In laws

[bethany19]

My daughter is one years old and my DHs family have seen her maybe 8times. She's met the grandad once (on her 1st birthday) and they've asked to see her this weekend (I haven't been invited). They make little effort with me an so I barely know them. When my daughter has been round there all they do is either moan that she doesn't want to go to them or they want to just take pictures.

What would you do in this situation? Feels as though I'm dropping my daughter off to strangers!

How rude!
Nope from me if I’m not invited then baby won’t be going
Would her father be with her? If so that’s even more rude excluding you best arrange to meet in a park somewhere together and leave when you want to

Your not invited? Eh that would be a no from me as my priority is my DC who doesnt sound would be very happy in there company

@mamas12 @sunflowersandtulips50
Nope I never really am invited yet I'm expected to drop my daughter to theirs! My mother in law has never asked for my number and hasn't ever messaged me to or wished me a happy birthday. When I have been round there she will talk to me here and there but I still feel u welcome and my daughter doesn't like being there much either. My DH won't be there as he hates his dad so doesn't want to be in the same room as him so there won't be a familiar face for my daughter

My DH won't be there as he hates his dad so doesn't want to be in the same room as him so there won't be a familiar face for my daughter

Eh? In that case, the answer is a clear NO and NOT EVER. Why are you and your husband in contact with them at all? Obviously, there is massive dysfunction within your husband's family. There is not a chance in hell I would just drop my baby off to these people.

You can't drop your DD off with strangers. That is what they are to her. Just tell them it doesn't suit you

I had a word with DH and he said I can go there too then. I don't want to because it's always awkward for me but I know if I say no completely it'll cause an argument.

I also said what is the point in our daughter building a relationship with his dad if he doesn't intend to rectify their relationship. Makes no sense to me!

DD would not be going. Argument or not.
DD wouldn't be comfortable.

I had a word with DH and he said I can go there too then. I don't want to because it's always awkward for me but I know if I say no completely it'll cause an argument.

It takes 2 people to argue. Tell your husband no and refuse to discuss it further. If he's so concerned about his family seeing your child, he can swallow his pride and be around his father for an hour.

Do not allow yourself to be bullied by your husband or anyone else.

Agree with Aquamarine. If DH doesn't want to see his Dad, why does he want his DD to.

Why on earth would you drop your DD off with strangers?

Just say "no"

So you and your DH have no relationship with these people and drop your dd to them , someone she barely knows. Sorry but that must be terribly distressing for your DD. Stop. facilitating this nonsense

This sounds like a really weird set up. It sounds like your ILs need to work on their relationship with their son and dropping off a 1 year old with people she barely knows is weird.

Why don't you invite them for a short time to yours, at least a start in trying to develop a relationship. That way you are there with your DD and are in control of the situation.

I've spoken to my DH and decided that I will go with DD on Sunday. Even though I'm not fond of his family, I'm going to do it for my daughter so she gets the chance to know them. Once I am fully comfortable that will be when I can leave her alone but probably wouldn't be until she's 14 😅