Stopping BF at 2 weeks, how to stop the guilt?

[magic13]

Baby is 2 weeks, have really struggled with BF due to baby getting upset at the breast, constant latching and unlatching, never satisfied from a feed and I have to end up FF. I think for my sanity I need to stop trying because it's draining me and I need to not have one more thing to worry about but I feel so guilty about giving up and giving her bottles :( Also the constant barrage of people telling me I need to keep at it and spend the day just BF her but she just gets so upset I end up giving in to the bottle.

I’m a teacher and I can tell you know there is no difference between school Aged kids who have been formula fed and breastfed. That is for sure. best comment I have ever read on the whole internet! Are you an actual teacher with those critical thinking skills? 😂

Please don’t say you’re “giving up” because it sounds like you’ve made a bloody good go of it so far and language is powerful. You’re not a failure or a bad mum, you’re doing what is best for yourself and your baby. Two weeks is brilliant and you should be proud of yourself, not punishing yourself for choosing to stop. The most important thing for your baby is having a happy mum (and I say this as a massive advocate of BF!). Please be aware that when you stop BF your hormones will crash so try not to panic about the fact you‘ll probably feel weepy and low for a few days but if goes longer then have a chat with your GP.

You're not giving up. You're making the right choice for you and your family. Breastfeeding is just a choice to be made, like spoon feeding v baby led weaning, method of potty training, nursery v childminder, which school to choose etc etc etc. You'll have choices to make throughtout her life but for some reason breastfeeding is pushed at new mums above all else and you're made to feel like you've failed if you can't cope with it.

Your mental health is THE most important thing here. Don't risk it for something as ultimately unimportant as breastmilk. You've done two weeks which is great. Give yourself permission to give a bottle. Formula is great. You might find with the pressure off you're able to mix feed if you want to. If not, that's ok too.

If you do switch to formula, can i suggest you get a perfect prep. Life saver.

@Sheenais

Well my overall aim was to help a sad sounding new mum overcome the guilt of stopping breastfeeding, but if my comment made you laugh I am happy it gave you something to laugh about during these tough times.

Thanks, much appreciated.

@Wolfgirrl could you point me to any research about this? I’d be very interested to read and might help people decision making in this position in the future

I breastfeed my baby and he’s now just about 1, I struggled terribly to begin with. Like you he just wouldn’t latch easily and fell off as soon as he had managed to latch on!
The midwives had already checked for tongue tie when he was born, and I had amazing support in the form of a healthcare assistant who sat for ages with me trying positions etc and in the end we found a way to make sure he stayed on the breast. For me it was to basically bring his head to the breast and clamp him on quickly then I had to tickle his feet the whole time to annoy him and keep him awake and focused. Sounds bizarre but it’s what worked. The healthcare assistant had lots of experience and was an absolute miracle worker. Without her I would have used formula (not that there’s anything wrong with that but I really wanted to breastfeed).
Honestly I would hate to be a new mum right now because my health board The health visitors still aren’t doing home visits. What a nightmare - support is so crucial for successful breastfeeding, both you and baby are trying to learn something brand new!
Don’t feel guilt - if you want to use formula or even a combo of both while you still try to get the hang of breast milk that’s fine. If you want to breastfeed then is there any possibility of Professional support?