Toddler screaming when left with Dad

[NewMum293]

My 16 month old DD has gotten into the habit of screaming and crying if we (me, her and my husband) are all together in the room and I leave the room, or if I hand her to him for bedtime etc. Is this just a phase?

For context, he is a very hands-on dad (nappies, bath time, dinner, nursery drop offs and pick ups - he also took a couple of months shared parental leave when she was 6 months old) and they get on really well. It’s just that if I’m around, she is tending to show a real preference for me and getting very upset if eg she wants me to read her a book and I’m not able to (due to eg work) and pass it to my husband.

She’s in nursery 3 days a week and loves it - no problems at drop off etc so don’t think it’s straight forward separation anxiety.

Any thoughts welcome as I think it’s starting to get to my husband. We are pushing through and trying to ensure that she gets lots of quality time with him, sometimes with me around and sometimes without.

Thanks in advance x

Anyone? x

My DD was just like this but my ex was far less hands on than your DH sounds like he is. All you can really do is push through and tell him not to take it personally. It will likely flip at some point in the next few years

They all, well most, go through these phases... that’s the key age for separation anxiety. I would suggest OH just says mummy is coming back then tries to distract. Your DC will outgrow this 😊

We are still going through this with my 2.5year old. I have been 'leaving' the house every other night so his dad can do bedtime without him crying for me. He's fine with his dad once I go. We are hoping at some stage he will accept his dad doing more and I won't have to go out but not yet happened.

Ahhh my DD started doing this around that age. It just suddenly happened. Like your DH mine is a fully committed and 'hands on' father to her and she was always fine with him if I wasn't there. She's now 26 months and it has improved a little but she will still shout "no daddy" and screech and want me instead sometimes most notably first thing in the morning for some reason. Tbh when she was a baby she had a bit of a preference for DH over me so I am assuming it will just pass from one of us to the other over and over in phases! Tell DH to try not to take it personally.

Thank you all. I thought it might just be one of those things but good to have confirmation! Much appreciated x

Yes DD is 2 now and still very much in the mummy phase, especially when she’s tired. Sometimes she tries to push DP out of the room!

Mine is all me (mum) and like PP, I have to busy myself elsewhere to let OH take over. I've been buying a lot of chocolate bars in the corner shop recently. I miss the days of "no mama, dada do it!"