Just need to vent really.
Third baby is 16 weeks old. She's beautiful, smiley chatty, just started to laugh. But I am finding this SO hard going.
She was diagnosed with CMPA at 8 weeks old, so we had 8 weeks of constant, non stop hysterical painful screaming and we didn't know why until a friend suggested it might be the allergy. Every single night I'd just sit and sob. Because of this she's never fallen asleep on me, I couldn't cuddle or rock her it just made her scream.
She did sleep well, but this week she's now waking up at 4am every night as well as her usual night feed which is between 12 and 3. She wakes at 4, thrashing and writhing around and nothing works to get her back to sleep until I get her up, put lights on and leave her on her playmat until she crashes at 6. If I try to get her back to sleep she cries, I've tried it tonight for an hour patting her and my older two children have now been awake since 5.
She has no pattern to the day, when I think she wants milk she doesn't or will randomly scream taking an entire bottle even though she's hungry. If I think she's tired I'll put her down for a nap but sometimes even if it's only two hours since her last feed she'll be starving, so more screaming. I feel totally out of tune with her needs, she doesn't give any early hungry cues and it's totally unpredictable.
I love her but she's so exhausting. We haven't had anyone look after her since she was born and I feel so drained. Have used headphones, white noise, lots of winding her, bouncers, swaddles, a baby carrier. She just seems really sensitive which is just how she is but it's unbearable sometimes. I barely get time with my other DC and although it's getting better I never imagined that with my last child I'd spend every day counting down until she's not a baby anymore 