witnessing child abuse, what should i do?

[Bubblz]

Last night I went to my local Sainsbury's and heard a woman calling her daughter. The girl, who was about 13 years old, didn't respond. When her mother shouted abuse at her for it, the girl told her mother that she hadn't heard her. The woman grabbed the girl by the neck, threw her against a wall and said she was going to wring her f*?!ing neck. The girl managed to get away and ran into the supermarket. The woman had another daughter with her, probably about 2 years old, whom she treated just as appallingly as the older child.

I have never before seen anything like this, so after I'd scraped my jaw from the floor , I managed to catch the older girl on her own. She had a red mark on her neck where her mother had grabbed her. I didn't want to get her in trouble with her mother, so I hurriedly told her I'd seen what her mother had done and was very sorry about it. I also told her to keep her head up and hold on to the thought that she's a wonderful and beautiful child. She was very gracious, she smiled and thanked me.

I cried bitterly all the way home because that poor child was going home with that woman to be abused again and there was absolutely nothing I could do about it. I have thought of calling NSPCC but I don't even know the girl's name. I've even considered going back to Sainsbury's to ask if they can identify her from CCTV footage, but then what? I don't want the children to end up in care, courtesy of yours truly, yet at the same time they don't deserve the kind of life that they have now.

I don't know what they have in terms of support from family and friends. The woman was with a female friend of hers who witnessed the abuse but carried on as if nothing had happened. If someone that close can turn a blind eye, then those poor children must be going through hell. Please help, I can't get them out of my mind.

but even with a good describtion, there would be no proof it was the same family, its sad but true. If someone had part of a name, it could be saved that way. The other issue is the different SS have different systems but dont get me started on that!!

But a witness description is enough for the police - why not for social services?

because police have different powers to SS. Its also a question of where to put the infomation on the system so someone else could find it??
Its not a fool proof system

I can't quite believe I'm hearing this in 2007.

If the mother can do this in public, God knows what she does behind closed door.
for those poor children.

nspcc will get involved when SS may already be involved but don't necessarily do anything.

The mother sounds mentally ill.
Bubblz, you might have more luck if you talked to the supermarket staff - checkout person if you'd recognise him/her and the manager. If it's not a huge shop they might have noticed the family before and someone might want to do something off the record eg name on a card?
In the meantime if it's bothering you that much, get a fundraising pack and posters from NSPCC and start painting your town with green spots. Someone might see it who needs it, if not your girl.

Avoiding - it's good to hear that some people use technology to its best advantage and can make a difference. I find it absurd that social services have witnesses ignored because they haven't got a name or address. What about the witness's name and address?

I remember with the Victoria Climbie case that many people had said they had called social services several times. Guess we know now what happened with their information. Noted and shredded.

Folowing this thread with interest-Bubblz well done you for being so concerned.

One thing to mention to anyone concerned with the will I/won't I ring SS debate. When I did a Child Protection course the thing that stuck with me is that SS often say the best info comes in bits & pieces. Your little fragment probably won't result in any action, my little piece might not or Bublz either. But all 3 together MIGHT just fill in the blanks for SS/police with other reports & sightings from others, & lead to a child being helped.It's a puzzle waiting to be completed.

Don't EVER be afraid to report something however trivial. Yes it might be shredded at the end of the day, yes it probably won't get actioned, but at least you have tried & it MIGHT make all the difference.....

(and apologies to all SS workers on here who might be howling NOOOOOOO I'm busy enough!!)

What an awful thing to witness.

IMHO there is NO excuse for what that woman did to her children. No matter how much my little buggers r7un me ragged, I would never ever do that to them.

I thgink you are doing a good thing to try and track them down. If she can do that in public, what the fuck is she doing to them in the priovacy of thier own home.

These thibgs make me feel hart broken and incandescent with rage in equal measures.

This is so awful and I agree with others that this sounds like usual behaviour for this mum. SOunds like she is very angry all the time and just think - if you were able to help her kids may not end up in care but she might get some support to sort herself out. Or am I being totally naive and hopeful about the social services in the UK?

My advice for next time (in case you see her again?) is to find out what school and what year she is in and talk to her teacher. And tell her to go to her GP and talk about it there/look for leaflets to help?

Really sorry you witnessed this

Just thinking, (and perhaps this has already been said but I didn't see it yet) but sainsburys may have security cameras that might have caught the incident that the NSPCC could access is they try to follow up. What about the police? They also could see if anything was on the tape? It certainly was an assault. It could have been isolated but you said mom was also nasty to the little child too. I would make a call.