What to do at 4-5am

[JKDcot]

Hi

My 5 month old often wakes up at 4-5am and after his bottle and nappy change if needed he behaves like it’s morning/get up time. I can’t sit and play with him as I need to rest and I don’t want to engage him as if it’s time to be awake. But I can’t get him back to sleep for at least an hour

What do I do? Can I leave him safely in his bed kicking about? Do I have to sit up with him the whole time and wait for him to tire out?

Thanks

When does he have a previous feed? I'd go for a small feed in the dark and no eye contact or nappy change then down back in his bed.

Is he happy in his bed or will he cry if you go back to sleep? If he's quiet then I'd leave him to it.

I have the opposite problem, mine will go back to sleep after the 4am change and feed whereas I'm wide awake, perhaps we should swap 😂

My DSIL had an stupidly early riser, sorry, but she never found the solution to it, other than she went to bed really early herself to make sure she had enough sleep, until they were old enough to understand staying in bed in the morning.

I put mine in our bed then. He will sometimes then settle back to sleep, other times will have a soft comforter toy to chew in semi dark and usually happy another hour.

In his cot if he’s not tired will just roll over and cry.

it is hard isn't it?

I followed the idea of night time = quiet, dark, feed in dark, no eye contact, no playing, no nappy change unless essential (and even then, how about changing it at previous feed and then it will last?)

If they wouldn't sleep, I took them into my bed and was cuddly, but not 'fun' until morning.

When they were a little older, I used to give them their cuddly toy and say, Shh it isn't morning yet and tuck them back in. Again if they wouldn't, they came in our bed and it was boring.

All mine eventually slept through til 7 regularly, but I have to say, I don't assume it was my method at all!

I think you can play with bedtimes, and feed times, and they still wake early and want to play. Sometimes, you just need to give in and go to bed early.

Either back in cot if happy enough by themselves or in bed with me. I can't deal with being awake at that time!

We had a long period of 5 am wakes. Brought her into bed with me and put peppa pig on and dozed until about 6.

That’s a good idea to put him in bed with me, he just tends to kick about, chew his hand, make noises. He only cries when he’s then over tired. I just then am so tired in the day. I can’t deal with being awake pre 6am...!

Thank you for the suggestions

Does he need a nappy change??

I would keep it all very dark and quiet and put him back to bed.

I used to do it with DD when she fed between 6-6:30, back to bed so i could get some sleep!!

I used to treat any way before 6/6.30 as a night wake and not take him out of his room, even if it took me ages to get him back to sleep. If baby isn't crying, I’d leave to roll around and go back to bed!

This is giving me horrible flashbacks to DC1 (who is now 13 and sleeps like a log). She would wake at 4am at this age and not go back to sleep. It’s very draining isn’t it?

A couple of things helped (or at least, coincided with things improving!). She woke later when she moved into her own room, and also moving her afternoon nap earlier seemed to make her wake up later the next day (counterintuitive I know).

God I remember this. Painful. Mine was worse in our bed - never been able to cosleep, finds it too exciting - so I used to make a little bed for myself by the cot and sleep there holding her hand. Made being awake more bearable if it was snuggly and comfy.

She’s now nearly two and doesn’t nap at all in the day, yet still wakes at 5am regardless of how late she goes to bed. We’re counting down the minutes until she’s old enough to understand a Gro Clock 😴

Can you change him earlier even if he doesn't really need it, so he'll fall asleep then and not need changing at 4am and hopefully be easier to get to sleep?

I'd try to avoid the nappy change if I could - also if he is happy in bed then I leave him there. I left my DD2 for 40 mins this morning, she just chatted away to her teddies for a bit 🤣

I'd avoid the nappy change too, if my 6 month old wakes for a feed at that time I feed him and pop him back in his cot where he is quite happy to chat to himself until he nods back off or it's time to get up.