Why are Americans so against reins?

[Difuser16]

I've seen so many articles lately about reins or as they are called in America leashes and about how it's basically frowned upon to use them.

I seen something on Facebook about how a mum from America was slammed for putting her child on a leash and I was just thinking that's normal to me!!

I feel like the majority of people in England use them. I don't see the big deal in using them. I have a 17 month old son and I use them on him when walking down the road but if we are in a open area like the park or beach or something he runs free.

Just wondering why they are so against them?

No idea. I think people should just use them as necessary. If you have a child that wanders off or live near roads and child not contained in pram, then use whatever keeps them safe.

Its is a leash basically, but you use a leash on a dog to keep them safe so the same difference

As here, the people against reins are the ones who use a car everywhere and never walk with wee kids. Only there, in many areas walking at all is frowned upon, huge suburbs with no sidewalks to walk on, etc.

City dwellers who do walk use the things.

We've used reins in the past with DS 23 months, but he's going through a good spell with holding our hands so we're not bothering right now. But I'll definitely be keeping them handy as you just don't know how their behaviour could change!

I have 4 DSs and never used reins but equally have nothing against them.

I think it's a cultural thing and yes, taking the car everywhere in the States will be part of that.

Having said that, in the same way as I don't like seeing some people pulling their dogs hard on on their collars, I do think sometimes reins seem to be used more for the parent's convenience than the child's safety. Sometimes.

I think we all do whatever we think is safest for our child - I cannot find in within me to get het up about reins tbh.

Loads of Americans use them too so I think your assumption is wrong from the start (I'm from the US).

Disagree it's a city/suburb thing. We've always lived in big cities and never used reins, have rarely seen them. I've only really seen them in big suburban shopping malls.

I personally would never use them but I never judge people who do because you never know their situation.

I am an American in my late 30's and my mom used a leash on my brother when he was small as he regularly wandered off (and once actually left a store) and there were 3 of us to manage. In the 80's though it was more like a dog leash and went from her wrist to his wrist and I think that's what people object to - the perception of treating children like animals.

Both my DC had the tiny backpack that clipped in the front with a strap attached at the back and it was a lifesaver. I used it here in the UK and whenever we were in the US and no one ever batted an eyelid.

We care enough about our dogs to put them on a lead so they don't run in front of cars - seems mad to me that we would take less care of our children. Especially if you have a bolter!
I lived in Germany for a while in the early 2000s and was the only mum using reins. I got some funny looks and questions. But it wasn't my child darting out of the supermarket, straight into a busy car park.

Could it be because there are a lot of places in the US where you drive everywhere and people don't walk near roads?

It baffles me that people would be against them or declare they would never use them. They are a safety device like many others. They keep your toddler safe and next to you without them having to hold your hand. A harness keeps a toddler in a car seat or a buggy, a helmet or knee pads keep them safer on a scooter, I really don't see a difference.

I'm really not judging Americans or judging people who don't use them. I do just find it strange how it's so accepted here and from what I've seen on the internet it's frowned upon a lot more in America.

I use the backpack version for my son and if I didn't god help me 😂

It's not just traffic though.

I'm not a parent, but when I was a kid (I'm 54) they were common. I remember my parents using them on my younger sister and my cousins had them too. I assume me and my brothers also had them. Back then, people walked more (there weren't really baby buggies, for instance, so getting the big Silver Cross prams on a bus was a no-go) so were probably seen as more essential.

Then they seemed to go out of fashion....but come the early 90s and James Bulger was abducted and murdered and parents realised how easy that could happen to them, and they came back into fashion.

I would certainly use them if I had kids or an equivalent like the rucksack things or wrist straps.

I keep my dog on a leash when I'm walking her in the street, otherwise she'd run out into traffic when she came near the park/saw another dog/cat/squirrel. She ain't streetwise. It's to keep her safe. Same as for a child. A dog can be quick. Same as for a child. They'd be attracted by a friend, a cat, an ice cream van, seeing Daddy across the road.

People object to them because not all toddlers need them. Of course every child needs to be in a carseat or wear a helmet because every child is at risk of an accident. But not every child runs off, or is one of three to be wrangled or what have you.

I genuinely never felt the need for one with my DS. Personally that doesn't make me judgy of others, but if you are wondering why some people are that way, it's because they never needed them and don't see why others would.

@Spidey66 I completely agree with you! I was born in 93 in Liverpool. I don't live far from we're Jamie bulger was abducted. Obviously I can't remember but all photos of me from a young age I have reins on!

I just don't understand how they are so frowned upon!

I dont know. But what mattered to me was having my child under control and kept safe. I didn't give a shit what anyone thought about it. They wont be the ones spending hours in a&e or making heartbreaking decisions will they .

Sure many Americans feel the same.

I'm in the UK and I've hardly seen anyone using them.
You teach your child to hold your hand and not run off. If they do then put them in a buggy. I think unless a child has special needs and isn't capable of understanding then they don't need to wear them.

You teach your child to hold your hand and not run off

Kids start walking at about 10 months onwards. Goodluck telling a one Yr old ti stay put while you collapse the buggy and get out your bus fare etc reims make that easier you can hook them round your leg etc

@dreamingbohemian I completely understand some people don't want or need to use them!

The article I seen, I read the comments and there was a lot of negative comments about parents who do use them. In my head I just can't see the negative of using them and I was just wondering why they are so frowned upon.

@loutypips I completely disagree with you. My child doesn't have special needs and I still put backpack reins on him.

But they wouldn't object to them, they just don't need them. We needed reins because OH and I are tall. It must be pretty uncomfortable to walk with your arm up in the air for any length of time when you are small, even if someone is holding your hand.

I use one most days with DS who is 16 months. He just runs and wouldn’t even look back for me. I’m also 37 weeks pregnant and way too slow but I find people give me funny looks for using it. I don’t care though because he wouldn’t be safe if I let him run into the road.

I always put the loop over my wrist or elbow and hold DDs hand, I don't drag her around like a dog. It's a back up in case she lets go of my hand and tries to make a break for it somewhere dangerous.

it was more like a dog leash and went from her wrist to his wrist and I think that's what people object to - the perception of treating children like animals.

The wrist leashes break very easily so are about as useful as a chocolate teapot, but worse because the parent thinks the child is safe.

I think its the UK that is the outlier.

I've rarely seen them in other parts of Europe and friends/family from Europe are generally mystified by the prevalance of them here in the UK.

@loutypips absolutely disagree with you. My child is very well behaved and will respect boundaries with the road etc. However there are times when we take a long walk and stop off in a few shops and a cash point and those few seconds that I need to use both hands to pack a bag or use a cash point it's very handy to have the reassurance of a leash.
There is a MN user here who often visits these threads to explain how her husband refused to 'leash' their toddler and they farted uncharacteristically into the road and died.
I personally don't use our backpack reigns everywhere we go but there are certainly occasions I've been grateful for them.

Do they call them leashes? That makes me think of a dog leash