Anyone with a under 1 year old working full time?

[PriceEmUp]

What’s it like?

DD is 10 months old and I’ve been offered a job- it’s working from home and it means I’ll have some disposable income again. I’ve found a childminder who sounds good and I’m planning to meet soon.

I’m not sure how I feel about leaving DD all day for 5 days a week. I’ll only be seeing her while o get her red din the morning, then for about an hour and a half in the evening before she goes to bed. Sounds stupid but I don’t want her to forget who I am or our bond to change if I see her less often?

Has anyone done it? It’s is awful?

I don't know yet but this will be me next week (although I'm only doing four days but full time hours).
So far DD (10 months) hates the chileminder and in-laws who will be sharing looking after her and I'm so so so worried about it. She's so attached to me and I just hope she will settle for them as I'm now the main earner and I have no choice but to go to work.
How is your baby being left with other people?

DD went to a childminder at 8 months. She took a week or 2 to settle in but now loves it there- especially the interaction she gets from other children. I personally love it too- I get to use my brain, be an adult and drink hot tea all day and then our time together at evenings and weekends is very precious.

I’m on mat leave with number 2 at the min but I did it, although my hours were compressed over 4 days and I work mon-thurs. DC1 loves nursery and always has and has a day with GPS/dad/auntie. It’s hard but doable. Outsource where you can (cleaner/online shopping etc) batch cook/slow cooker meals so we can still eat together in the evening then the time you do have is just for You and family. The time you have off with them is precious and I’m much better at the fun stuff when I have had my adult time. Also staying in work had other advantages for me such as a promotion not long after returning from mat leave with DC1 so it allows us to have a nice lifestyle. I had bad PND and returning to work and rediscovering ‘me’ massively helped so I perhaps found it easier returning to work than many do.

@PriceEmUp

What’s it like?

DD is 10 months old and I’ve been offered a job- it’s working from home and it means I’ll have some disposable income again. I’ve found a childminder who sounds good and I’m planning to meet soon.

I’m not sure how I feel about leaving DD all day for 5 days a week. I’ll only be seeing her while o get her red din the morning, then for about an hour and a half in the evening before she goes to bed. Sounds stupid but I don’t want her to forget who I am or our bond to change if I see her less often?

Has anyone done it? It’s is awful?

I am looking for work and put my 10 mo into nursery f/t for 3 days. When I find a f/t job he’ll probably go in for an extra day and Fridays we’ll spend juggling his care around meetings or with family. Honestly he has come on leaps and bounds since starting nursery - he is now talking and has expanded his vocabulary so he can clearly ask for his favourite things.

He is much more comfortable socially around other children his age. He has also started expressing an interest in using the potty & tells the ladies when he wants to poo and so the nursery will try him on it to see if he’s ready to start potty training.

Honestly I would say don’t feel guilty at all. He will have a blast at childcare and you can focus on time together at the weekends.

Thank you. I do feel a bit better knowing I’m not the only one and you’re children haven’t become de-socialised savages since being left ;)

With DD being a lockdown baby too I think she’s just been so used to only having me there and limited to where we go and what we do so it’s going to be so many new things for her to take it.

@zaffa DD is fine being left with family to be fair. She’s a very happy little girl and has a good bond with the people that surround her. I think my worry lies more with me missing her so much than her actually having any issues as she will probably love it there.

@PriceEmUp when I did my KIT days DD went to in-laws but for the first four DH was at home and used to take her out for the day. I would clutch onto her so tightly when she came back because I had missed her so terribly - she didn't care though! She was all 'off, Mummy! I have toys to play with'
It sounds like your DD should be ok then. Mine just really hasn't settled at in-laws or childminder yet and I do worry about that. I did my last six KIT days from in-laws house just so I could be there for her but I wonder if it was the wrong thing to do In the end and just getting her used to the routine overall would have been better for her.

I went back full time at 7 months and my daughter went to a childminder. She loved the childminder and formed a strong bond and they became like her second family. But her bond with us didn't suffer at all she went term-time only as my husband us a teacher and she adapted fine to not seeing the childminder in the holidays. She stayed with that childminder till she went to school (she also did a couple of days week at pre-school when she was 3) and I credit that childminder with part of the person she's become. Her care, teaching and discipline were amazing and my daughter is now doing amazingly at school. I'm pregnant again now and I'd love a longer maternity leave or to be part time after but I know if I can't them my child won't suffer.

I went back full-time at 5 months - DS is now 9 months. Slightly different for me as we did shared parental leave and my husband is at home, plus with the pandemic I’ve been WFH and can have lunches etc. with the family. Even so, there has been no impact on our bond. He’s always delighted to see me when I come downstairs to say hi!

Most people i know go back to work at 9 months and baboes go into nursery full time, and everyone is fine

Can't relate

I do condensed hours and have Wednesday as my day off then it’s only 2 days at a time where she’s in nursery

Went back at 9 months- ok I did have a half day at home for a year during the wk before fully being back full time. Pros and cons to all things. My commute was my time- my an iPlayer and a croissant- bliss! Then I got home right at the time for bath story and hug. I chose her clothes in the morning and we did lots at the weekend. Also to add 1-2 yrs old was very draining and being at work provided relief, it’s not like the first year which was all gurgles and coffee shops for us

I went back to work full time when DD aas 3 months. She's a year now, still breastfed, and our bond is absolutely perfect, in my opinion.

Yes mine was 7 months and I went back FT. It’s hard at that age but then when they get to about 18months you can’t wait for Monday to give them back again!!!!

Haha thanks everyone! Sounds like we’re all going to be just fine.

To the poster who’s revealing in her full time stay at home mum with her wine emoji... I hate you (@livelaughlovemykids) or maybe I just envy you!

I’ve been back full time teaching since DD was seven months old. Only see her for half an hour in the morning before dropping her off and about an hour in the evenings if I’m lucky, then have to get her in bed sharpish because I have at least another three hours of work to do every evening.

It’s maybe a different situation because her grandparents have her four days a week, but despite how little time we have together in term time we have a very close bond. She adores her daddy, who also works full time, and I.

I’d love to be able to spend more time together but sadly paying the mortgage is also fairly important.