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Original poster

Friendship groups

4 replies

Willowmartha1 · 09/09/2020 16:52

I know there's no solution just wanted to vent my sadness and wondered if anyone else is In the same boat. My dd 8 with suspected ASD really really struggles to make friends at school. She made a friend at her new school before lockdown who she really liked but when she went back last week the new friend had been placed next to the popular girl in the class (who already has numerous other friends) and they are now very friendly. Tonight I saw them coming out of school together obviously having a pay date together as they went home with the popular girls mum. I steered my dd away so she didn't see but it's so hard and heartbreaking that no one wants to be my little girls friend.

OP posts:
peakotter · 09/09/2020 19:04

my 8yo son is the same. We have found that having family friends has really helped. His best friend is the 12yo son of our friends who is similar in temperament. As the whole family is friends with our family we do lots together so it gives us lots of chances to nurture the friendship.

He has started to make a few friends at school but generally I have picked the family based on knowing the parents and tried to encourage the friendship that way. If you find parents with good values then hopefully they will encourage their child to be kind. At this age you can still pick their friends to some extent.

It’s tough but stick with it, friendship is such an important skill to learn at this age.

Mamabear12 · 09/09/2020 22:52

Have you tried to set up play dates? For example, my dd tends to focus on one friend at a time (like a best friend and they always play together). But we try to encourage more variety. So I try to arrange play dates with others and encourage different friendships. I will just decide who to set up the play date with...but of course it’s w girls she is friendly with. Not ransoms!

Mamabear12 · 09/09/2020 22:53

And you could try to set up a play date w the friend. Just because she is now friends with the popular girl doesn’t mean she can’t be friends w your dd.

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Original poster
Willowmartha1 · 10/09/2020 07:24

I thought about arranging this but my dd is so shy and the girl ignores her now and plays with others at playtime !

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