Terrible sleep at nursery

[rachelphoebemonica]

Hello,
My 13 month DD old started nursery about a month ago, she's settled fairly well, but she barely sleeps there and it means she's really overtired by the time she comes home that the bedtime routine is quite stressful and she goes to bed early so we hardly see her :(

She started off better and would do around 2 x 30-40 mins naps which is fine, but now we're lucky if she does 1 x 30 min nap. At home she'll do 2 x 1-1.5 hour naps a day like clockwork.

I'm not really sure what I'm asking! I guess has anyone has a similar experience? I appreciate it's probably fairly common and it's a brand new environment.
If anyone has had this, did it get better? Did you ask the nursery to do anything differently?

TIA!

My baby is a lot younger (6.5 months), but his naps are terrible when hes there. At home he'll have 3 naps (a short one in the morning, a long one over lunch and a very short one in the afternoon). At nursery he has a lot short 30 mins. He still sleeps the same amount of time, but the quality of sleep isnt great.

Its got better the longer hes been there, occassionally going for longer naps.

I didnt do anything about it specifically though.

@Letsallscreamatthesistene thanks for sharing your experience, hopefully it will get better over time

Yes, same here, ever since she started at 12 months (she is now 2). We just tend to get her to bed about 6 or 6.30, and prioritise her nap on a Saturday to help her catch up. She's becoming more able to cope with it now she's been back a while, and before lockdown was the same, she was getting better at dealing with less sleep.

I think this is really common. The environment is very stimulating and novel but it might improve with time.

My baby was 11 months when she went back to nursery after lockdown and would only nap for 30 mins initially. She's now 15 months and will nap for up to 1.5 hrs at nursery if her keyworker pats her back every time she stirs.

We coped with the lack of day sleep by instituting early bedtimes on nursery days. She seemed to cope okay with it and she still keeps her normal nap routine on non-nursery days.

You'll get there in the end - they're quite adaptable.

Thanks everyone. I think I'm mainly worrying as it seems to be getting worse rather than better, the more she is going. I don't hunk it helps that they have a little buzzer and go into the room every ten mins to check on the babies. I totally get why they do this, but I think it really disturbs her.

Hi OP I really sympathise as we had this in November last year when DD started nursery (she had just turned 1). I remember thinking it was awful and really stressing but the staff always reassured me it would get better - and it did!

For the first few weeks she wouldn’t sleep and barely ate , but it did gradually get better and she eats and sleeps like a dream now (most days!).

She struggled to settle in the cot room - her poor keyworker used to spend ages trying to get her down. We sent a sleeping bag in from home which helped a bit, but it improved when she got a bigger and started napping out with the older littlies on sleeping mats.

Bedtime was a nightmare for the first month or so as well - a mixture of over tiredness and separation anxiety. That fixed itself in the end too though.

She still only manages an hour sleep at nursery most days and sometimes less. She always sleeps better ant home and has at least 1.5hrs plus, but she’s almost 2 now so can manage on a bit less.

How many days is your DD in nursery?

How long has your DC been there for? My DD started nursery at 9 months and it was around the 12 or 13 month mark when she finally dropped down to one nap a day at nursery in line with their 'routine'. She would sleep 1-2hrs but mostly around the bottom side of that. She was only there 3 days a week, the other days she would have a morning nap of 1-1.5 hrs and a late PM nap of around an hour. So she did sleep more at home. Like your DC she was an absolute nightmare in the evenings from collection, this was the case between the ages of 9 months and probably about 16 months I'm afraid because she just wasn't getting the sleep she needed and was soo overtired and didn't have much ability to communicate that in any other way than screaming!

So my advice would be, firstly their sleep will improve at nursery once they're settled in, but it is unlikely to mirror their sleep at home, so they'll probs still be overtired. And it will improve again as they get older and start needing a bit less sleep. In the meantime, it's just one thing you have to ride out and it will pass!

Nurseries are often quite loud unless they have a separate sleeping room which is rare. Is she maybe ready to drop to one nap per day? If she’s more tired when she goes down then she may sleep deeper and not be as disturbed by the other kids. What times are you getting them to put her down?

She goes in 3 days a week. I think they've been trying to put her down later to get her more tired and do a longer nap in the middle of the day, but i think it's backfired as she gets overtired, and ends up not sleeping at all or doing 15 mins.

I asked them on Thursday to put her down a bit earlier (around the time she'd go down at home which is 3 hours after waking up in the morning), and she did 30 mins then and 30 mins in the afternoon, which is pretty good compared to normal when she's there. I think if she does that then it's okay as at atleast she's getting some rest both in the morning and afternoon, even if it's a lot less than when at home (usually around 2.5 hours a day).

I don't think she's ready for one nap a day but do agree when she gets to that stage it'll make things easier.
She sleeps in a cot room there but they do have mats and she has once done a 15 min nap on a mat. I also send her in with her grobag and comfort blanket.

Thanks for sharing your experiences it does make me feel better :)