Does anyone want to talk toddlers with me?

[Sighing000]

I'm really missing random toddler talk. No one in my family or friends has young children right now, and with there being no baby clubs at the minute I'm seriously lacking mum friends. I really miss the little things you learn from other parents.

Please come talk about your worries, brags, tips or random tidbits?

I'll start, DD is 17 months. I'm worried about her speech, we're discussing it with the health visitor. But she recently said Dada! Amazing to hear.
She loooooves to dance, the girls got serious rhythm already.
Also we've decided to ditch the high chair and use a mini table and chair instead. It's be one day but I'm loving it.

DS is 20 months and has about 3 words! He can follow simple instructions and is able to mimic actions but speech is not his thing yet.

My DS has just turned 2. At 17 months he said practically nothing but his speech has exploded in the last month. He chats away and copies everything I say now. Such a relief!

He's very cute around other children we meet in the park and playground. He likes being around other children but can't talk very much with them so he just follows them and smiles and laughs so they make friends! He loves climbing and is very brave!

I'm very happy to talk and talk about my todder - he's great!

@sighing I wouldn't worry too much about the talking, they all come on at different stages. I remember my DS not talking much and now he doesnt shut up 🤣 He has just turned 2 and everything is "don't like"
I feel like lockdown improved his speech as all he had was me to talk to.
He goes to nursery a few days a week which has also helped his potty training - though he's been doing it for about 3 months - think he just likes taking his pants off🙄

Is anyone else's going through the stage of tantruming by hitting themselves when they're told no?
It's stressful he doesnt like to hear no 🙄

My son will turn 2 at the end of the month, not much of a talker (unlike his older brother) but he seems very happy and understands everything. Nursery and HV are not concerned about his speech.

He is obsessed with cars and watches them out of our living room window, we also have to sit in the car on the drive while he stands on the seats and shouts car and plays with the indicators and we listen to the radio.

He attends a forest school nursery and loves spending time outside and its like having a big blonde Labrador that needs lots of walks and food. Totally different to his older brother and I can't believe how strong he is.

@beakyboo my DS is the exact same. Sometimes we just sit in the car and he amuses himself by pushing buttons or buckling himself into the car seat.

He also comments on every driveway we walk past with "car" or "no car"

My DS is 2yrs and 3 months and swings between absolute angel and utter demon! He gave up his nap a couple of weeks ago and some recent days have been fraught. He spent most of last Friday screaming, and then was lovely all weekend and yesterday. Today hasn't been so good but nowhere near as bad as Friday...

One of our main issues is that he wants to do everything his older sister does, but she's 6 and quite often doesn't want him involved! And of course the moment she wants to play with him, he refuses and runs off. But he gets angry when he can't do it or she won't let him, or it doesn't go how he wants it to. Zero patience, there. They do play nicely together sometimes, and when they do it's the nicest thing to see.

Our other issue is that he never, ever stops talking. Ever. I thought DD was bad but he's worse! It's lovely having a chat and understanding (most of) what he's trying to tell us, but some days he needs an off switch.

He's a lovely boy really - car obsessed, very loving (if a bit clingy to me) and the funniest kid I've ever met. Doesn't mean I'm not counting down the days until he starts preschool, though

Hello! I have a 2 year old (27 months) DS. He's recently potty trained and thank god it's gone well. I was so happy to say bye bye to the nappies!

He's got a lot of words, which is fantastic, but it means he argues and answers back. It's driving me crazy! Even his childminder has started commenting on his behaviour recently which is stressful. We're very strict with him, he has a naughty seat, we don't accept bad behaviour, but of course he's only 2 so what more can you really do?! (help me).

@Sighing000 I love the idea of a little table and chair. We still use a highchair as it's pretty big, but maybe we'll look into something like that when he grows out of it.

My ds is 2 and a half - born the same week as Prince Louis, did anyone see that little clip of him asking what animal (amamal) David Attenborough likes?? Ds is not asking those sorts of questions yet or putting together those sorts of sentences. He's stating facts of about 4 words "look the bus is coming" or "where's my juice gone?" But not questions like that. That's made me panic a bit and I keep telling myself that Louis was probably quite robustly coached to ask that question (I hope!)

