How to deal with 5 year old’a table behaviour

[Gulpingcoffee]

Our only chance to really eat together as a family is on the weekends and we’ve got into the habit of doing a proper cooked meal For lunch as the kids are hungriest then and more willing to try new things. Our younger child eats absolutely fine but our nearly six year old has become a pain in the backside at the table. He doesn’t like a large range of foods and if he doesn’t like what’s on offer he grumbles, moans, signs and huffs and takes so long we’ve moved onto desert and it’s the younger ones nap time. It all gets so stressful and boring after we’ve prepared a nice lunch. Today’s wasn’t even particularly offensive: pasta with vegetable sauce and chicken followed by apple cake. I’m at the end of my tether with his behaviour. I’m all of the school if that’s what’s on offer and if you don’t want it don’t eat it kind of thing (play it cool) but the moaning and whining is getting to us. Any tips on how to deal with it? He loves a picnic type lunch of sandwich or crackers and cheese, chopped fruit etc but that’s what he’s been having every day at school and I want him to have one proper hot family meal together at weekend without bloody carrying on about it!

Try to be as relaxed as possible about it. Don't watch him while he eats or cajole to eat more.

He isnt going to starve if he doesn't eat much at that one meal.

I would put one thing on the plate that you know he will like and one thing he has to try. Try only has to be a mouthful, if he hates it don't force the issue.

It also sometimes helps to involve kids in the prep and serving themselves. DD is always more willing to try new foods if she's helped to make it as she feels proud of her work. I get her to stir things, tear up lettuce, use a butter knife to cut mushrooms or other softer fruits and veg.

We’ve got very similar with our five year old. We’ve taken the firm route of offering something fun/he wants to do (watch YouTube) after lunch, but making it clear it’s conditional on eating without whinging. He gets 3 chances, 3rd moan means YouTube or whatever activity is cancelled. First couple
Of times he kicked up a massive stink when we went ahead with the consequence, now he’s learning. I do also involve him in choosing food, helping cook etc wherever o can get him interested.

Thanks for the tips. It’s not that I want to be draconian ‘eat what you’re given’ it’s that the moaning and huffing is so distracting that we end up not enjoying our own lunch, it kind of ruins the atmosphere. It’s so hard to ignore but I know we must try harder. The pasta and sauce was meant to be the easy bit for him (he likes it most times) but he still chose to make a right song and dance. I feel like we’re locked in a he complains/we react kind of cycle.

I'll probably get flamed for this , but I'm old school! I'd say " Tom, get down from the table and go to your room, if you decide you want to eat with us you may come back in 5 minutes "
Then carry on without him.

I'm another who would not put up with his attitude. I would send him to his room and say he can join the family at the table when he can behave politely. Give him a five minute time out to start with. At his age he needs to learn consideration for other people.