DS is 6 and has a poor relationship with his dad. Mostly due to his dad being inconsistent with contact. After 6 years of inconsistent contact it's honestly such a draining thing, and I can't wait till DS is old enough to sort it himself.
DS's dad and paternal grandmother generally only "pop up" on "special occasions". So they suddenly want contact and it's not too long before they essentially disappear, until it's a birthday or Christmas.
I have sorted child maintenance through CSA this year and it seems to have upped dad "wanting contact". His paternal family (for reasons unknown to me) have not seen DS since January 2019, just to give an idea of how long they can go without bothering with him. They never ask to see DS. Since about April this year his dad started sending me messages asking to ring DS every day and going on about how I can't keep him from DS. I was very firm in that I didn't think it was in DS's best interests to go from having had no contact from his dad, to calls everyday and asked that he start at a phone call once a week.
Initially I suggested a Sunday and gave an hour slot as this also helps me in ensuring I make DS available. Ex wasn't happy with this as essentially I think he wants to call as and when. I then suggested Monday in the short term as schools were closed and explained that this would need to change to Sunday when back at school.. So we've been doing Mondays and have now reverted to Sunday's as schools are open.
Today is the first Sunday and surprise surprise he hasn't called DS or even sent a message.
We've instead had a call from paternal grandma, saying she misses DS and wants to see him as it's his birthday next week.
I'm abit anxious because of COVID restrictions (paternal grandma if I remember correctly lives in an area currently under lockdown measures)
I am also 29 weeks pregnant so feeling quiet vulnerable re. Covid anyway.
I felt forced to say yes to meeting in a park near our home, and gave her a few possible dates but when I've asked her who she is coming with and if she's okay following measures in place, she's basically only replied saying "I'll look at the dates when I'm back home Cos I'm out for the rest of the day"
I'm also feeling a bit worried for my son as I feel this may just be a one time visit and then she doesn't bother with him again.
Just feel at a loss for what to do as they always blame me for ex not seeing DS, despite me never having said no. All I've ever asked for is consistent frequency for telephone calls/ face to face contact.