It's so great hearing all these stories! I know it's a cliche but they really are all so different at this age aren't they.

@Abouttimemum that is so interesting and reassuring!! So did your little one not nap in the pushchair before? I think my daughter has managed it maybe twice in her life 🙄 to be fair we used the sling for all her naps when she was little so she was never in the pushchair much and these days we generally use the car as we're in the middle of nowhere. She will occasionally drop off in the car if I miscalculate timings, but only ever for half an hour and is then overtired so I try to avoid it (plus just as you say I need the break!).

I'm really hoping to break down her thing about other kids by getting her to a few toddler groups - she has been a bit better since peak lockdown ended and I've been taking her to the park a lot, think she just needs to get used to other little ones again. Then if I can just sort the separation anxiety and the sleep thing we'll be grand! Seriously though I think you're right - at some point we will just need to bite the bullet with nursery and maybe she'll surprise us by adapting better than I think.

I just feel so jealous when I see mums with babies/toddlers who are super chilled - just fall asleep wherever, love new things, happy with anyone, already making wee friends, leave them in the pushchair for half an hour while you chat to your friend at the coffee shop etc etc... that has never been my baby! She's so intense- but she's also hilarious, smart, affectionate and beautiful (if I say so myself) and I feel guilty for wishing her other than what she is. Motherhood is one emotional business eh!

@Jennyz123 No, he had to be held for all naps until about 3 months because he had severe reflux, once we got that medicated he slept in his cot no bother at night but his daytime naps were always 20-30 minutes and either in arms or occasionally if he was shattered in the car. At about 7 months I started putting him in his cot for naps to try to lengthen them which worked and about a month later he started napping for longer periods. Now at 18 months he has a couple of hours at lunchtime. He just loves his bed! And honestly I love it too as I get a lovely break. Plus he hates noise and light so that’s the best place for him. He has never in his whole life napped in his pram or pushchair. Until he started nursery!

He will nap in the car now if we time it right, for example if we’re going away we’ll set off at nap time and he’ll usually sleep for most of the journey. I haven’t tried in his pushchair since he’s been napping there for nursery as I cherish my two hour break in the day.
I was really worried about it all but I needn’t have been. Little ones do adapt when they need to and they deal with this stuff all the time at nursery.

Oh my DS was the same, he was super intense and still can be very stubborn. I used to think the same when I see other mums when he was younger and their babies would be happily napping while I was wrestling with mine, or necking a hot cup of tea while he slept for 20 mins. But it’s swings and roundabouts and they’re probably dealing with their own different issues. No little ones are perfect, they’re their own little characters!!

He honestly sobbed every day for a couple of weeks at drop off and then all of a sudden he didn’t!

@Abouttimemum that's amazing- our sleep 'journey' was virtually identical! I was one of those genius parents without a baby who thought that babies with rigid sleep routines had just been cosseted too much and if you got them used to lots of noise early on they'd fall asleep wherever. It's probably true for some/maybe even most but definitely didn't work for us! She slept beautifully anywhere and everywhere for 2 weeks but then developed the most horrendous colic (screaming the house down from 6-10 or sometimes midnight) and was also diagnosed with silent reflux. She would only nap on us and we used the sling to extend the naps/get her to sleep at 6 when she would otherwise refuse and be inconsolable. Once she started napping better the colic resolved- I'm convinced it was overtiredness in her case.

