Exhausted parent

[Constance1024]

hi all, first time mum to a 16month old and I feel that im at breaking point. DD is great and I personally found the first year a breeze. But Im now back to work full time and since lockdown life has not been easy. my husband and I have been managing full time work at home and sharing DD between us throughout the day. Unfortunately my partners parents passed away before we had a baby and we have no other options for any help with DD. Apart from when nursery reopen.

DD had a hard time getting to sleep tonight. When she finally fell asleep I just broke down. Life seems so overwhelming at the moment with trying to juggle everything, which is made harder by getting up at 5am evert morning. I feel like I've hit a wall is anyone else in this situation?

Anyone else with no options for the odd break? Or no grandparents to chip in every now and again?

My DP and I have the same issue with our 7m old ds. Divide the time spent with DC. Both explain with the current situation and no child care that you both need more flexibility in your hours. We both do 35 hours over 7 days. Im a trainee solicitor, ad as people like to buy on fridays, thurs/fri are my days, my DP works while DS naps. Housework has taken a nosedive but DS is happy and we get our hours in so win win.

Yep absolutely feel you. If this is the first time you’ve had a breakdown you are doing amazingly well. And you waited til your LO was asleep, another win to be fair!

I’ve lost it more than I like to admit, similar situation with an older DD. It becomes relentless, no matter how good your children are. The guilt and exhaustion is overwhelming on top of the actual work and the physical stuff; playing, cooking, tidying. It is bloody hard.

I’m so sorry I have no advice to offer! I use the tv way more than in ever have to make sure I’m eating and drinking and having a sit down with a cup of tea to switch off for a little bit while DD is entertained.

I think it’s a lot, a full time job and of course being a parent which is a full time job too. So you never really get that break, that “me time” to unwind and be engaged with yourself. Just want to say you both are doing amazing, well done.

Keep your chin up, if you feel like having a cry then have one. Excuse yourself and just take some time in another room and let it out, it’s healthier than bottling it up.

Motherhood/parenthood is a rollercoaster of emotions. It takes time for hormones to balance out as you are between lack of sleep, nappies, bottles, working, housework, cooking etc.

Just know that you’re amazing

Also what I found helped me (especially as my 1year old is very clingy at the minute) was just leaving her to it with some toys in a safe zone, and having a cup of tea and 15 minutes of just breathing and taking the day in

Didn't want to read and run. I know it's
Not an answer; but I promise it gets easier x

You are doing an amazing job and there's no shame in having a good cry to let it all out.
We are in a similar situation and definitely feeling the strain. DH is full time from home, I'm part time from home. We have a 3year old and a 4month old and live in a different country to our families so haven't had a break since we moved here almost two years ago. Before that DH travelled a lot so I was doing the parenting and working and even then our parents were 2-3 hours drive. Breaks have been very few and far between since our 3yo arrived!
I usually check the news first thing in the morning while I'm feeding DS and on Friday the lead story was new cases in our suburb. I ket it together through the day by just focusing on the tasks that needed to be done but once the kids were in bed I crawled into bed and had a good cry about the whole sorry worldwide situation. Parenting through this is mentally, emotionally and physically exhausting. So hang in there, cry when you need to remember you're doing a fantastic job!

Thank you all so much for taking the time to message it really means a lot. I think sometimes it helps to know others are experiencing the same challenges.

Yours words were so nice to hear when I woke up this morning.

Thank you