100 walks - how to do it when toddler won't even lie down

[Laureneacooke]

Mum and dad at desperate end of tether seeking advice.

We move our toddler (27months) up to a big bed a few weeks ago. He's historically been good at self settling, has been a bit fussier since Christmas and needing a long cuddle before he is laid down.

Since moving to a big bed he has been nothing short of a terror. He will no long have his pre-bed cuddle which was always useful in calming him down. He gets out of bed the moment you move away, finds it hilarious and if you don't react, hits you.

Everything I've read, and I mean everything says you have to walk them back to bed emotionless and put them in bed, then leave. Over and over for nights on end.

My question is, how do you actually physically do that if they bounce back out the second you lie them down. Do you just put them on their bed? Are you meant to be an emotionless robot even if they are hitting you? Everything talks about lovingly lying them down - but do you have to basically pin them down (another game as far as he's concerned)? I get the theory I just really don't know how to physically do it?

Both of us are at breaking point, please be kind.

Where was he sleeping before? It sounds as though he isn’t ready for his “big bed”.

Can you move back to the cot and try again in a couple of months?

I would dig out the cot - pop him back in it (crack open the wine in relief) and think about moving him again in 6 months time.

He is still so little. Another few months will do no harm.

If his room is safe could you put a stair gate up and then just leave him to it? Returning intermittently to return him to bed and then walking back out. Hopefully the novelty of hanging out in his bedroom in the dark would ware off quickly?

Baby gate on the door and leave him too it. DS1 (now 19!) was a terror and basically fell asleep on the floor for weeks on end and we put him to bed when he was asleep. Don't remember when it stopped but it must have done as he doesn't sleep on the floor now.

Put him back in the cot and leave him to muck about by himself.

The thing is that once he's down he will stay in the bed until the morning. It's just getting him to calm down enough to stay in the bed really :(

What's your bedtime routine?

We ended up making the whole floor into a bed with a baby gate on the door, for our two.
Basically a large cot so they could be left to it. It worked a treat.

My DS was actually pretty good about going to bed, but we moved to a bed at 20 months as he was climbing out of his cot. His room was basically a cell. Everything fully babyproofed, nothing to climb on, and a gate on the door. Many a night he slept on the floor and we just scooped him into bed once he was asleep.

Also is he napping at all in the day? My current 2.5 year old is in a bed and she goes down extremely easily as long as she hasn’t napped.