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Social services advice please?!

13 replies

User0000011 · 04/09/2020 16:15

So basically, on Tuesday 1st September, my 4.5 month old rolled off the settee and he's grazed his nose. I left him sleeping on the settee (yes I know I was wrong about doing that. I just nipped to the toilet for about 3 minutes and I usually put him in his cot. I hate myself for it). There was a bit of blood in his nose so I rang 111. They told me to go to A&E. So I did. And I was sent to a pediatrician because of his age etc. For safe guarding. Which is fine. The Dr I saw there asked me questions so I told him. He didn't explain anything to me, left, and came back with a camera. Took pictures of his face and his Mongolian blue spot birth mark (my lb is mixed race) then went again and came back and said he had rang social services and I have to stay in so my lb can have a head to toe scan/x ray. I thought the social services was just protocol until I spoke to the Dr that came to see me the next day. She was really nice and explained everything to me and at the end she said that social services are contacted when all scans are done to arrange a strategy meeting because they go by medical first. Not one Dr or nurse has concerns. All his bloods, x rays, CT and eye test have been fine. I got a phone call from the ss saying they're going to visit my other two children about what happened. Obvs they backed my story up but the Dr said they shouldn't have even been out and was really shocked. The social worker then rang me and said they'd had a meeting with a professional and that Dr has raised concerns so she's on her way with a police officer. So I called a nurse in and asked about it. She went to find out and came back to tell me no one knows what's going on. They're still trying to find this Dr. He hasn't written any notes down in the strategy meeting. Nothing. So he's said it and not written it down. They have no clue as to what's going on. So I was questioned by the police officer and I told them what happened. And they said no further action. Today, he was given the all clear to be discharged by the Dr's. The head nurse called the social worker to advise her about this as they needed approval from ss to allow me to go home. The social worker has turned around and said the nurses word isn't good enough and she wants to hear it from a Dr.

Has anyone had this experience before? I feel like it's been taken way ott. I know that safe guarding is an amazing thing and it saves children who are being abused. But I just feel like I'm being accused of doing something I haven't done. Thank you.

OP posts:
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Lockdownseperation · 04/09/2020 16:23

I think you would be within your rights to put in a complaint to the hospital that correct procedure wasn’t followed ie completing notes.

Oblomov20 · 04/09/2020 16:26

This is disgraceful OP. You need to contact the hospital re a complaint. This is very poor.

FatCatThinCat · 04/09/2020 16:29

Do you think they think his birth mark is bruising? Otherwise it does seem very OTT for a fall off the sofa.

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Spied · 04/09/2020 16:30

I'd be making a complaint.
They're still trying to find the Dr?
Who the hell were they?
No notes?
Whole thing is an abomination.

SadSack39 · 04/09/2020 16:32

What can u do? Complaining wont achieve much tbh

SadSack39 · 04/09/2020 16:38

To be fair doctors have to make these decisions with little to go on, just accepy they got it wrong this time and be glad they are so vigilant

GeorgiaGirl52 · 04/09/2020 16:38

Had the same problem with a pediatrician. My oldest DD had Mongolian blue birth mark. Went to new pediatrician when she was two years old and the doctor made an accusation. I had to explain to him what it was. Of course he didn't believe me, looked it up on internet AND called our previous pediatrician. Finally admitted he had got it wrong, but by then SS and police were there. He looked her all over for anything that could justify the call, but could only find two mosquito bites.
Naturally we never went back to his office.

disorganisedsecretsquirrel · 04/09/2020 17:47

Mine are all in there 20s now but also mixed race and have Mongolian blue spot.. fucking nightmare !!!

Mine also rolled off sofa and broke her nose.. took until DR confirmed MBS is an actual race differential.. 2 days in hospital under suspicion of child abuse... until Asian doctor arrived and offered to show his ... (albeit much diminished by age)

Stay calm OP.. and you will get through it !

User0000011 · 04/09/2020 21:25

Thank you everyone for sharing your advice and experiences.
So, I had a Dr come in to me earlier and explain the whole safe guarding process (for the 5th time), which I completely understood. He then proceeded to tell me that ss was on their way to explain the next steps.
They arrived and told me that I was to move out of the family home as I am only allowed supervised contact with our 3 children and they all must remain in their dads care as dad was at work when the incident happened. So, as you can imagine I was distraught.
I asked what concerns there were, and they told me that a Dr had said that my lb cannot roll over. Just by chance (and thank god for that), I had recorded him rolling over the night before to send to my partner to show him how good he is getting at it. I told them he can roll over and showed them the video. I then also put him in the cot and he did it in front of their eyes. The social workers looked at each other and straight away said they need to call their manager. Their manager said that she wants him reassessing immediately. They went for an emergency meeting with one of the consultants that was working and the consultant changed the report and thankfully I was allowed home with my children. So a very happy ending for me and my family. If I hadn't recorded him rolling, I would be not allowed unsupervised contact with my children right now. All because a Dr said he couldn't roll over 😔

OP posts:
Greyblueeyes · 04/09/2020 21:28

Omg. Please complain. I hate to think of the outcome if you hadn't had a video of him rolling over.

Completely unprofessional. I'm so sorry.

Camomila · 05/09/2020 10:25

I'm sorry this has happened to you.

For the future what I did was get the HV/GP to write on both DSs red books they have a mongolian blue spot and I take it to all medical stuff/write it down in the 'medical info' bit for school/swimming etc.

yoyoyo5678 · 05/09/2020 12:06

Wow you must be traumatised. Please complain, someone needs to be blamed for this. It might be a long and hard process but you should stick at the complaint, you've been treated like shit.

Grrretel · 05/09/2020 12:14

Oh poor you op!

There is a protocol that any injury to a non-mobile baby must be referred to social services.

I would complain to the hospital that the doctor has made an incorrect assumption (that the baby can’t roll) without asking you or having any evidence - and that this could have had a serious psychological impact on your baby and other children by being separated from their mother.
And also at the lack of notes and record keeping.

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