Nine year old wet his pants today

[TheWashingMachine]

My super intelligent nine year old wet his pants today after school in the car on the way home. He is very embarassed and I've tried to brush it off but I have had to clean the back seat of the car, and his booster seat cover, his school clothes and insist on a bath. He said he forgot to go to the loo this morning when he got up, and because it was cold got straight into his school clothes, then he forgot to go at school then they had two hours sport this afternoon. I despair, he is so clever and sensible but sometimes seems to inhabit another planet, does anyone else have a child like this? He isn't particularly anxious at the moment, although he is highly strung, he just forgot. He has no SEN that we know about.

Don't let your comments about his intelligence filter through to him, so what he forgot to go. Unlikely he'll make the mistake again.

Maybe he didn't forget, maybe the new rules at school (if they're like my sons school) mean that toilet times are restricted, my ds is only 5 but every day is desperate all the way home because he's held it in for so long, and other mums at school have said their kids have had accidents when they have never had that issue before

What are your other concerns about his behaviour? There seem to be other issues or your response is a little on the harsh side really.

Lots and lots of children struggle occasionally with remembering to go to the loo. Right up into secondary. I recall a 13 year old peeing in the middle of the classroom. She genuinely hadn’t noticed until it was too late.

I would be being kind and checking that there aren’t toilet avoidance issues going on. If it happens again ask him to go to the loo more regularly than usual and see if that helps.

Yes my dcs school had become stricter about going to the toilet this term. Generally though, schools get a little stricter as the kids get older and expect them to go at break and lunchtime rather than lesson time.

I recall a 13 year old peeing in the middle of the classroom. She genuinely hadn’t noticed until it was too late.
Sorry, that is absolutely not just something that happens. It really isn't.

Why keep mentioning his intelligence 😂 is this a weird stealth brag?

I would be concerned that he feels uncomfortable using the loos at school. My kids hate using the school loos and I know they hold it... not good for them. I would ask him about this, it may be the case.

My DH’s 8yr old nephew had a poo accident when I was looking after him In a soft play, it was one of those enormous venues where the toilet was miles away and I found him sulking in a corner, could smell it instantly and sent him into loo to clean himself. He was mortified and I tried to keep it not a big deal while my 4yr old all the way home was saying ‘what’s that smell? It wasn’t me’. I gave him bags to put trousers etc in and I was shocked at how this could happen and how unable to clean himself he was, I didn’t expect that at his age. Although saying that I remember peeing myself when I was probably 12, probably for similar reasons to your son. Also intelligent

OP this really isn't a big deal, unless it's a regular occurrence.

My 11yo son is like this - doesn't have accidents but often a close run thing. He just doesn't prioritise going to the toilet & leaves it to the very last minute a lot of the time.

Don't worry, it's fine & so is he & it's not kind to call him a 'space cadet' 😞

Ah no julia I didn’t mean to suggest it was. But it also isn’t muddleheadedness or just being away with the fairies

Mine hated the school loos at that age. We are a small household and he wasnt used to wee on the seats and other unmentionables. So he held it in all day. I felt really sorry for him but I didnt know really what the school could do. I genuinely think that teachers have enough to do with teaching and duties, and it is not the job of support staff to clean toilets. So who does during the day? So for the first time this year I will say #bekind. It's OK.