I think a lot of my anxiety comes from a failed attempt at sleep training when she was 4 and a half months. Looking back she was far too young but we were desperate- I had to go back to work at 6 months and she wouldn't nap anywhere other than the sling - I couldn't ask her grandparents to cart her about for hours several times a day to get her to sleep. This 'sleep consultant' promised that she used gentle methods and we would only leave her to cry for a couple of minutes tops. In reality we sent voice notes on WhatsApp and she just always responded saying the cry wasn't intense enough and not to go in. My poor baby was left all alone for an hour and a half screaming in the dark before eventually passing out for half an hour. We were meant to do it for 3 days but halfway through day 2 I told her to forget it and we'd have to figure out something else- I am so ashamed it took me as long as that but I couldn't bear having put all of us through that for nothing. By that point though my baby had completely lost her voice and went hours with no wet nappies - I still can't bear to think about it.

After that I tried my own version- patting and singing in the cot while she was calm but leaving her for a couple of minutes if she started trying to play, going back in after a couple of minutes of crying. She started managing 45 mins in the cot (as opposed to the 3 hours she would do in the sling 🙄) but gradually it extended and now she won't sleep anywhere else!

Writing this down (I do apologise for the rant!) actually makes me understand a bit more why I'm being so precious about sleep now. That was the first time I felt I'd seriously failed my baby and I don't ever want to feel like that again. But at the same time I can't let my fear stop her from doing something she would really benefit from- it's SO HARD!! Hearing that your baby manages is amazing- everyone else I know has babies that just sleep wherever so I can't gauge how doable it is to get them to change. You have given me so much hope, thank you!

@Jennyz123 the chance are she will settle (and sleep!) so much better at nursery than you think.

I remember it used to take us forever to put my daughter down for naps but she would sleep great at nursery (this was at about 9-10 months). I asked her key worker what her trick was and she said “Oh we just put her down and walk away”. No tears, nothing - my daughter would just go to sleep! I couldn’t believe it!

There were tears for the first couple of weeks she went on drop off which was hard, and again when she went back after lockdown at 14 months but only for about a week and now (18 months), she talks about the friends she is going to see and walks in without a second look back.

It really is so often a harder transition for parents than for children x

@NewMum0305 aw that's really encouraging thank you! The negative part of me says it would have been easier if we'd started when she was younger but the other part of me thinks in some ways she's much better with change these days- she HATES it to start with but then adapts more quickly than I often think she will. I'm kind of hoping that she'll be so shattered after playing with all the fun things at nursery that she will just fall asleep like your little one!

How does everyone get their little ones to keep hats on? I've just ordered DD a Balaklava style wool hat in the hopes that will help. Now it's getting colder she needs to keep it on!

DS (22mo) has never tolerated hats but hoods he's fine with. Sorry that's probably no help!

My two year old will usually keep a hat on for a short while before he pulls it off. I used to casually stick it on his head while we were walking along and he was distracted, but now he's a bit older I talk to him about the hat, tell him his head will get cold or wet without it, and then put it on and it's far more successful. Sometimes I show him his reflection in the mirror so he can see the hat and he's usually thrilled!

I also try not to stress if he won't wear it, unless it's baltic and then I do my best.

@themosthappy I saw that clip and I'm pretty sure that prince Lois was parroting a question he was told to say. You can't be sure but a two second clip.... my daughter asks lots of what questions, 'what you doing' her favourite but also if we say I word she doesn't know. I've got a summer born two year old, she's a chatterbox and enjoys doing jigsaw puzzles. We also like going outdoors and collecting nature. Mine is not sociable at the playground. She's ok if introduced properly or sitting on the swing next to another child, smiling away. But if someone is behind her when climbing, she freaks out, normally calls for a cuddle but yesterday actually screened and cried. We are at that dropping naps and overtired monster at 4pm stage but sleeping 10-12 hours at night.

Ah no she hates hoods too! Last winter she had the cutest little bobble hat and loved it. I'm crossing my fingers that it was just summer hats she dislikes

We have a bear hat with ears which she really likes, although it is a struggle even to keep that one on! I'm intrigued by the balaclava style.. let us know if it works! Gloves we may also need to work on.

My DS is 15 months currently cutting his 12th tooth! He's been a trooper with teething so can't complain on that one!
He is like spider man. He's climbs everything and I mean everything!
He says a few words like mummum, dada, nannan, unny for funny and ok and I'm pretty sure he says duggee! He says ok the most! 😂.
Few tantrums here and there as expected haha!

