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Co parenting with abusive ex

0 replies

lollimogs · 23/08/2020 22:05

Hi, I need advice. My ex is a narcissist and uses controlling, coercive and manipulating behaviour. The children and I left him 2yrs ago and the more I remain 'grey rock', the worse it gets!

He's constantly changing goal posts, telling me I can't have the kids back ie... half term, covid extends holidays by 4 days - he wants them for an extra week, so he's not letting me have them back until the end of that week - despite me having plans for them.

I understand this battle is one I will fight for years to come (he has two prior children who want nothing to do with him), but my concern is that he's making up lies in his texts saying I've said things I haven't so he can use them as 'evidence' that they are fact in court. The court order says Contact must be through his dad and this was so the abuse would be diluted, but he doesn't - his aggressive texts are sent to my dad so his doesn't see them and I'm in breach of court order if I don't reply or he'll text my dad about changing their collection day and my ignorance is seen as acceptance. I want to get a restraining order against him harassing me, but Because there is a child element in all the 'woe is me', I don't know what good it will do, because his abuse is him making lies up about me and changing plans without my consent.
Do you have any ideas please? It's like a constant chess game just to hold my ground x

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