How to teach my toddler about strangers, young and old!

[E551]

Today we were at a farm park type thing and there was a large bouncy castle type thing in the ground that my 2 and a half year old toddler went to play on. She was happily jumping around and was approached by 2 girls that were aged probably around 7. They were all bouncing around and then one of the girls grabbed my daughter’s hand and started to lead her away off the bouncy thing. I was shouting my daughter’s name to get her attention and to tell her to come back to me to which she would turn around to look at me but the other girl was holding her hand and taking her away so I ran up to them and then the other girls parents were shouting at their daughter. Anyway the girl was leading my daughter to the swings which were in the next park but out of sight.

It has shook me up a bit that if someone was to just hold my daughter’s hand and lead her away she’s too innocent to go against them! Even when I’m shouting at her to come back! Yes she was being taken away by a child so not as harmful, but she only met this girl literally no more than 60 seconds prior!

How do I go about teaching my toddler about not going off with anyone that they don’t know? Child or not. I did have a word with her after and explained she needs to ask people she doesn’t know to let go of her hand and to say she needs to see Mum or Dad but I kind of regret not having maybe a more stern word at the time, in front of the other girl. But I don’t know what’s right or wrong in this situation to be honest. Has anyone experienced this before?

You need to be supervising more closely to stop this happening. She’s two. She’s more likely to be subject of harm from those close to her than other children.

@Finfintytint

You need to be supervising more closely to stop this happening. She’s two. She’s more likely to be subject of harm from those close to her than other children.

I was actually standing around 3 metres away from where the ground bouncing pillow thing was, my daughter was at the centre so was a bit further than 3 metres but this is where everyone else was jumping. Adults weren’t allowed on the bouncing pillow. I don’t want to be one of those over protective and over cautious mums so do allow a bit of freedom, but in sight, so when I saw another child, albeit an older child, communicating with my daughter I wasn’t going to shout at my daughter just yet. However as soon as I saw this child taking my daughter off the bouncing pillow at the other side, that’s when I started to shout and then started to run towards them when they carried on walking. I mean I actually don’t know how I could have supervised closely without standing next to my daughter, but wasn’t allowed because adults weren't allowed on.

Tbh at this age all you can do it keep a perm eye on them and keep repeating “you never ever Go anywhere without daddy/ mummy” - once they are older you explain stranger danger, lots of videos etc online. There was a v good experiment where a man told 5-7 yr olds that he lost his dog and could they help. The parents were in on the set up were shocked as their children “knew” about waking off with strangers.

Yes, I explained to her that if someone she doesn’t know holds her hands and takes her away from Mum or Dad that she needs to say no and to shout for us. But obviously I don’t and will never take my eyes off her, even in friends or family’s homes I always watch her so she doesn’t hurt herself, it’s exhausting but got to be done. My partner hates it sometimes but I’ve definitely stopped a few accidents from happening!

Definitely scared me a bit because you don’t realise really how innocent they are until you see something like this happening so definitely want to make sure she knows the importance of never going away from our sight with a stranger, but she won’t quite understand it just yet so will carry on with watching her like a hawk.

There has been a move away from "stranger danger" to "clever never goes". Might be worth looking up that info to give you some pointers. You've already started it with never going with anyone without asking Mummy or Daddy.
Sorry you had a scare. Glad you were close enough to do something about it.

Yeh it’s constant and Terrifying - understanding definitely won’t sink in for a few years

I agree that there probably isn’t much you can do except keep a very close eye - at two years old a child can’t be expected to fully understand the dangers of going off with someone.

From the other side, a seven year old is also quite young. If they were playing with your toddler on the bouncy castle, it might not have occured to them that it was inappropriate to take her off the bouncy castle. Toddlers should have a parent watching then it isn’t a problem.

Thank you, will definitely look it up. Never thought something like this would happen, even though may have been innocent, but never worth the risk is it.