5 month old overnight with grandparents

[NEAKT5]

DS will be 6 months on 8th December and I suspect that OH has booked a surprise night (I hope only one night!) away for my birthday at the end of November as he has hinted as when it’s okay to leave DS with my mum.

I’m feeling a bit guilty about the thought of this, in case baby needs me and about possibly not seeing him on my first birthday as his mum, of course I don’t actually know this for sure but if I know my OH I am certain it is a night or two away. But on the other hand some time just the two of us sounds great!

When did anyone first leave baby and how did you feel? He sees his Nanny two or three times a week just now but I’m always there too.

Babies are allowed in hotels op. If you aren't ready take dc with you. Do not allow yourself to be bullied onto it. Your night will be rubbish if you re worrying about your dc... We went to Milan and took dd with us. Slept no problem at all. We still went for a meal and she slept in the buggy next to the table!

Single mother here. My mum was line a second parent. She stayed with me a couple of nights when we came home from hospital. Helped at night etc. She stayed over when D's was 2 weeks old and I went out on New year's Day night. She stayed till the next morning. Might it be an option for grandparents to come to you? Ds was maybe a couple of months when he stayed over at hers. Like I say. She was very hands on. If yours sees yours 2/3 times a week then that'll be similar I'd have thought. However. Do you want to go away? You won't enjoy it if you'd rather not know. Nobody wants surprise outings at that time!! Much discussion needed with your do I'd say.

I left my baby overnight when he was 4 months old. I really, really didn’t want to leave him but it was my DP’s cousin/ best friend’s big family wedding and DP was best man. Babies weren’t invited to the wedding, though they were willing to make an exception for us which was very kind of them, though I didn’t think this was fair to their other friends with babies and/ or children. I also knew DP wanted a day of drinking and that I’d be left to look after DS on my own, surrounded by a load of drunks! My DS ended up staying at our house with my mum. I was comforted in knowing that he was at home, surrounded by his own things and able to sleep in his own next to me cot. It was was difficult OP, but my mum was so great I don’t think he even know I was gone! He was absolutely fine OP and you will be too. Though having said all that, I haven’t left him overnight since...

There's no right or wrong age or time. Everyone is different & it largely boils down to your own thoughts & feelings.

I breastfed both children so staying away from them was difficult as I had to express. They took a bottle fine but I was in pain & uncomfortable. Our first overnights with DS were at 5 months but it was our wedding & he was just in another hotel room with GPs - I was up at 6am both mornings feeding him. Overnights after that weren't often but were when we were going out for an occasion. Then when he was 1, he stayed out more for the benefit of rest for tired parents & fun for DS & quality time with GPs. They've all missed it so much since lockdown (he's now 2.5 yo)

DD is 11 months & never stayed out but this has largely been due to lockdown & EBF.

My first born slept through from 6 wks and wld sleep 12-14hrs a night. She first went on a sleepover at grans just a few days before her first birthday. We should have done it sooner but I still worried about leaving her and was glad to go bk late morning the next day and get her! She was fine, she woke up once in night and went bk to sleep but wouldn't go down as normal at bed time.

My second is nearly 10months. She still wakes through the night and I don't think would settle again with her gran or worse she wld be hysterical. She will not be staying over with anyone for a long time yet. I don't think she'll stay overnight till she's 18-24 months. Wish it cld be sooner but she's just not ready and I wouldn't be able to enjoy myself with worry!

You'll know yourself whether you think baby and gran will cope. Don't feel rushed in to it if your not comfortable. It is fab to get a night away but also worrying. I kept looking at my fone as I asked mil to txt me when she was sleeping. She text me at 10.30 to say she was still awake 😮 finally went down after 11, she usually went to bed at 8!

My grandson is now 8 months old and he has come to me once a week since he was 5 months . He is absolutely fine . My daughter is happy to have such a well adjusted baby . Do what you are comfortable with and enjoy your birthday.

My ds6 went to a 'sleepover' last week.
Had it go collect him at 9.30pm as he wanted his own bed!!

None of my many dc slept out until they decided themselves they wanted to. I did ask ds when he would want to sleep out and he said 100!!

Thank you all for your replies. I think it’s totally fair that everyone is different, my baby sleeps really well so I would hope that wouldn’t be an issue. We are leaving him for about 3 hours at the weekend with my mum as we have an appointment outside the city so I will see how he is with her then.

I think I may just have to speak to my partner and, without ruining his surprise as this is something he has always done for me and I don’t want to change who we are as a couple completely now that we have a baby, just find out if there is an option to take DS if I didn’t feel ready to leave him when the time comes!

@Sunnydaysstillhere aww how funny, I can’t wait till he’s old enough to tell me that haha!

My little boy is 6 1/2 months and has stayed with my MIL overnight 3 times since I stopped breastfeeding at 4 1/2 months. My son does not yet sleep through and wakes at least once or twice a night. Sometimes I need the break and the solid block of sleep. My fiancé works lots of hours so most of the nights fall to me.

@RosieGirl27 I understand that, my partner does a mix of day and night shifts and it is hard to do the nights yourself when they aren’t sleeping through!

We left DD1 at 6 weeks, for a weekend of semi work for me.
She was fine. GPs were a little ragged though!

I left DD1 with my mum around 9 months once she was sleeping through. DD2 is nearly 2 and never slept without me, not even with her dad. There's no right answer, everyone is different. Would say 1 night max though for the first time

6 weeks for one night.

10 weeks for 3 nights

Isn’t this against the government guidelines? Unless you are in Scotland or Wales then your baby shouldn’t be within 2m of your family. I suspect from tomorrow the local lockdown rules will be made national and no socialising will be allowed expect as approved venues eg you can go to a gym class but not to someone’s garden or to a restaurant. I don’t want to bang on about the current situation but you may need to factor this into your planning.

@Lockdownseperation

Isn’t this against the government guidelines? Unless you are in Scotland or Wales then your baby shouldn’t be within 2m of your family. I suspect from tomorrow the local lockdown rules will be made national and no socialising will be allowed expect as approved venues eg you can go to a gym class but not to someone’s garden or to a restaurant. I don’t want to bang on about the current situation but you may need to factor this into your planning.

Support bubble

That’s good. Hopefully support bubbles will be allowed to continue as it’s extra difficult for people living on their own.

@Lockdownseperation yes I’m in Scotland and I also don’t know for sure that this is happening it was just a moment of wondering what other people did with their baby but at the end of the day I think it’s to suit every person and their family so I almost wish I hadn’t asked.

And if things change obviously we will be following the lockdown rules as I have done since day one when I didn’t see any family members and my son didn’t meet anyone until he was over a month old.

I’m sorry if I offended you that wasn’t my plan at all. I hope you enjoy your time away.

@Lockdownseperation thank you, I also didn’t mean to offend I think it’s just difficult with lockdown and I think everyone may be feeling a little judged from people even if we aren’t.

One week old for 2 nights then again at 4.5 months.

@Laaalaaaa thank you, I’m waiting until my partner gets home from work tonight and we’re going to discuss it so will find out more then but I think I’m feeling okay to leave him for a night now as long as it’s not too far away.