We have a hat shaped like a strawberry which DS loves. He sometimes wants to wear it to bed although I usually sneak it off at bath time. I suspect it's all about getting the right hat!

At home ds will only nap in his pushchair if walked in a specific route, but at nursery they all just lie down in the corner and sleep. It blows my mind.

Hi guys, agree that hats are a minefield. My little one enjoyed her summer hat for a day, then refused to have it anywhere near her for the rest of the summer 🤷‍♀️ she is in love with her new winter hat though (which is lucky because so am I- two pompoms 😍) - maybe they don't like the feeling of something on their head when it's hot but are ok with it when it's colder? Or maybe it's because she loves saying 'pompoms' over and over and over..

Very excited here, had a bit of a breakthrough at the park yesterday! She's been getting better and better at being alongside other kids since taking her to the park more and yesterday she said a 'hello' unprompted by me, and held out her handful of sand for a little boy to see - 'sand!' And then later 'hello!' And 'I sit down!' to a wee girl! Sadly neither child was remotely interested in her conversational efforts but I was so proud- she's come a long way from screaming her head off every time another child looked at her a couple of weeks ago 🙈 long may it last!

Trying our first toddler group since lockdown this morning. I am absolutely dreading it- I think she will hate going into an unfamiliar room with loads of screaming kids but fingers crossed I'm wrong - and it's the only way to start getting her used to normal life again i think. Wish me luck guys and a non-scream filled morning please- am bricking it!

@StrawScarecrow we also have the strawberry hat, we actually have the whole outfit, was it from h&m by any chance lol? But even that doesn't stay on her head. We're still waiting for our new one to be delivered.

@jennyz123 So exciting about her engaging with others! I hope baby group goes well. None of ours are open yet, I think DD would really benefit from "talking" to some other children. We saw a little boy in a cafe yesterday, could of only been 14 months at most saying Jam, Toast, Mumma, Yum. It makes me oddly jealous lol, but she did say mumumum this morning. Not directed at me but still, it's progress!

Hi @Sighing000, yes yesterday was amazing! She absolutely LOVED the baby group, was singing and dancing the whole time and definitely would have been up for chatting to the other babies at the end if I had let her (we were on socially distanced mats so unfortunately neither of us were really able to chat to anyone). It was so great though seeing her adapt to a new environment with no bother - especially one full of screaming toddlers! Not a single tantrum for the whole session, I was so smug 😀 (we'll gloss over what happened when it was time to tidy up the toys and then leave without going in the park visible from the baby group car park but still).

Today on the other hand- we started the day with me scrubbing the extra long-lasting lip gloss she'd managed to coat her ENTIRE face in (if you ever find yourself in this position I highly recommend Vaseline 🙄) and she's been tantrumming on and off pretty much since. After the lip gloss debacle we went out to a coffee shop and she said 'dog woof' as a cute wee pug went past. The lovely old lady owner had the audacity to try to show her the dog and tell her its name - cue horrendous screaming until the lady backed off terrified. So my hopes that she might be getting semi-civilised were a bit premature it seems!

I know everyone says this about their speech but it's true - so often they say nothing at all and then it all comes out! My little one showed no interest in talking but as soon as she started she didn't stop - it's like she'd been concentrating so hard on learning what the words meant she forgot to try saying them! It's so hard not to worry but they are all so different at this stage - lots of the little ones I know the same age are not talking at all, some are but are struggling with something else - I think there is so much for them to learn at this age that each child just prioritises something different!

@Sighing000 no I knitted it myself and bask in all the compliments!

I'm not convinced that they learn much from other kids myself. DS's language acquisition has been pretty slow, he's 2 next week and has loads of words now but only just putting sentences together. He is at nursery but I really think he learns more words from us. Ready steady go is the only nursery specific phrase I've spotted.

I find structured groups easier than toddler groups- we do a football for toddlers that ds loves. Less screaming and no fighting!