SAHM with kids in school; what do you do all day?

[SqidgeBum]

I am 31 weeks pregnant with DD2. I cant return to work for health reasons with coronavirus, but can't really do much WFH bar some admin, so I have gone on a sort of early maternity leave/wfh but thankfully fully paid until I give birth. We have kept DD in nursery 2-3 days a week so she has her normal routine, and DH says I need to 'take it easy'. Today is my first day baby free. I have hoovered, have a wash on, done the dishes, mopped the floor, cleaned the bathrooms, and answered some emails. Its 11:30 and I am at a loss. I am usually someone who is incredibly busy and I have a very mentally and physically demanding job, so this is quite a shock to me.

What the F am I supposed to do to keep myself going for the next 9 weeks? SAHM without kids at home all day, what do you do? How do you fill your day between 9 and 3? I am looking for genuine suggestions about things I can do in the house or out and about (with SD and maybe not something that involves going to the shops every day) to keep myself sane, but also so I feel productive.

Really?? You can't work out how to fill your day because you're normally a busy working person?

So:
Cook meals from scratch
bake
supermarket
life admin (this can take up a lot of time)
gardening
walk the dog
walk with friends
coffee with friends
shops occasionally
declutter/clean/organise
read a book
watch a film if I feel like I fancy uninterrupted downtime
exercise
hobbies (I crochet for example)
mumsnet
occasional nap

The list could go on...

Have a bath. Read a book. These are the top two things for me. Uninterrupted.

Maybe make a project of batch cooking for the next few weeks so that you can freeze a heap of meals in advance of the baby's arrival?

Well you obviously need to work on gaining a life outside of work, I don’t understand people who just live and die for work and don’t have a clue what to do outside that.

Don’t just become a house keeper either, it doesn’t take all day every day to clean a house.

Try to gain some hobbies and explore interests.

@AuntImmortelle honestly, yes. I havent had a non-working day bar holidays and maternity leave in a decade. I am serious when I say I dont know what to do.

I know I could sit and watch tv or read, but I think I feel guilty for doing that. Its sort of a thing in my head. I feel like I should do something ..... productive.

I am sorry if that doesnt make much sense to you, or makes you angry. That wasnt my intention.

Oh and I have friends, they just all work haha

I'm a sahm to a toddler so not in this position but could definitely fill my time if I was. You could batch cook and freeze meals ready for when you have a newborn? I appreciate everyone is different but you'll soon be very busy with two so if I were you I'd enjoy a bit of time to do whatever you want. Any hobbies you enjoy?

Ahh you could work on that then, feeling guilty for doing nothing all day is common. It’s also hard for some adults to sit still and just be. You shouldn’t feel guilty for resting your body and mind.

@Redcups64

Well you obviously need to work on gaining a life outside of work, I don’t understand people who just live and die for work and don’t have a clue what to do outside that.

Don’t just become a house keeper either, it doesn’t take all day every day to clean a house.

Try to gain some hobbies and explore interests.

This.

Iirc Age Concern used to do a befriending scheme where volunteers call elderly people who are lonely for a chat and to check they're ok.

I have a couple of voluntary roles, I do all the boring household stuff, I go for walks/coffee/lunch with friends, read, Netflix. No two days are the same so I don't get bored!

Pregnancy yoga
Cook something incredible
Do something for a neighbour
Read
Online course
Make new cushion covers?!

Learn to crochet or knit and make those little teddies hospitals sell to raise extra money.

Im like this if DD has a nap for an hour! I dont ever start anything too big because its sods law if i do, shell wake up after 20 mins, if i dont, she sleeps for 2 hours🙄

Drawers/cupboards/ paperwork or a toy throw out are usually my go to, or draw if im in the right mood.

If i dont have either kids, which is a rarity, i just end up wandering around rearranging cushions..

Well then - you need to stop feeling guilty. You are doing something productive - you're pregnant! And you know its going to be full on when baby 2 arrives so do put your feet up and read a book, watch a film etc. because you won't get that chance for a long time.

And agreed - you are not the default housekeeper. I will freely admit but I am one of those SAHM with a cleaner. Shame on me apparently. (Though I do change beds and wash and iron, so not a complete lazy cow).

Life admin. Car admin. House admin.
Project managing home repairs.
Food shopping. Batch cooking.
Reviewing finances and reducing outgoings eg insurance and utilities. Searching for a savings account with a better rate than 0.01%.
Sorting stuff for storage in the loft.
Having a clear out. Actually emptying cupboards completely, cleaning them and putting back only things to keep!
Selling stuff on eBay.
Cleaning the car.
Hoovering the garden.
Cooking.
Thinking about food every 30mins.
Napping.
Looking on rightmove.
Watching only 1 hour of TV during the day.
Pilates during the day instead of the evening. Taking a stroll.
Volunteering.

My mat leave sort of started in July by taking holiday prior to mat leave. Baby not due for another 3 ish weeks. I'm also someone who felt physically and mentally busy prior to this! I write myself a list of jobs to do each day so I can justify my days.

I do everything that would otherwise be a weekend project or an evening chore. There is always some maintenance that needs doing.
It’s a bit easier at the moment without afterschool activities to fill the afternoons, so the pace is more gentle for now but I’ve never found it a problem to keep busy.

Go swimming

I always find these threads strange. I can't imagine having so few things that interest me that I can think of nothing to do if I'm not working.

I'd get through my book backlog for a start before getting into any other hobbies or interests or general jobs around the house that have been waiting to be done forever.

What do you do at the weekend when your not working? Do that!

I'm a SAHM with one 5 year old but I'm also a carer for my DH. When DC is at school, and when I'm not helping my DH, I do the following:
Running 3 times a week
All the housework, including bins, shopping, hoovering, all washing, DH does cook when he feels up to it.
Gardening, landscaping, DIY, decorating, laying flooring - we bought a house that needs a lot of work and I am gradually doing each room and sorting out the garden.
Before lockdown I was also volunteering one day a week but that hasn't started up again yet.
Sometimes we have trips out to NT places or countryside when DH is up to it.
When I'm feeling knackered I catch up on TV, read, learn languages on Duolingo etc.
I always have something to do!

On a more practical note.

Suggestions:
Read
Learn a language
Knit
Volunteer
Do a course (there are loads of free inline ones)
Swim
Bake
Watch Netflix if you want

As someone who had 2 early babies, I say put your feet up and watch boxsets.

There are some seriously good suggestions here! Thank you so much everyone!

You're pregnant, think of everything you do as nourishing your baby and yourself. I know what you mean as I had to finish work 2 months early with my last pregnancy and got very restless. Pregnancy yoga, walking, meditation and swimming (if any are open near you) and similar activities are good as it's preparing your mind and body for birth, so still productive. Any hobbies you won't get chance to do when you have a newborn? I was anemic and did a lot of sleeping, I considered this productive since me and baby obviously needed it! I certainly haven't had chance to nap since.

I had two months bed rest in one pregnancy, and when anybody asked me how I was filling my time I’d cheerfully say “I’m growing a human!”. Honestly that’s enough, you don’t need to do anything else.

But if you want to - then batch cooking is always a good idea.

Duolingo. Unlimited free lives on your laptop (not on your phone, sadly).

All the things you can't do with a baby.

Strolling through your neighbourhood smelling the flowers and looking up as well as in front of you.

Tidying out the shed. Refilling shed with cheap bulk purchases of things that will be useful with baby.

Buy and wrap Christmas presents and stocking for older child. But take photos so you can remember what you have done.

Grow some plants.