Finding being a parent exhausting after 11 months - will it ever feel easier?

[Jessicatmagnificat]

I have a lovely DD, who is now 11 mo. In a lot of ways, I find being a mum much easier than when she was a newborn, but other days, if I'm being honest, I find it boring and tiring. DD is going through a stage of being unsettled at night, and seems generally frustrated and moany a lot of the time (maybe due to teething). Obviously, she is still totally reliant on me for feeding, changing, entertainment etc and the responsibility feels relentless.

My question is this: does it get easier than this, and if so, when? Or does toddler behaviour make life even more difficult? I think I want someone to reassure me that one day I will go to bed confident of an good night's sleep and wake up raring to start the day and not have endless battles about (her)eating something healthy and constantly worrying that she might be ill.

I found 18 months to be a significant turning point with both of mine: They generally slept and ate better and were ill less often. Each stage has its challenges though, but being able to have a full night's sleep does make you more able to face the things life throws at you! I hope things improve for you soon. BTW by the time your LO is walking (v soon!) you will not have time to be bored and then when they start talking it's magical. Lots of love CB XX

Hi, it does get a lot easier. I found this age so hard as I just didn't know what to bl do with myself. I felt guilty for getting on with my jobs and ignoring them just sat there in their bouncy chair, felt guilty about the housework when spending my time entertaining them, god just felt so damn bored and guilty!

You sound tired to me and just going through a rough patch. Tis hard work though and I'm sure others will agree. Just what do you do with them? I used to walk alot in the park and find places to go, just found a change of scene a help.

yes it will get easier, but every time it gets easier for me i go and have another one! if you are finding it a struggle entertaining her all the time make sure you get out every day to toddler groups or something so you are not having to constantly think of things to amuse her. she might also sleep in the afternoon if she does something tiring which can help with routine.

Yes, you will. You really, really will. The nights improve. They start to talk. The physical impact of pregnancy and birth recedes. Toddlers can be tough but they can also be absolutely enchanting.

I have two daughters now four and six. I cannot tell you how easy life is, in comparison with when they were babies; they talk, they chat, they sleep, they have their own lives. And they're as adorable as when they were 11 months old too, just in a different way.

jessicatmagnificat, I can sympathise. All you can do is think these things will pass.

Also, I am lucky enough to be a WOHM and I love getting out of the house and going to do other things. My daughter is crawling but only wants to walk, holding onto my hands, so we walk, walk, walk around the flat, into the kitchen, into the bathroom, back into the kitchen, stop to look at the door again. It's so boring! I honestly think SAHMs and nannies are heroes.

My daughter went through a particularly bad patch at 10 months which happened to be when we were on holiday. It was a nightmare. All she did was cry and want to be walked, by me, not by anyone else. She was up at night a lot as well. Partly she was unwell (teething) and unsettled but partly I am just not used to being with her so much!

She's a lot better now as she's got a few more teeth and seems to be becoming a lot more mobile this last week or so which is taking the pressure off.

Anyway, I like to think that every day that passes takes you further away from these challenges (and towards new ones but a change is as good as a rest)

I enjoy the fact that I no longer bf, or sterilise bottles, or have to wind her, or have to hand feed everything. All these things are little steps towards the independence you're hoping for. Soon I won't have to carry her all the time or walk her. One day I won't even have to dress her (but then I'll have to spend time arguing with her about what she's wearing).

Sorry - long rambling post.

margoandjerry -spot on!

It does get so, so much better, in my admittedly limited experience, from about 18 months on - they start walking, they get more and more self-sufficient at playing on their own for short periods or just playing more interesting games that you can join in, and they start talking which as others have said makes a world of difference. Plus it also gets easier to get out and about as you don't need quite so much stuff (bottles, special food etc). Then you can go and ruin all the progress by having another one.

I found parenting intolerably knackering for the first 2 years, if I'm entirely honest. My son is approaching 3 now, and is getting a bit easier, mainly because he isable to entertain himself for longer periods and to play with other children quite nicely (most of the time!) so the focus isn't solely on me to cater to his every need 24/7. I still find his 'non nursery / toddler group' days quite knackering, and the bedtime routine thing shatters me sometimes, but it definitely has got easier as he's grown up and I've got more organised and used to being a mum. xxx

it does get easier as they become more independant, then you will get broody and want to go through the whole nightmare again

Lol Piccalilli couldn't have put it better myself

The physical exhaustion diminishes a very great deal but the worry/strain/angst/anxiety increases.

Yes, it gets better, and IME 11 months is a very difficult time.

As other posters have said, it gets much, much better around 18 months.

It does get easier in so many ways. Of course, you have additional stresses but I don't think they totally outweigh how much easier it gets.

Mine are 6 and 3 and we took them to their cousin's soft play birthday party at the weekend. We carried nothing except my small handbag. We sat and chatted and had a drink while the children played. They ate the party food that was provided and drank out of the ordinary cups and did not spill. The only thing I had to do was assist DD at the toilet when she requested to go. Sorry for wittering on, but I was just trying to prove my point. Of course, they are still gorgeous and funny as well.

it does get easier and the love grows as that happens.
Its still exhausting but once you get to the stage where they can talk and listen(if just a little bit!) Thast makes life easier for negotiation