Breastfeeding and saccharine - feel so guilty

[Vassalisa]

Hello

Please can anyone reassure me that I haven’t just irreparably harmed DD’s health? I’m feeling like the worst mum in the world, after consuming saccharine twice a day for at least a month earlier this year, then another week earlier this month, whilst ill and breastfeeding my baby.

Long explanation (sorry):

The sodium saccharine was in a vitamin C effervescent tablet drink that I resorted to in desperation after being ill with Covid for 6 weeks and feeling worse, not better. I was having continuing breathlessness, lung pains, insomnia and heart palpitations. The GP was no help - I fell ill before the lockdown and Long Covid wasn’t recognised til much later - and more than one GP suggested I merely had anxiety. I had already been taken by ambulance to A&E once due to chest pain and breathing difficulties. As a result, GP declined to arrange any further X-rays or blood tests.

I decided to start taking the drink because soluble Vitamin C is the only thing that I’ve found has ever helped me with respiratory illness (which I have thankfully not suffered much from, until Covid). Before I took it, I did quite a lot of research into safe levels of Vitamin C for breastfeeding mums and never exceeded this dose. But I neglected to check out the sweeteners also contained in the drink :( It did not say on the packet that breastfeeding mothers shouldn’t take it, only to refer to ones healthcare practitioner before taking it.

Now I’ve discovered that saccharine is, apparently, the only sweetener that can get into human breastmilk and is thought to disrupt the baby’s microbiome and metabolism, predisposing the baby to future ill-health and obesity. I feel terrible about this, especially as DD was born through a EMCS which is known to disrupt the microbiome already.

DD is 10 months old, 95th centile in weight but only 75th in height. She has always been EBF and we started BLW at 7 months. She has a healthy diet, organic food as much as we can access/afford. HV is not especially worried about DD’s weight at the moment - she was jumping up the centiles before we started BLW (and indeed before I became ill). She seems happy and healthy and has had no illnesses so far (and touch wood, won’t) but I’m so worried about how the saccharine may have affected her.

Aside from the effervescent Vitamin C, I’ve tried really hard to avoid chemicals - no sweeteners in pregnancy or breastfeeding until Covid, no BPA/phthalates etc, washable nappies, eco detergent etc.

All I knew is that I was having frightening symptoms, wasn’t getting better, immune system revved up at night so couldn’t sleep (a common symptom) and genuinely feared being hospitalised and DD being fed through a tube :(

As soon as I started taking the Vitamin C drink, I started to feel a lot better, but it took months to get to the point where I could go for a short walk. (I’m now mostly recovered). I now know I should have gone for an alternative brand without the saccharine, and I just don’t know why I didn’t. I do know that I was very scared for months.

I was prescribed antibiotics and amitryptiline (took each only for a few days) and took paracetamol at night for a couple of weeks too. I’m fortunate to have rarely needed medication until this year, and generally avoid sweeteners. Now feel it’s all gone to pot, just when I needed, for DD’s sake, more than ever to avoid this stuff.

Now that I’ve definitely stopped the saccharine, is there a way any effects on her could be reversed?

Just wanted to add that I did complete the course of antibiotics.

Aside from the effervescent Vitamin C, I’ve tried really hard to avoid chemicals

Everything is made of chemicals. Including air, water and you. Natural doesn’t mean automatically good - see arsenic and ricin.

Your baby will be fine. I’d gently suggest you get some help for this health anxiety because it’s completely out of proportion. You needed the vitamin - think of it as your oxygen mask. You won’t be able to tell your child apart from the ones fed pouches and chips in a year or two. This level of pressure on yourself is exhausting.

I think you need to see the doctor about your anxiety.

Lots of babies her age drink sugar-free juice with sweeteners and survive. I am sure the tiny amount of saccharine in your breast milk won't do anything in the grand scheme of things. There is a temptation to try and achieve perfection for our children, but it risks damaging our mental health.

It's a tiny, tiny amount she would have had. You really need to work on your anxiety

From a place of concern I agree that you should consider speaking to your GP about your anxiety. This is not a normal level of concern.

Agree with others that this is your anxiety talking and you should seek help for this. Your DD hasn't been harmed - it would be a miniscule amount (if anything) that she would have ingested.

I agree with pp, your anxiety is much more of an issue than sweeteners. She'll be fine

I honestly think you have researched yourself into an anxiety hole. This isnt normal I am afraid. You dont need to be worried to this level about 'chemicals' and saccharine. Babies are sturdy creatures. They are, and should be, exposed to the world in order for their bodies to get used to what's in the world.

I think you should speak to someone about your worry levels. It cant be easy living like that.