sleep - she's crawling all over the place, wanting to stand up and then there's teething. This is all just a phase. Now I'm in the one wide awake and she's been fast asleep next to me.
If you need to leave her to cry for a few minutes while you sort yourself out, it's not the end of the world. Having a baby in the middle of a pandemic is such an achievement - we've come so far with so little support. Don't think you're a failure because you're not.
If you have concerns about her nappies - see if you can speak to your GP rather than your health visitor. It might be worth going and speaking to them about getting you some support too. What sort of things has she been eating?

Ooh, hang on- misread your post, I think. 8 months old? Disregard the comments pertaining to 6 weeks olds!

With babies, all sleep is a phase. I find it ebbs and flows as they age. Don't worry, they all get there in the end.

Do you have a carrier? My 5 month really likes to be held so I put her on my back when doing dishes etc. It really helps. You're not a failure she's just more high needs than your last baby. I have baby chair by bathroom for loo trips!

I'm up with my 9 month old right now. Well she's fallen back asleep lucky thing but I'm still up!
Sending op

You’re not alone, it’s so hard. I have a 12 week old and I can’t imagine having another child to take care of too. Your doing an amazing job and the best you can. I don’t have any advice really but please don’t see whoever you saw in that appointment again, ask to see someone else. Such unhelpful comments and you’re not over reacting.

I second the bouncy chair in the bathroom idea. I have a padded changing mat she lies on (it’s a bit easier because she can’t roll or walk) but she loves coming to the bathroom now.

WOW I didn't expect this response at all thankyou to each and everyone of you sometimes just writing things help it sounds silly but putting this post up has lifted a weight I absolutely love my daughter she is such a character I honestly couldn't imagine her not been a part of our lives but she is so full on and there is an 8yr gap between my 2 and they are so different I think we kind of expect things to be the same.

In regards to her nappies I am weaning her I give her a mix of foods she preferred proper food to baby dinners but she has only had 1 solid nappy and that was a day when she refused her milk I've tried to get in with our gp but they are not doing appointments unless it's an emergency I rang a few week ago when she wasn't taking her milk and was constantly throwing up they sent me to A&E without even seeing her.

I would love to put her in a bouncer but she is at that stage now where she wants to be off always trying to climb and stand so a bouncer isn't ideal she barely naps during the day and when she does it's 10mins at most

But knowing I'm not alone is a big help

I think there is a sleep regression at 8-10 months? not fun DD just nearly out of that oh god ive been a zombie..

Shes generally clingy and too attached to me(DH is jealous) well i think its because of covid and all childrens centers are closed.

My son(3.8) is better with sleep and routine but DD is the one who will happily go in a cot so babies are different.

Ive no advice as I am just barely hanging on but hugs to you, you are not alone